Category Archives: Assistance

May Day

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, Historical, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

May 1, 2026- As another gray day dawned, yet in a new month, Hana and I looked out at the squirrels frolicking on the lawn and in the trees, as they went about their day of climbing and parkour. (Squirrels are premier roof-vaulters.) For her part, my granddaughter was focused on army crawling and semi-crawling, as she is now able to move with her hands and knees in sync, though not yet with her torso fully off the ground.

Several people, across the country, and in some other nations,observed a day of protest. Many were on strike. May Day is traditionally a day for Organized Labour to call attention to its grievances, and on this particular day, concerns are many. We did our shopping earlier in the week, so it was not hard to honour the call to refrain from discretionary commerce. Son and daughter-in-law had light work schedules, and I, being retired, had only my labour of love to engage, as I have done every day for the last four months and two weeks. So, we were, in a de facto sense, in sync with the day’s mood.

Protest and criticism often rankle their targets. A parent may take umbrage at a child’s refusal to go along with a directive. Government officials, increasingly these days, don’t like it a bit, if citizens stand up and voice a contrary opinion. I watched a program this evening, in which a judge ordered a witness to break confidence, and the witness refused, thus invoking a contempt-of-court citation and time in a holding cell. (The judge’s move backfired, as the witness’s confider took the stand and spoke truth to power. The jury then convicted the defendant-who was a friend of the judge.)

We are all made different, distinct from one another, right down to our basic building blocks. Even identical twins have differences. So, there is no way that any two people are going to agree, 24/7. Yet, there is, especially among insecure people in positions of authority, an increasing intolerance for criticism, either public or private. The operative word here is insecure.

A better course of action is always to hear out the criticism, find points of truth in it, and examine how those points of truth could help one improve. That requires reflection and trust in one’s basic abilities.

Bugs

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 30, 2026– When my son returned from a shopping run, this evening, among the items he brought out were two electronic flying insect zappers. This sparked a conversation about the pests that occasionally find their way in from the outside-the houseflies, mosquitoes and sewer cockroaches. We maintain roach motels for the latter, which only show up after a heavy rain. So, the zappers should take care of the rest.

To be clear, we maintain strict standards of cleanliness around the house. With a baby becoming more mobile, we take no chances. Besides, who wants to “share” food with flies? The kids loathe them, and even I, in my sanguinity towards all life, will wield a fly swatter or kill a mosquito with my hands, before seeing either harm anyone in my family.

This brings up the place of scavengers in nature. Aram would gladly burn all vermin, if given the chance. So, what would the planet look like, with no flies, cockroaches, mosquitoes, rats (which we don’t have, thankfully) or carrion-eating birds? Since all living things eventually pass on, I daresay the planet would be far more of a mess, if not for the clean-up crew.

Further, I have been in places where there is either irregular trash pick-up, or none at all. My penchant for being a good citizen and picking discarded paper or plastic off a sidewalk and depositing it in a trash receptacle would have seemed ludicrous in such communities, The animals are, in such cases, fully “on the job” and humans have their work cut out for them, in maintaining hygienic boundaries in their homes.

So, we carry on with the balance of cleanliness and dirt, life and decay, conflict and resolution. The effort is a constant-and the bugs will keep getting zapped.

Threads

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 25,2026- “Where have you been?”, fumed the Farmer’s Market assistant director, as she was sweeping up a pile of vegetable refuse. In the next breath, she said “Oh, that’s right, you moved to Texas to be with family,” At that point, I woke up and realized it was the day for Farmer’s Market, alright, but I was going to the Plano market-and I am not a volunteer there, The vendors all have their own tents and chairs, which they keep with them. There is no set-up/breakdown crew here, as there is in Prescott.

I read the newsletter from Prescott Farmers Market, so I know they are doing well and have a sizeable group of volunteers. Threads of nostalgia come every so often-and mostly in dreams. It seems like a healthy way for good memories to intertwine with a good feeling about my life here.

A Navy colleague of Aram’s stopped by this afternoon, with some of his family members. Turns out they live in West, TX, which is one of the places I visited on my first real Texas jaunt, in 2012. The place where they live now is a stone’s throw from the site of the fertilizer plant explosion that devastated the town in April, 2013. The town has recovered quite well from that tragedy. This is just another thread that keeps me connected to places that helped me re-establish my sense of equilibrium, after losing my wife.

At one point, this evening, there were ten of us in the house: Our family of four, the four visitors from West and two HVAC workers, who were on the last portion of the installation of a new heating and cooling unit. Hana had never seen this many people together in the house, and was actually quite happy. She smiled broadly at the visitors, while being uncharacteristically quiet. She is usually quite vocal, when we are sitting around, or when she is involved in an activity.

The threads of belonging are fashioning another fine quilt-like the ones in Arizona,in the Northeast, in the Philippines, in Canada and in parts of Europe.

Whose Voice?

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Community, Family, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 21, 2026- My family had a brief “conversation”, between the three of them, about going out for a brisk walk after the adult dinner. Hana had the veto poser, since it was intended for her benefit. She “spoke” her opinion and essentially wanted to stay in. It’d been raining most of the day, and she was hungry, besides (She usually has a feeding just before bedtime). They stayed in, she had her feeding, then quietly went to bed. Mom and Dad relaxed in the family room and had a much-needed private conversation on another matter. I stayed out of both situations.

Earlier, there was some discussion about an enterprising rabbit, which was trying to collapse the cover over our lettuce patch. Aram chased it off, as I would have. While he, as property owner, has the final say in how wild animals and birds are tolerated on the property, I would focus mainly on keeping the small garden safe and leave the rest to be grazed. It saves on mowing.

People in Virginia narrowly approved a redistricting proposal that could be used to favour one party over another. The cities and suburbs voted “Yes” and rural areas, “No”. I am personally against any gerrymandering and if Texas ever came up with such a referendum, I would be a naysayer, for the simple fact that I believe every citizen of voting age should have an equal voice. I think the Legislatures should also stay out of it, and an Independent Redistricting body, in each state, should do the honours.

Basically, my take is that each person deserves empowerment, commensurate with their developmental level, from Day One. If one can understand the matter and have good reason for their opinion, then he/she should have a say. A full range of voices brings out the fuller truth.

What I’ve Done Lately

5
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 18, 2026- The out-of-the-blue critic questioned whether I have done anything “today” for women and girls. I answered. matter-of-factly, because when someone addresses me by name, my idea of courtesy is to acknowledge what seems to be their concern. My career, protecting and educating children and teenagers aside, what I am doing NOW is to help raise a little girl to be forthright, to articulate and follow her dreams and to grow into a woman of character and strength-like her mother and maternal grandmother, like her paternal grandmother, like her great grandmothers,

That will likely mean little to the ideologue who spent too much time worrying about what a man she’s never met-and is unlikely to ever encounter-does to help womankind. Actions are never enough for someone whose anger, mindset, life experiences create a blindness that would take years of counterbalancing to relieve.

So, I consider the comment that I made, on a longtime friend’s site, about narcissists not having anyone to blame but themselves, for whatever lack of success they may have in finding a mate. Even after pondering the critic’s remarks, I hold fast to that conviction-and do not regard it as making excuses for anyone’s bad behaviour. Narcissism is a condition, not a dodge; just as, for me, autism is a condition, but does not give me a free pass to conduct myself in an untoward manner.

I will carry on, tomorrow, and for years to come, helping my granddaughter embrace life to the fullest. I will stand beside, and help, other women and girls, whenever time allows and in the manner that they request. I will address statements and actions stemming from misogyny, to the best of my ability. I will not, however, be a slave to the loudest voices in the room. One size does not fit all, and mere ideology fits few, if any.

Progress

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 17,2026- My chiropractor saw a fair amount of progress, in the loosening up of vertebrae that had been tight after my slipping on ice, in late January. It’s nice to be on track to be where I was, spine-wise, in December of last year. My overall medical state is excellent and a dental check-up will happen soon, under new auspices.

Hana is making progress of her own, building on her mobility skills. She is also very good at making her needs known-and this afternoon, while I was “burping” her, after a feeding, she spat up some and it got on my shoulder. She immediately pulled her head off my shoulder and fussed at me until I actually noticed the spots, a few seconds later. She notices changes in furniture and in what one of us is wearing. Not having much language yet, her visual focus tells the story.

Aram and Yunhee are each solving problems, in their respective job sites. The cybersecurity and logistics industries are lucky to have such proactive and dedicated workers. That’s not just me being prejudiced; each of them is working past hours, putting the actual task in front of them as the criterion for when to stop. on a given day.

On a wider level, humanity is making more progress towards solving various environmental problems. It may not be universal, by a long shot, but National Geographic has identified 33 people who are actively making inroads into specific problems, from ocean health to climate-friendly housing. Some of these folks are famous: Harrison Ford, Russell Westbrook, Stella McCartney and Shailene Woodley. Others, like Francis Kere and Lauren Eatwell, are bound to become well-known, for their efforts.

May your own efforts at improving your family’s and community’s well-being likewise make a difference, as the days roll by!

Reading

2
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Education, Family, Literary criticism, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 16,2026– As part of my activities with Hana, I read to her for 15-20 minutes, each post-feeding session, before I put her on the mat for her stretching and crawling practice. I have read her a few small cloth books and several small picture books. Around the time she reached three months, I started reading “Heidi”, by Johanna Spyri. It was one of the books that Penny had as a child. Hana pays attention quite well, especially when I change my voice for different characters, like the mercurial but loving Grandfather or the sullen but efficient Fraulein Rottenmeier.

I hope to impart to her a love of the printed word, both as a listener and as a reader. I learned to read basic words around age four, and mastered phonetics by the age of six. Aram was able to read by the age of five. Hana focuses on the words that are on some of the t-shirts I wear around the house, and I tell her what they say, several times a day, when we are together. When she is able to sit without assistance, I will start introducing letter cards and familiarizing her with the sounds associated with each letter.

Around age two, I hope to start introducing short words on cards, and have her repeat the sounds. Of course the read aloud activities will continue, even after she starts pre-school. I look forward to talking with her about the books we read-what she likes and dislikes about the book; who her favourite and not favourite characters are and why. Most importantly, I want to encourage her to think about what is read.

The printed word has been, in many ways, a medium that kept me grounded, while at the same time expanding my horizons. I wish the same for my grandchild.

Comfort

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 14, 2026- Both my son and daughter-in-law work from home, most days. Hana knows when her mother is in the office, which is across the hall from the living room, where her play mat is located. For several days now, she has been getting frustrated at reaching the end of the play mat and having to turn around and army crawl back the other way. I finally figured it out, this afternoon. She wanted to try and crawl to her mother’s office. It would involve going on a section of carpet, then up onto the wooden foyer and over to the office. I deflected her. Instead, she got to sit in the office for about ten minutes, until she was getting too chatty while her mother was on a conference call. It was okay that I took her back out. She had been able to have a little time, realized her goal, and felt comfort.

A little bit later, some heating/cooling technicians came by, and fixed some duct work issues that had left us feeling like we were living in a sweat lodge. It hasn’t been too hot outside, so the fix is a proactive one-given that we can expect several days of 100 + F temperatures, between late May and September. The four of us will now have comfort. We will also save on energy costs.

The second most important thing I can do for my family, right now, is to provide some relief for Aram and Yunhee, in household maintenance, as much as possible- especially in keeping the kitchen and bathrooms clean and the yard in order. It is in the interests of all four of us, that they not feel overwhelmed by the trifecta of job, parenting and home. I remember all too well how that felt. There is no shame in providing a fair amount of comfort.

Meticulous

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 13, 2026- The semiannual check-up began an hour late, and lasted two hours. The late start was due to the doctor spending an extra hour with the patient before me. When I came in, he spent the first hour going over my experience with Prescott VA, then spent an hour going over my recent lab results, and explaining his position on a certain medication. During that time, we each ate our lunch items, while he meticulously went over my vitals, which he found quite good. The one area that he found could improve, is the focus of the medication he is prescribing. Otherwise, he feels I am on track for a reasonable longevity. Suffice it to say, this physician is easily the most thorough and knowledgeable medical professional I have consulted since I left Phoenix.

Hana had a surprise of her own, this morning. I had to answer Nature’s call, while I was working with her on her army crawling, so I put her on her back, on the mat, did my business and came back a minute later. She had turned over and was back to army crawling, on her own. She repeated this same action, this evening, when her mother set her down and put something in the next room. The little girl has a very strong drive to build her developmental skills. She is also quite systematic, already, in how she goes about her activity.

Aram went around the house, this evening, and catalogued all the points that I will need to go over, with some workmen who will be here tomorrow, regarding the heating and cooling system, and a few peripheral issues. He is getting out in front of the potential heat waves that are bound to come in a month or two. My son has grown into a meticulous man, though I saw the seeds of that early on, even when he was a middle school student. He would want to go back over certain material, two or three times.

I am getting the sense that now the key to good health and well-being lies in careful attention to detail. I find that most gratifying.

True Blue

0
Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 11, 2026- The penultimate speaker, in this evening’s memorial to the late Baha’i teacher, Glenford Mitchell, began by noting that the hour was getting late, and saying he would be brief. He then went on for ten minutes. No reminiscence about Mr.Mitchell could ever be ever be brief, though he himself was the model of brevity, in his talks and speeches. He simply meant too much, to too many people.

I sat for the live-streamed broadcast of this memorial because of the tenor of Mr. Mitchell’s work. An early founder of the Student Nonviolent Coordinating Council (“Snick”) and co-author of “The Angry Black South” (1962), he became enamoured of the Teachings of Baha’ullah, first taught him by his paternal uncle, in his native Jamaica and coming again to the fore of his heart while he lived in Raleigh, NC as a student at Shaw University. Glenford threw himself more fully into Baha’i work and by dint of his devotion and work ethic, was elected to one Baha’i administrative body after another, serving fourteen years on the National Spiritual Assembly of the Baha’is of the United States, then twenty-six years on the Faith’s Supreme Body: The Universal House of Justice.

In his later years, Mr. Mitchell’s health declined, but his spirit kept on and he continued to welcome friends and family to his home, even if he could no longer walk or speak. His wife and family stood by him, and saw that his declining years were not those of misery. Glenford Mitchell’s spirit remained true blue-even through his passing on February 7.

Randy Smith, who also passed on recently, served the Baha’i Faith in Washington State and in Prescott Valley, AZ, for nearly thirty years. I knew Randy, and his wife, Linda, as steadfast, long-suffering community servants, in the Prescott area. Others recall the same about them, in the Olympia and Longview areas.Randy was most often found in his shop/garage, attached to the family home. He welcomed neighbours, including youths, who were either interested in his various projects or who simply wanted to borrow tools. He also spent long hours with his grandchildren, either when the family came up from the Phoenix area or when he and Linda went down there for a visit.

Randy was a quiet man, who shunned the limelight, but he was most often the first to arrive at a gathering, and one of the last to leave. Making sure a job was complete was his trademark. If that involved learning a new skill, well, that was a natural outgrowth of his upbringing in Ketchikan, at the southeastern tip of Alaska. Randy was also true blue.

It was my good fortune to have become familiar with Mr. Mitchell’s life and work and to have known Randy as a personal friend. May there more people who show themselves, like the scholar and the tradesman, as True Blue.