The Hana Chronicles: Month 5, Day 25

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June 15,2026– It was a relatively cool day today, and Hana did not need to be shielded from the sun, but I put her sun visor atop her head anyway. We had a nice walk along the west spur of Chester Drive, and back. I will walk again, solo, after writing this post. It’s a pleasant evening.

Several writers have recently spoken of what makes them feel at home. The term “emotional home” was used in one such post, written by someone who has lived in three different countries, for an extended period of time. He sees each of them as an emotional home, for different reasons.

I have lived in several communities, 18, in fact-mostly in the Unites States, but also in Viet Nam and South Korea. I have only been in one place I positively loathed. All other places had saving graces-even when the job I held was not all that wonderful.

Were I to think of emotional homes, I am more inclined to conjure up regions, with some special places within them, that secure my sense of well-being. Here are five such areas:

New England- Here, I was born, grew to a semblance of maturity and became immersed in the love of forest and ocean. Massachusetts and Maine are my primary emotional homes, within the region. It was always to Saugus and the North Shore that I went, when it was time to be with family. There are places, some no longer as they were when I frequented them and some that will never change all that much. It is along the rocky shore that I feel most at home there: Nahant, anywhere on Cape Ann, Marginal Way, Green Acre, Boothbay Harbor,Mount Desert Island, There are forested, mountainous areas that bring a sense of my ancestors’ presence: Breakheart, Blue Hills, Mount Katahdin, the Berkshires,the environs of Jackman. No mention of the region can leave out New Hampshire: Hampton Beach, Portsmouth, Lake Winnepesaukee, Franconia Notch. New England is my emotional tap root.

The Southwest- California to Texas, north to Colorado and Nevada. My sense of well-being was cemented in the vast expanses of desert, mountain, beach towns and rolling prairie. Here I became focused, found true love and strong Faith, bid farewell to my first and most faithful darling and have greeted her namesake. Here, I became truly affirmed. Arizona was the center piece, bringing me into the worlds of the Dineh and the Hopi, the campesinos and the cowboys, the self-reliant and the co-operative. The mountains and canyons always brought solace, even when they also brought challenge: Prescott, Williams,Flagstaff, Bisbee, Kayenta, Superior, Globe, Chinle- all were welcoming and surrounded by soothing Nature. Five trips down to the river and back, in the courses of single days, drove home the majesty of the Grand Canyon. Black Canyon and Prescott Circle, Canyon de Chelly, Monument Valley, Boyce Thompson, the Bisbee Staircase Challenge, Lockett Meadow, Mount Humphreys, Mount Elden, Bellemont- these were my tonics. Across the region, San Diego,the OC beaches, Carson City, Glenwood Springs, Santa Fe, Manitou Springs, Amarillo/Palo Duro Canyon and the little towns of the Northwest Passage to DFW Metroplex are the stars along the galactic path. Plano is my anchor now, linking all that is sacred from my past with the still bright promise of years to come.

East Asia- South Korea and the Philippines, nearly two thousand miles apart, with Taiwan and Hong Kong as intermediaries, brought both the smoothing of my rough edges and a sense that I was worth a lot more than I had previously realized. I began to take stock of myself, and value professionalism, in Korea. I learned to again truly treasure human companionship, on three visits to Manila and beyond. Jeju will always be the northwestward-pointing branch and Makati, the southwestern. In Korea, I was brought into the wider family of humankind. In Manila, I was reminded that I still have the capacity to love a woman fully. Though time and circumstance have kept us apart, there will never be a time when I don’t treasure her for all she is.

Canada– The opposite ends of this vast nation are two points of my North Star. Nova Scotia and Newfoundland also helped me smooth some remaining rough edges, and re-orient my thinking, so that reaching goals previously thought unreachable became mind over matter. Vancouver Island and the Sunshine Coast reinforced those notions. Montreal, even in an occasion of severe mental tests, is the soul center, the heart of this North Star. On both coasts of Canada, my main connection was with First Nations people, and I was brought home to my own Abenaki roots, again and again.

Europe– Family of long ago flashed before me. Friends, long kept in abeyance, became real again. Suffering, in opposite areas of the central heartland, (Auschwitz-Birkenau and Srebrenica) was shown to me, in graphic detail, decades after the unspeakable horrors had transpired. Kindness, basic decency, were everywhere along the way-from Iceland, through Sweden, and on a winding path to Croatia and Bosnia-Hercegovina, thence on another winding path to the British Isles. There was the expectation that I show common sense and not expect any favours. I found that refreshing and rewarding. In Nynashamn, Split, Sarajevo, Salzburg, Vienna, Heidelberg, Fishguard, Wexford, Edinburgh and Findhorn, I felt like I was among family. Europe is the Conscience Beam of my heart house.

There are friends in all these places. I still hear from some. Others, i may not see or hear from until we meet in the Light. Neither they, nor the emotional strength I derived from our friendships, will be cast aside. I hope to acquaint Hana-and any siblings she may yet have, with some of these Emotional Homes, and places that lie between them. We walk in Beauty.

The Hana Chronicles: Month 5, Day 24

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June 14,2026- Hana was shown a new puzzle today. It has wooden farm animals and a barn, which fit into spaces that also show a picture of each piece where it should go. She likes to take the pieces out of the puzzle. I will work with her, during the week, to associate one piece at a time with its proper spot, and try to get her to place it in that spot.

It was a nice quiet day for us, once her father got home early, after drill was concluded due to a power outage. That worked out nicely for Hana, who got that much more time to play with her Daddy. It would be too easy to figure that a pre-lingual child doesn’t miss a loved one, but we all know better-and besides, her parents miss her, too, during the week.

It rained hard, early this morning, but by 11, I was able to go and grab lunch for the three of us at Saved by the Bagel. Hana enjoyed beef and rice, with a side of pumpkin, all pureed, of course. We adults had cheeseburgers on bagels.

I read a memory that a friend had posted about my visit to his city, some years back. He has since married and moved to his wife’s town. When I next travel in that direction, I will be sure to pay them a visit. For the foreseeable future, though, I am happy where I am.

The Hungarian writer, Peter Dosa, has written of his emotional homes: Hungary,where he was born; Ireland, where he was raised and Barcelona, where he matured and where he still lives. I will offer a similar summation in tomorrow’s post.

The Hana Chronicles: Month 5, Day 9

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May 30, 2026- Today was the original Memorial Day, nee Decoration Day-when people would adorn their loved ones’ graves with flowers and other tokens of remembrance. After World War II, the name changed, unofficially. This was given Congressional approval in 1968. Even before the official change, at school in the 1950s, we would assemble and collectively recite a poem that began: “Tomorrow is Memorial Day. The soldiers will be marching, with banners waving high..” On this day, we think of what can be done for the greater good of humanity, while also focusing on the individuals in our families who have gone on, many having made the ultimate sacrifice/

Somehow, this brought me to think of both the larger and smaller things that are of importance in life, and in turn, the notion that our lives dovetail between concern with the greater good (“Macro”) and the small details and niceties (“Micro”). It’s a given, in today’s world, that things can increase in number and size, without end, and become smaller in the same manner. Whole numbers have no limit; neither do fractions. There are an infinite number of celestial bodies in the Universe, and there are an as yet unknown number of reductions that can be made in subatomic particles.

All this further made me look at how the phases of my life have dovetailed between Micro and Macro. As a child and teenager, my day to day concerns were with my family and the town of Saugus. Yet there was also an awareness of the wider world, and my interests ranged from the natural history of the planet to the quality of life for people in other parts of the world.

In my twenties, I turned fairly inward, not really letting anyone in and basically going through the motions of military service, college and the beginnings of my teaching career. In my thirties and forties, the focus turned outward again-a change in Faith, marriage, and dedication to a life of service, plus raising a child. In my fifties, the focus was Micro again-taking care of my wife, in her declining years, and ridding myself of negative thoughts and feelings about myself. From age 60 until last December, the focus was Macro again- a wide field of community service and lots of travel, both domestic and international-with a view towards expanding my network of friends.

Now, the focus is again largely Micro-my primary concern being the well-being and development of my granddaughter, Hana. It is also a hybrid life: In being a role model for her, I am gradually expanding my network here in Plano and the Dallas-Fort Worth Metro area. It will be important for her to see that these old bones still carry some weight. My network of friends and family across the continent, and the globe, also remains intact. Visits with them are in abeyance, but not finished. As my family’s life evolves, so will mine.

The Hana Chronicles: Month 5, Day 6

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May 27,2026- I took a walk this evening. It was the first real solo walk that I’ve taken in months. I’ve been on short jaunts to Hoblitzelle Park with my family. yet these were done according to someone else’s schedule and at a pace set by others. My most satisfying steps have always been taken at my own pace-neither halting nor frenetic, but steady. That was true of hikes in Arizona and elsewhere. It’s true here in Plano, and thereabouts. It is what will keep me alive and well.

When I moved from Phoenix to Prescott, the door to regeneration had blown wide open. So, I took in nearly every natural space in the Prescott area, gradually widening my circle. There was someone whose point of view was that hikes don’t count, if one has to drive to the trailhead. I chose to ignore that particular admonition. My regeneration, after eleven years of caretaking, of watching the love of my life fade away, could stand no boundaries. I was a veritable Waldo, for a few years-sans the red-striped shirt and stocking cap. Fifty eight hiking trails, forty-eight states and twenty other countries later, that part of my resilience was well-established.

There was one part of me that waited: Who will be walking in my place, thirty, forty, fifty years from now? That question was answered, at least in part, in 1988, with the birth of my son, and was underscored in December of last year, when my first grandchild burst on scene.

For five months, though I have made forays around Plano and to surrounding towns in my car, most of my time has been spent cocooning, keeping my focus on Hana. That aspect of life will be even more pre-eminent, starting next week, when her mother starts a new job that will take her out of the house, five days a week. I will be Hana’s sole adult presence during the workweek.

This, however, brings about the need for an uptick in her daily routine-and walks in the stroller will be the first adjustment. I will be getting a car seat installed in Sportage, and short hops to the Public Library, for puppet shows and story time, will happen as the months roll by. Hana’s world continues to evolve and for me, there is a fifth regeneration.

Worlds Within A World, Part VI

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May 19,2026- My granddaughter, Hana, has taken to spinning a couple of little wheels on her multi-level “School House” toy. She likes to press the colour and shape buttons on another toy, and is trying to figure out how to push the tiny “Menu” lever. That would put some snappy music on, but she doesn’t seem sure how she feels about snappy music. She can listen to it for a few minutes, then looks at me and says “Not”. She blows kisses at us, and carries a wiper cloth around with her, as she is crawling, then wipes her mouth, if there is any spittle. She laughs heartily, sometimes at a silly story one of us is reading. (I think she is good at reading our faces, as well, and laughs along with us. She will be five months old on Thursday.

Plano world began on January 2,2026, when I moved my necessary belongings into the comfortable home that I share with Hana and her parents-my son and daughter-in-law. I kept everything else in storage. Plano world is small, even more so than Low Desert world was, while I was Penny’s caregiver. but not as small as Saugus world. Tending to Hana’s needs, when her parents are otherwise occupied, is my raison d’etre. There are, though, some Baha’i activities and Red Cross Blood Donor Ambassador shifts-the former mostly in the evenings and the latter on weekends only. I visit Plano Farmers Market, on Saturday mornings, but there is no need for volunteers there, so I just buy what attracts me. There are a few coffee shops, restaurants and book shops that I go to, now and then. Mostly, though, my granddaughter, and her parents, are my life.

Son asked me, some time ago, whether I wanted to keep certain items in my car-for when I travel. This Sagittarian has no plans for travel-at least until October, and that will depend on Hana’s needs and her parents’ work situations. If I have two weeks to myself, I will go either east or west. If I don’t have that time, it’ll suffice to enjoy the growth of my precious little girl.

It’s different now. I still correspond with a dear friend in the Philippines and with several others, across the continent and across the globe. It all feels so far away, though. Even Arizona, so embedded in my heart for so many years, feels like another planet; thus, my series being entitled as it is. Prescott felt like that at first, then I threw myself wholly into the community and into traveling. As Hana grows, there may well be an expansion of Plano world-but we’ll see..

Worlds Within A World, Part V

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May 18, 2026- Mom once said, a boy becomes a man at forty. In my case, it was more like sixty-five.

As my son left for Navy Basic Training, at Great Lakes, north of Chicago, I determined that I would set out for parts unknown. I found that I had a flat tire, so that impulse faded and I went back to the Phoenix house. Two weeks later, I packed what I needed and drove to the family house in Prescott. I spent a few days, then went back and gave away five extended cab pickup loads to Goodwill. My auto body mechanic, Bill, all 6’9″ of him, hauled the stuff away, for $300 and my rocking chair. I loaded a few more boxes with me to take to Prescott, but before I closed up the Phoenix house and drove off, the place had one last hook to sink into me: When I turned off the washing machine faucets, the cold water valve broke. I managed to get to the shutoff bib, before too much water had leaked, but there was drywall that needed replacing, as well as the valve. I bartered with my landscaper, who lived down the street and was willing to do the work: The washer and dryer, a freezer and $200 worth of tools. I left the house keys with him and drove on up to Prescott.

Prescott world (2011-25) was the longest I lived in any one town since Saugus. I would go back and forth to Phoenix, until the sale closed, in 2013, but how I recovered and where, was all on me. I took to the road, a fair number of times, going back to the East Coast at least once a year, often twice. California, Nevada and the Pacific Northwest became regular haunts. I managed to re-visit every state, except Montana and North Dakota, plus several parts of Canada. The Philippines nearly became a second home, and I returned to South Korea for the wedding of Aram and Yunhee. I made it to Europe twice, visiting sixteen countries. Any one of those places could feel like home, and there were parts that did. Prescott, and Arizona, were always a delight to which to return. I devoted myself to hikes, both long and short, as well as soaking up the history of the Grand Canyon State.

Community service filled my days: Paid service in the form of substitute teaching and sweat equity, in Baha’i activities, at the Farmers Market, the Red Cross, Solid Rock’s soup kitchen, various events held by Slow Food- Prescott and a few activities of the American Legion. I paid back all the kindness that the town and surrounding area had shown us in 1992 and 2000-01. Most important, though, was that I regained the self-respect that had been bled from me, during the long period in the desert. I stood up to grifters and thugs, at least five times, during my time in Prescott, acquiring more stamina in the process.

I bid farewell to my mother, both of my in-laws and a fair number of extended family and friends, during this time. Each one gone, though, just made a place in my heart-so that it got bigger. I fell in love again, and might have even sought to re-marry, but for the birth of my beloved granddaughter. This event put an end to Prescott world and opened yet another phase. Plano world began on New Year’s Day.

Worlds Within A World, Part II

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May 15,2026- From the Saugus world, I got a work ethic, respect for family and tradition, a sense of place. From the Army world, I got self-discipline and awareness that people everywhere are more alike than different. From the College world, I got respect for my female peers and a sense of personal independence. From the Maine world, I got the joy of making it through a few harsh winters, and savouring delightful summers, yet I also came to the realization that not all who work with children have their best interests at heart.

After Maine came the Arizona Central Corridor world (1978-1981)-which brought me first to a private boarding school in Eloy, then to Northern Arizona University, Flagstaff. During this time, I made peace with Mathematics, for many years my bugbear, and for two years at the Villa School, my livelihood. I know that, out of my own struggles, there came an affinity with those in my classes who were having a hard time with the concepts. It made me a credible teacher. I came to see troubled teens as worthy of respect. It made me a better human being. I came to see, and know, the majesty of Arizona, and made the acquaintance of the Pacific coast, as far north as Portland and as far south as Guaymas. I went across country, by bus or by thumb, three times.

The Flagstaff years brought the first real sea change in my life-realizing that my globalist self had counterparts in the Baha’i Faith, which I adopted as my own, early in 1981.I met the woman I would marry, waited out her sorting of her life and tossed aside a major obstacle in mine-saying goodbye to alcoholic beverages. I lost a few friends, but made hundreds more-and found myself oriented towards our country’s First Nations.

The firt Navajo-Hopi world (1981-86) put my newly acquired Masters Degree, in Education (Counseling), to full use. Tuba City, on the western edge of Arizona’s Painted Desert, struck me as close to being a Third World place. There were, at the time, a couple of trading posts and several small cafes. While I was there, a grocery store and small mini mall opened up. The small cafes gave way to well-appointed restaurants. I married Penny, we went on Pilgrimage to Israel and the West Bank, getting a fine guided tour of Jerusalem, the Jordan Valley and the Galilee from a retired IDF officer. We spent nine days total in the Holy Land, six of these in Haifa and Akka, There may never be such a consecrated time as this again in my life, but it gave me a foundation to go forward. We would stop in London, for three days, afterward, and I would have the bounty of speaking before people of whom I was in awe. We also would attend a Council Fire of First Nations, in Alberta, teach the Baha’i Faith in Houston, in Guyana and on the Omaha and Pine Ridge Reservations, as well as keeping the home fires burning on the Navajo and Hopi Nations. We buried a good friend in Tuba City and we buried my father, a year after he and Mom had visited us and toured Arizona.

A phone call, in the early morning hours, in January, 1986, was the inception of Korea world (1986-92) That, and the second Navajo-Hopi world (1992-98) will make up Part III..

Worlds Within A World, Part I

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May 14, 2026- When I was serving in VietNam, my mates referred to the United States as “The World”. It was obvious that this was a euphemism, that the consensus was our homeland was, in effect, the place that mattered above all else. Our world was where family, closest friends and, for many, their sweethearts were waiting.

I have always been a globalist, seeing the people of other nations as having equal importance to me and mine, in the bigger picture. Yet, as I look at my life thus far, periods of time can be centered on a particular place, for a given number of years. Thus these 75 years have seen the following worlds.

The Saugus world (1950-1969)- Although I was born, and lived my first six months, in nearby Melrose, most of my growing up years were spent living in two houses in Saugus, Massachusetts. My wanderlust primarily saw me going around different neighbourhoods of the town, or to neighbouring Lynn. Mashpee, on Cape Cod, and the area between North Conway and Franconia, NH were part of the Saugus World, as they were our family vacation haunts. Other places in eastern Massachusetts, New Hampshire and southern Maine were gradually added to my world-with Boston only entering the list in 1964, when I went with my father on the Freedom Trail. Camping, hiking and body surfing became my idea of fun during the Saugus years. I connected with a small group of neighbourhood kids, was in my share of scraps, had crushes on girls and attempted to attend college, then dabbled in factory work-neither of which my unfocused mind met with success.

The Army world (1969-72)- Training for, and working in, postal work took me away from Saugus. Home was, successively, in Fort Jackson, SC; Fort Benjamin Harrison, IN; Fort Myer, VA; Long Binh and Cholon, VN. I was happiest when on the job, then. I had a few close buddies, but mostly kept to myself. During training, I stayed put, save for a “Most Improved Trainee” weekend pass to Myrtle Beach, SC and a few weekend nights in Columbia and Indianapolis. While in Fort Myer, I became well-acquainted with Washington, DC and learned the train and air shuttle routes between Washington and Boston. Viet Nam obviously was a constricted period, though I took R&R in Sydney for a few days and enjoyed a day in Vung Tau, a beach town near Saigon.

The College World (1972-76)- Once out of the Army, I was more focused and completed Associates and Baccalaureate work, living the first two years again mostly in Saugus, save a brief residence in Beverly, near the campus of North Shore Community College. During this time, I went on a week’s road trip to Prince Edward Island, went to Montreal and Quebec Ville, three or four times, worked several part-time jobs and hit the club scene way too often. I lived in and around the University of Massachusetts-Amherst, for the last two years of this period. Northampton and South Deerfield replaced the Orchard Hill dorms as home, during my last 1 1/2 years of school.

The Maine world (1976-78)- Not all of my life decisions have been good ones. After graduating college and substitute teaching in Saugus and North Reading, with limited success, I went back to a resort in Maine, where I had worked two years earlier. Life at Quisisana was maudlin at best, but I made busing tables a focus and the summer passed nicely. At summer’s end, with no job prospects in eastern Massachusetts and no real attachment to the Amherst area, I went north, to Bangor, as it was near Orono, where I had paternal relatives,and an ancestral connection in Old Town. There was a young lady to whom I was drawn, but it fizzled quickly. I got a small tutoring gig, then a job teaching Emotionally Disabled middle schoolers, followed, the next year by a stint as Title I Tutor. Bangor, Brewer and Dexter were my anchor towns, Etna-Dixmont School paid the bills and the mountains near Kingfield were my solace. I explored all parts of Maine and a good chunk of New Brusnwick, during this time.

After my second year of treading water, it was time to move along. Arizona beckoned, and thus came another world.

Magical Thinking

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May 7, 2026- Hana pushes herself to reach certain places on her crawling mat, but was showing a bit of frustration at being limited to the same route, day after day. It was time for another segment, so down went the multi-modal quilt, with its alphabet, colour bar, shapes and illustrations of animals and objects. This doubled the area that she has to navigate, and she took to it right away.

My granddaughter had been acting as if she should be able to go through walls or pieces of furniture, getting frustrated at this also, so Papa has the task of gently encouraging her to turn, when confronted with a barrier. I even showed her that my almighty self can’t go through a wall, which she found amusing, while getting the point.

Many of the old stories I am reading her now, European fairy tales, present magical solutions to harrowing scenes. I choose to focus more on the character-building elements that are embedded in the tales, rather than the amazing feats of derring do. It only touches a slight level of her consciousness, of course, but I can recall, from my own toddlerhood, having a sense that I had heard stories that pointed the way to correctness, even earlier in my life. So, we go down this path together, She will retain what sticks in her mind and re-learn the rest later.

Much magical thinking comes from being used to having certain things happen almost instantaneously- like fast food being prepared and served in minutes, or AI popping up with answers to questions, in mere seconds. Another friend, examining the matter, points out that experiencing something, even several times, does not mean that it will be integrated with one’s psyche or behavioural repertoire. “I spent a week in Sweden” hardly qualifies me to claim any more than cursory knowledge of the country and its people. “I changed the spark plugs in my Ford LTD, back in 1975”, does not make me anywhere near a skilled auto mechanic. It is integration, not encountering, that determines the level of any change one wishes to see in life.

There is also a larger process at work, sometimes called “the arc of history” and in other forums, “the Major Plan of God”. We on the ground can only understand a smidgen of it, but here’s the thing: Just as a motor vehicle can go either forward or in reverse, it moves most efficiently forward. Reverse is meant only for short distances, like backing out of a parking space, or going a few yards back to where a loved one is waiting to communicate a last-minute thought. Going backwards in society can only be temporary, mostly to correct errors made in moving ahead too quickly. It cannot be done with a view towards reinstating the “Golden Days of Yesteryear”.

I will have more to say about this in an upcoming post.

Clean Tools

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March 9, 2026- The City of Plano hauled away a large pile of cut branches, from Saturday’s storm. The haul took place bright and early this morning. It was a good second day of daylight savings time. It saved me the trouble of sorting the branches into piles.

My only remaining task from yesterday was thus cleaning the chainsaw. That brought a trip to Lowe’s, for bar and chain oil, an awl for cleaning the bar reservoir and microfiber cloths for wiping te tool clean. I also got a special oil for the battery posts, to be applied before the next use.

I am quite fastidious about cleaning tools after using them-and that goes for appliances as well. Cleaning the washing machine, dryer, dishwasher and yes, even my laptop-which does tend to get dusty, has its place in the scheme of things. If I could just get around to washing the windows……

Housecleaning can apply to countries, as well. The President of Mexico brought up a good point-that we in the U.S. work on our addictions, before wanting to solve the problems of her country-and others. It is not rocket science to determine that American weaponry is being used by drug cartels to provide “security” for drug shipments that support American addictions. Europe has similar problems, but they tend to work on their own issues, before, say, sending troops to Africa to deal with that continent’s drug traffickers. One thing I noticed, in travels through Canada in 2022-2024, the Philippines, over the past three years and Europe, last year, is that the police forces in those areas are quite on point, when it comes to busting drug dealers and gangs. Many parts of the U.S. do their jobs well also.

We do best, though, by dealing with the tough parts of our own issues first, before wanting to invade Mexico or indulge in regime change elsewhere. People in most countries have agency. Don’t take that away from them.