Category Archives: collaborating

Well-Tended

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 27, 2026- My four-month dental check-up and cleaning, by a new provider, touched all the bases that the team at Desert Dental, in Phoenix, did for thirteen years. New Bite is our family’s dental care provider, so I helped Aram get a small sign-up bonus, and I get one as well. The practice is state-of-the art, checking sinuses and thyroid, as well as teeth, tongue, gums and jaws. I will be well-tended.

Hana had her four-month physical this morning and is on track in all her growth areas. This morning, she greeted me with “Hi” and when I asked her if she had a good sleep, she answered “Yeah”. It happened that she slept through the night, so things are going well, for her and for Mom and Dad.

The house is far more comfortable now, then it was last week, before the HVAC work. There is still a little left to straighten out, here and there, but we should be in good shape for the height of summer. The three of us share every task pretty much equally. Whoever comes upon something that needs doing, does it first. I even whipped up some pancakes, yesterday morning, like my Dad used to do on Sundays. Yunhee covered the lettuce bed with a “critter proof” mesh, so the rabbits will take what is theirs and leave our greens alone.

The country can be well-tended, if people work together. A few days ago, the governing body of the Baha’i Faith in the United States, our National Spiritual Assembly, put forth a reasonable call to action. I leave you with a link to this document, in the hopes that it might inspire some to take concerted action of their own, for the good of the nation-and of the planet.

https://www.acommonendeavor.org/

The Knowing

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 26, 2026- Virginia Roberts Giuffre died a year ago today. In that year, halting progress has been made in finding justice for her, and the thousands of other victims in the Epstein Network. There is a long way to go. In that year, justice was found for Gisele Pelicot, as 51 males were found guilty of raping her, while she was drugged by her then husband. In that year, CNN brought a “mainstream” website to light-it being openly called “Motherless.com-Rape Academy”, viewed over 62,000,000 times. In that year, serial abusers from across the political spectrum were called out-even one, Cesar Chavez, who is long dead.

I have shared a Substack post about the meaning of the term, “motherless”, on Facebook, and can only hope it gets read and taken seriously. I was raised by an exemplary mother. The idea of denigrating her infuriates me. I would have done anything she asked, even though I was a difficult child at times. My son was raised by an exemplary mother. He treasures her memory to this day, even though he was a difficult child at times.

I don’t know many openly misogynistic men, but many men I do know have areas in which to grow-as do I. Suffice it to say, those who hate women also harbour self-loathing. Many tell themselves otherwise, weaving fantasies of greatness and irresistability. They project themselves as monumental figures, as men of consequence, legends in their own time.

I once was deep among them, always wondering why I had no success in finding a mate. When I did find a woman to love, it was only because I had begun to rein myself in, take stock of my behaviour and put sexuality in its place-not as the be-all of life but as one aspect of a committed relationship. My wife initiated the process of my maturation. It took until she passed on, for that maturation to fully take root.

All those who viewed “Rape Academy”, and took its misguided message to heart, are only fooling themselves, damaging their own lives and those of any women hapless enough to become their victims. Humans, our animal form aside, are primarily spiritual beings. What one does to another person, to another sentient being, even to another life form, affects the spirit. It is not a matter of Heaven or Hell, but a matter of behaviour and consequence. Some of those men who have been publicly exposed as rapists and abusers have also done good, even great, acts for the betterment of humanity. Yet, in the end, Christ’s admonition-“Whatsoever you do to the least of my brethren, that you do unto Me”- refers as much to the harm we do others as it does to what we do that is of help.

The physical, however enticing and pleasurable it may be, is as nothing in the eternal realm. Power, the driving force behind most rape, does not carry over into the next world, but the lessons one must learn in this life are put off by the reckless pursuit of power-and must be learned, with considerably more difficulty, in the next.

Growth can come only with the Knowing, and its practical application to life.

Recaptured

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving, Technical stuff

April 23, 2026- I regained access to two critical sites today: My old g-mail and a Flickr account. When I switched Internet providers, upon moving to Texas in January, losing track of my g-mail password locked me out of that account and by extension, the e-mail-dependent Flickr. The photographic storage site’s customer support helped me get back in, and a short time later, I contacted by g-mail, offering a more secure means of accessing the old account. This means I have two g-mail accounts, and a Yahoo! address, so I won’t be out of anyone’s loop.

Many times in life, I have either lost contact with people and things that have meant a great deal to me. Some have resurfaced, a few years later; others, have returned to my circle after a few decades and some are still out there somewhere. In every case, those losses have been because I have been needed by those closest to me. The old adage, “If you love something, let it go……”, keeps coming back on replay; and that’s okay. My life of travel and community service has been set aside for the benefit of a very bright, rambunctious and captivating little girl-and I would do this a thousand times over. There is no telling how much she is going to mean to the world, but I sense it will be a great deal.

Some of what I have given up will be brought back into my life, especially if it will benefit Hana. I look forward to all of that, and to much else that I can only imagine at this point. My sense of worth and of accomplishment are what have most strongly been recaptured.

Rounding the Corners

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Education, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 20,2026– Hana has taught herself to turn, when she gets to a corner on the crawling mat. She had been getting frustrated at the presence of a baseboard and wall, but understood, when I lightly knocked on them, that the choice was to either move left, onto the carpet or right along the north edge of the mat. She chose to turn right. She later had a very satisfying army crawl session, and went completely around the mat, turning at all four corners.

My granddaughter’s early demonstration of common sense shows that it doesn’t necessarily take a command of language, in order for the thought process to engage. Perhaps there is a lesson here for some who either overthink things or whose minds are so bollixed up that common sense appears to have gone on permanent vacation.

I am hardly proposing “Are You Smarter Than A Four-Month Old?”, yet we could do without some of the word salads that are coming out of the mouths of some prominent people, including a few who are in leadership positions. We could do even more without the defense of inanity that follows such diatribes, in certain elements of the media.

Life is a series of rounding corners, and in many cases, of following a path out of the square or triangle into which one has been wearing a path. Hana has already figured that out, also, and has communicated to me that she wants to be able to crawl outside the mat. Once her parents and I set up a safe, clean route for that, it’ll happen.

No matter what age one is, there is no need to turn a path into a rut.

Snapped

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 19, 2026- The news about a man killing seven of his children, and one of their friends, hit hard. It happened in Shreveport, 2 hours and 49 minutes from here. There are a thousand reasons why anyone would be prompted to kill his/her own offspring-and none of those reasons are good. There is speculation that the suspect, himself now dead, just snapped. There are survivors of the day’s events, and maybe they will shed some light on what led to the slaughter. It will pulsate for a long time.

Life, especially when stress levels are not addressed, preferably by family members who have cache with the suffering one, can be overwhelming. In my extended family, interventions have been timely and effective-in saving marriages, mentoring wayward teens and young adults and, in one case, saving a life. My parents had cache on both sides of the family, and were not shy about stepping up to help, when they saw a problem.

I had a dream last night, that Hana had been spanked for crying-not by her parents, and certainly not by me, but by another family member, indeterminate. In the dream, I was yelling at the punisher, who just shrugged their shoulders and said that’s how it is here. To be sure, in real life, none of the three of us are inclined to use corporal punishment, for any reason. Certainly, an infant would be kept safe from such a thing, especially for self-expression. Once she reaches toddler stage, her parents vow to be firm, saying and meaning “No”, when necessary, while still acknowledging her feelings and offering some limited, acceptable alternatives. The same will continue throughout her childhood and adolescence. I will support them in their efforts.

Eight tender souls, their lives snuffed out, as someone on whom they should have relied turned on them and became their executioner. It could be laid at the feet of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, on our culture of anonymity, on the shifting sands of spiritual connection, or lack thereof. It is always a wake-up call-and how many of these will be needed, before each community takes stock of its members?

What I’ve Done Lately

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 18, 2026- The out-of-the-blue critic questioned whether I have done anything “today” for women and girls. I answered. matter-of-factly, because when someone addresses me by name, my idea of courtesy is to acknowledge what seems to be their concern. My career, protecting and educating children and teenagers aside, what I am doing NOW is to help raise a little girl to be forthright, to articulate and follow her dreams and to grow into a woman of character and strength-like her mother and maternal grandmother, like her paternal grandmother, like her great grandmothers,

That will likely mean little to the ideologue who spent too much time worrying about what a man she’s never met-and is unlikely to ever encounter-does to help womankind. Actions are never enough for someone whose anger, mindset, life experiences create a blindness that would take years of counterbalancing to relieve.

So, I consider the comment that I made, on a longtime friend’s site, about narcissists not having anyone to blame but themselves, for whatever lack of success they may have in finding a mate. Even after pondering the critic’s remarks, I hold fast to that conviction-and do not regard it as making excuses for anyone’s bad behaviour. Narcissism is a condition, not a dodge; just as, for me, autism is a condition, but does not give me a free pass to conduct myself in an untoward manner.

I will carry on, tomorrow, and for years to come, helping my granddaughter embrace life to the fullest. I will stand beside, and help, other women and girls, whenever time allows and in the manner that they request. I will address statements and actions stemming from misogyny, to the best of my ability. I will not, however, be a slave to the loudest voices in the room. One size does not fit all, and mere ideology fits few, if any.

Progress

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 17,2026- My chiropractor saw a fair amount of progress, in the loosening up of vertebrae that had been tight after my slipping on ice, in late January. It’s nice to be on track to be where I was, spine-wise, in December of last year. My overall medical state is excellent and a dental check-up will happen soon, under new auspices.

Hana is making progress of her own, building on her mobility skills. She is also very good at making her needs known-and this afternoon, while I was “burping” her, after a feeding, she spat up some and it got on my shoulder. She immediately pulled her head off my shoulder and fussed at me until I actually noticed the spots, a few seconds later. She notices changes in furniture and in what one of us is wearing. Not having much language yet, her visual focus tells the story.

Aram and Yunhee are each solving problems, in their respective job sites. The cybersecurity and logistics industries are lucky to have such proactive and dedicated workers. That’s not just me being prejudiced; each of them is working past hours, putting the actual task in front of them as the criterion for when to stop. on a given day.

On a wider level, humanity is making more progress towards solving various environmental problems. It may not be universal, by a long shot, but National Geographic has identified 33 people who are actively making inroads into specific problems, from ocean health to climate-friendly housing. Some of these folks are famous: Harrison Ford, Russell Westbrook, Stella McCartney and Shailene Woodley. Others, like Francis Kere and Lauren Eatwell, are bound to become well-known, for their efforts.

May your own efforts at improving your family’s and community’s well-being likewise make a difference, as the days roll by!

Her Rules

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Education, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 15, 2026= Hana is able to complete three “laps” two forward and one back, army crawling on a ten foot long mat. She will not give up until the third lap is finished, most times. A week shy of four months, my granddaughter is showing very definite drive, getting annoyed with herself if she doesn’t complete a lap. She will, however, stop and listen to me telling her it’s okay to rest. The last thing I want is to foster a hyper-anxiety over developmental tasks. This is where self-concept and work ethic begin, on a very rudimentary level.

She has a definite preference for sleeping on her belly, or at least laying on her right side. If I return her to lying on her back, she huffs and goes right back on her side. She definitely has the mindset, “my body, my rules”, when it comes to sleeping position. So, we monitor to make sure she is able to breathe, then turn her on her back, when she is in deep sleep.

She likes being near the table, when one or more of us is eating, and will babble a comment or make a sharp sound, to draw attention. I think most of this is due to sitting in a bouncy chair, so far below table level. There is also her being quite sociable, enjoying being around people. I know that she will not be ignored, as she takes her place in the world.

I will encourage my granddaughter to be assertive, while also respecting the rights of others, as she formulates her rules of engagement.

Comfort

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 14, 2026- Both my son and daughter-in-law work from home, most days. Hana knows when her mother is in the office, which is across the hall from the living room, where her play mat is located. For several days now, she has been getting frustrated at reaching the end of the play mat and having to turn around and army crawl back the other way. I finally figured it out, this afternoon. She wanted to try and crawl to her mother’s office. It would involve going on a section of carpet, then up onto the wooden foyer and over to the office. I deflected her. Instead, she got to sit in the office for about ten minutes, until she was getting too chatty while her mother was on a conference call. It was okay that I took her back out. She had been able to have a little time, realized her goal, and felt comfort.

A little bit later, some heating/cooling technicians came by, and fixed some duct work issues that had left us feeling like we were living in a sweat lodge. It hasn’t been too hot outside, so the fix is a proactive one-given that we can expect several days of 100 + F temperatures, between late May and September. The four of us will now have comfort. We will also save on energy costs.

The second most important thing I can do for my family, right now, is to provide some relief for Aram and Yunhee, in household maintenance, as much as possible- especially in keeping the kitchen and bathrooms clean and the yard in order. It is in the interests of all four of us, that they not feel overwhelmed by the trifecta of job, parenting and home. I remember all too well how that felt. There is no shame in providing a fair amount of comfort.

Meticulous

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 13, 2026- The semiannual check-up began an hour late, and lasted two hours. The late start was due to the doctor spending an extra hour with the patient before me. When I came in, he spent the first hour going over my experience with Prescott VA, then spent an hour going over my recent lab results, and explaining his position on a certain medication. During that time, we each ate our lunch items, while he meticulously went over my vitals, which he found quite good. The one area that he found could improve, is the focus of the medication he is prescribing. Otherwise, he feels I am on track for a reasonable longevity. Suffice it to say, this physician is easily the most thorough and knowledgeable medical professional I have consulted since I left Phoenix.

Hana had a surprise of her own, this morning. I had to answer Nature’s call, while I was working with her on her army crawling, so I put her on her back, on the mat, did my business and came back a minute later. She had turned over and was back to army crawling, on her own. She repeated this same action, this evening, when her mother set her down and put something in the next room. The little girl has a very strong drive to build her developmental skills. She is also quite systematic, already, in how she goes about her activity.

Aram went around the house, this evening, and catalogued all the points that I will need to go over, with some workmen who will be here tomorrow, regarding the heating and cooling system, and a few peripheral issues. He is getting out in front of the potential heat waves that are bound to come in a month or two. My son has grown into a meticulous man, though I saw the seeds of that early on, even when he was a middle school student. He would want to go back over certain material, two or three times.

I am getting the sense that now the key to good health and well-being lies in careful attention to detail. I find that most gratifying.