Category Archives: Education

The Totoro Wallpaper

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Education, Entertainment, Family, Fiction, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social

May 12, 2026- Hana’s mother has been very busy, these past two days, receiving and arranging two boxes of books, and carefully putting a mural of the Japanese character Totoro and his friends on the wall of Hana’s play area. My curious granddaughter now has friendly faces upon which to gaze, when she looks upon the wall, while resting from all the crawling she’s been doing.

Above, are Totoro (bottom) and his two rabbit friends, who are called “Smaller Totoros”.

I am getting a quick education on popular Japanese cartoon characters. Others, who have their own plush toys, include Pompomporin, a dog who likes caramel pudding; Hello Kitty; My Melody ( a rabbit); Kerokerokeroppi ( a frog) and My Sweet Piano (a sheep), These are Sanrio characters. There are also many Pokemon plush toys, including the ubiquitous Pikachu, who is, of course, a pika. With these characters, and more, Hana will be able to let her imagination run wild. I look forward to her weaving stories, in her toddler and middle childhood years.

All this is actually a balm for me as well. Paying attention to the goings on outside these four walls, I almost think the anime world is saner. I know that all that is going wrong will fall away, in time, yet I want to keep my granddaughter’s world as innocent as possible, while her character forms.

By Example

2
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Family, Inner Struggles, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

May 11, 2026- Some of what I have modeled for Hana has been physical-even crawling on my hands and knees, a little, so she can see what is involved, and reading words from left to right, pointing,as she follows each word, I also explain what I;m doing, step by step, no matter how simple the task.

She maintains focus, quite a bit more than one might expect a 4.5-month-old infant to keep attention. It seems to be a matter of storing information, either for use in a week or two, as with crawling or the sequence of letters, to recall and use as a toddler.

Funny thing about example: One never knows when little eyes and ears are picking up on what is being said or done. I had given up cursing long before Aram was born, as I just didn’t see any use for such talk, when other words met my needs just as well. He was quite assertive, in calling out what he thought was behaviour that was not in sync with words, especially in middle childhood.

I have a feeling that Hana will do the same. She already communicates quite well, with body language, eye contact and babbles that are fairly comprehensible as words. There is even a fair amount of intonation that give a sense of what she wants to convey.

Example is just the least one can do, to build character in those for whom one is responsible. It is crucial in child rearing-and just as much so, in positions of public responsibility. I had a high bar to maintain, and did, as a teacher, counselor and building principal-and even as a substitute teacher, in my last years of work. I didn’t always meet the expectations of the higher echelon or of the governing boards, but my standing with all but a few students, co-workers and parents was constantly stable.

Elected officials, likewise, would do a whole lot better to adhere to the highest standard of conduct. It’s been a while since that bar has been met, by all too many in public office. This has nothing to do with ideology. As we have seen, there are honest, trustworthy conservatives and progressives alike and there are the opposite, among both camps.

Bringing oneself to account each day seems to be the most effective counter to backsliding and it pays dividends, in terms of how one’s example is followed.

False Equivalence

2
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Community, Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Striving

May 8, 2026- I read a post, this evening, in which a grown woman complains that a 6-year-old, who has been diagnosed with autism, “conveniently” reins in her tantrums-when there are no flashing lights and sudden noises. My, my!

I am mildly autistic. Much of my more “inconvenient” behaviour has fallen away, over the past few decades. It’s been a while, since I was six year old -or thirteen-or twenty-five. Learning which foods aggravate my neural functioning, and avoiding them, has helped. Meditation and daily prayer also help focus my energies. Maturation, though, has been largely responsible, for changes in my behaviour.

I will say, though, that we still have a society which is poor at recognizing developmental differences between young children, adolescents, young adults and people of “middle age”. I spoke yesterday about magical thinking. People like the complainer in the above-mentioned post tend to indulge in wishful thinking. Too lazy, rigid or ignorant to recognize and accept differences in people, they stage public shaming rituals and look under rocks for reasons to excoriate those with disabilities.

While I, out of common courtesy, have made a concerted effort to evolve my own behaviours in a positive direction, If I encounter a confrontation between a neurodivergent child and an adult, other than a parent*, who is passing judgement, I will stand up for the child. There are ways to calm and refocus an autistic or other neurodivergent person. Confrontation and “tough love” are certainly not among them.

Beside, saying that a 6-year-old should be held to the same standard as an adult is false equivalence and says more about the unmet needs of the complainer than it does about the child.

  • Parents of neurodivergent children are most often supportive of their child and seek non-escaltatory solutions to situations that arise, involving their child.

Magical Thinking

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Fiction, Historical, impediments, Inner Struggles, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

May 7, 2026- Hana pushes herself to reach certain places on her crawling mat, but was showing a bit of frustration at being limited to the same route, day after day. It was time for another segment, so down went the multi-modal quilt, with its alphabet, colour bar, shapes and illustrations of animals and objects. This doubled the area that she has to navigate, and she took to it right away.

My granddaughter had been acting as if she should be able to go through walls or pieces of furniture, getting frustrated at this also, so Papa has the task of gently encouraging her to turn, when confronted with a barrier. I even showed her that my almighty self can’t go through a wall, which she found amusing, while getting the point.

Many of the old stories I am reading her now, European fairy tales, present magical solutions to harrowing scenes. I choose to focus more on the character-building elements that are embedded in the tales, rather than the amazing feats of derring do. It only touches a slight level of her consciousness, of course, but I can recall, from my own toddlerhood, having a sense that I had heard stories that pointed the way to correctness, even earlier in my life. So, we go down this path together, She will retain what sticks in her mind and re-learn the rest later.

Much magical thinking comes from being used to having certain things happen almost instantaneously- like fast food being prepared and served in minutes, or AI popping up with answers to questions, in mere seconds. Another friend, examining the matter, points out that experiencing something, even several times, does not mean that it will be integrated with one’s psyche or behavioural repertoire. “I spent a week in Sweden” hardly qualifies me to claim any more than cursory knowledge of the country and its people. “I changed the spark plugs in my Ford LTD, back in 1975”, does not make me anywhere near a skilled auto mechanic. It is integration, not encountering, that determines the level of any change one wishes to see in life.

There is also a larger process at work, sometimes called “the arc of history” and in other forums, “the Major Plan of God”. We on the ground can only understand a smidgen of it, but here’s the thing: Just as a motor vehicle can go either forward or in reverse, it moves most efficiently forward. Reverse is meant only for short distances, like backing out of a parking space, or going a few yards back to where a loved one is waiting to communicate a last-minute thought. Going backwards in society can only be temporary, mostly to correct errors made in moving ahead too quickly. It cannot be done with a view towards reinstating the “Golden Days of Yesteryear”.

I will have more to say about this in an upcoming post.

Brevity and Longevity

0
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Education, Entertainment, Family, Fiction, Historical, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

May 2, 2026- If I live to be 100, or longer, it may well be partly due to the things in which I invest time and energy. Certainly, being fully involved in the life of my grandchild has a part to play. So does any exercise or even resuming travel again, once Hana is of school age and her parents have earned vacation time. Diet also comes into play.

Then, there is the reading material in which I invest time. I am rediscovering classics, in my choice of what to read to Hana. I have read her “Heidi” and am currently reading her “The Red Pony”, by John Steinbeck. It’s a bit tougher than Johanna Spyri’s classic,and shows a different way of looking at life’s challenges. She will only have a slight sense of the mood of the story, so I am not concerned with its effects. I will revert more to more conventional children’s works, going forward, as her awareness grows and she actually starts asking questions. That day is coming faster than some of you may think.

My personal reading, both print books and long form Substack pieces, is also going to keep the gray matter oiled and lubed. Both media are comprised of thought=provoking pieces. I am presently reading “The Beginning Comes After The End”, by Rebecca Solnit and “The God of the Woods”, by Liz Moore. Substack sites range from “The Hungary Report” and “Life Intelligence” to “The Gut Check Guy” and “The Good Men Project”. There are a total of ten sites, not all of which show in my feed every day.

Many people opt for the fast food of journalism: Reels and clips. The problem I have with high brevity is that only part of any given story is presented. Then there is a hint, “Click to continue”, which the one time I fell for it, I was asked to subscribe to the reel’s host site-big bucks for the equivalent of a Big Mac.

Brevity has its place, but the maintenance of a well-oiled thinking machine needs a considerably higher-level investment. I may not be digging into “War and Peace” anytime soon, but long-form is a better investment of time and energy.

Rounding the Corners

0
Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Education, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 20,2026– Hana has taught herself to turn, when she gets to a corner on the crawling mat. She had been getting frustrated at the presence of a baseboard and wall, but understood, when I lightly knocked on them, that the choice was to either move left, onto the carpet or right along the north edge of the mat. She chose to turn right. She later had a very satisfying army crawl session, and went completely around the mat, turning at all four corners.

My granddaughter’s early demonstration of common sense shows that it doesn’t necessarily take a command of language, in order for the thought process to engage. Perhaps there is a lesson here for some who either overthink things or whose minds are so bollixed up that common sense appears to have gone on permanent vacation.

I am hardly proposing “Are You Smarter Than A Four-Month Old?”, yet we could do without some of the word salads that are coming out of the mouths of some prominent people, including a few who are in leadership positions. We could do even more without the defense of inanity that follows such diatribes, in certain elements of the media.

Life is a series of rounding corners, and in many cases, of following a path out of the square or triangle into which one has been wearing a path. Hana has already figured that out, also, and has communicated to me that she wants to be able to crawl outside the mat. Once her parents and I set up a safe, clean route for that, it’ll happen.

No matter what age one is, there is no need to turn a path into a rut.

Reading

2
Posted by on in Assistance, children, Education, Family, Literary criticism, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 16,2026– As part of my activities with Hana, I read to her for 15-20 minutes, each post-feeding session, before I put her on the mat for her stretching and crawling practice. I have read her a few small cloth books and several small picture books. Around the time she reached three months, I started reading “Heidi”, by Johanna Spyri. It was one of the books that Penny had as a child. Hana pays attention quite well, especially when I change my voice for different characters, like the mercurial but loving Grandfather or the sullen but efficient Fraulein Rottenmeier.

I hope to impart to her a love of the printed word, both as a listener and as a reader. I learned to read basic words around age four, and mastered phonetics by the age of six. Aram was able to read by the age of five. Hana focuses on the words that are on some of the t-shirts I wear around the house, and I tell her what they say, several times a day, when we are together. When she is able to sit without assistance, I will start introducing letter cards and familiarizing her with the sounds associated with each letter.

Around age two, I hope to start introducing short words on cards, and have her repeat the sounds. Of course the read aloud activities will continue, even after she starts pre-school. I look forward to talking with her about the books we read-what she likes and dislikes about the book; who her favourite and not favourite characters are and why. Most importantly, I want to encourage her to think about what is read.

The printed word has been, in many ways, a medium that kept me grounded, while at the same time expanding my horizons. I wish the same for my grandchild.

Her Rules

0
Posted by on in children, collaborating, Education, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 15, 2026= Hana is able to complete three “laps” two forward and one back, army crawling on a ten foot long mat. She will not give up until the third lap is finished, most times. A week shy of four months, my granddaughter is showing very definite drive, getting annoyed with herself if she doesn’t complete a lap. She will, however, stop and listen to me telling her it’s okay to rest. The last thing I want is to foster a hyper-anxiety over developmental tasks. This is where self-concept and work ethic begin, on a very rudimentary level.

She has a definite preference for sleeping on her belly, or at least laying on her right side. If I return her to lying on her back, she huffs and goes right back on her side. She definitely has the mindset, “my body, my rules”, when it comes to sleeping position. So, we monitor to make sure she is able to breathe, then turn her on her back, when she is in deep sleep.

She likes being near the table, when one or more of us is eating, and will babble a comment or make a sharp sound, to draw attention. I think most of this is due to sitting in a bouncy chair, so far below table level. There is also her being quite sociable, enjoying being around people. I know that she will not be ignored, as she takes her place in the world.

I will encourage my granddaughter to be assertive, while also respecting the rights of others, as she formulates her rules of engagement.

Messy

2
Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 6, 2026- Babies can be messy. They need to be bathed, have their diapers changed, undersides cleaned, faces washed and mouths rinsed with pre-dental solution.

Children can be messy. They need to be taught to take their shoes or boots off, when entering a house, or wipe their feet, when entering a public place. They need to be trained to wipe themselves after using a toilet, and wash their hands afterward, then dry them with a cloth or paper towel. They need to be shown how to make their beds and clean their rooms, putting things back where they found them.

Teenagers can be messy. They need to be held to account and actively encouraged to slow down and be present in a situation. They know how to focus on others; they do so with their friends, all the time. Extend that focus to people older and younger than themselves.

Families can be messy. Patience and communication are the cleaning agents. So is reflection-remembering when one was in the same position as the one who made the mess, or looking ahead to when one will be in the same position. The child will become an adult, and very well may be a parent. The parent may very well become a grandparent. The grandparent must never forget what it was like to be a baby, a child, a teenager, a parent.

Communities, and organizations, can be messy. Patience, and communication, are even more essential here, even as they become more complex. Technology can help, and it can also hinder; the way in which it is used determines which will be the case. The viewpoints of leaders, and members, will decide how tools, including technology, are used.

Life is messy; it can only be cleaned by those living it.

Atonement

0
Posted by on in Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social

April 5, 2026- It was a blustery, snowy night, in February, 1978. Out of money, out of gas for my Ford LTD, I walked into the Sheriff’s Office, in Skowhegan, and asked the deputy to lock me in a cell for the night. I had broken no human laws, but still felt that a night in jail was what I deserved. He obliged-no charges, no fines, just a hard bunk, an old pillow and a blanket.

I had gone up to the Winter Carnival, in Quebec, with three young ladies along. They found their own accommodations, and I, my own. We met up on Sunday morning, after what had been a fairly pleasant 1 1/2 days. The ride back, through an increasingly heavy snow, was sent from Down Below. By the time we got to Skowhegan, in western Maine, the car was nearly out of gas, we were all just about out of money and the women were out of patience with me. They left, and were able to hitch a ride, or two, back to Orono, and their university dorms.

I chose to wait until morning, thus the jail cell. It’s the only time I have ever been the guest of a county sheriff, or of any law enforcement authority. At 7 a.m., the sheriff himself unlocked the cell and wished me well. I got the remaining food out of the cooler in the car, locked it again and hitched my own ride back to Bangor. I called my cousin in Orono and got him to take me tot he bank, then to Skowhegan, where I then gassed up the car and caravaned with him back to Bangor. (As it happened, Monday was bright and sunny, and I had been expected at work. A call from the pay phone outside the sheriff’s office cleared that up.)

I thought, long and hard, that night, about the man I’d become: Unmoored, in a no-win job situation, and with little to show for my twenty-seven years. I shortly afterward entered a Master’s program, at the University of Maine. I would not take more than three courses, in the time I had left, but it was a jump forward and I showed myself that there was hope for the future. In June, 1980, my Master’s program re-started, at Northern Arizona University, and I made good.

A footnote: Cleaning out my LTD, on Monday afternoon after the debacle, I found the wallet of one of the ladies, and drove it up to her dorm in Orono. She wasn’t in, which was just as well, so I left it with her roommate, who had heard all the grisly details and was understandably frosty. I only hope the lives of those three women have gone much better, since that night.