Category Archives: Family

The Road to Diamond, Day 142: The Long of It

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 19, 2025- Today was the 250th anniversary of the beginning of the Battles of Lexington and Concord, which are seen by many as the beginning of the American War for Independence from Great Britain. It is also the twelfth anniversary of the Boston Marathon bombing, by which two men and a woman tried to make the claim that the American Experience was ignoring the plight of Muslims in Western and Central Asia, and thus Americans deserved to suffer.

A conservative friend recently pointed out that the basic conflict in our society is between those who believe good actions should be the result of free choice and those who believe that good actions often have to be coerced. I believe that most people start out the socializing portion of their lives (around age 4) wanting to please the people who are most closely in their view (parents, siblings, grandparents and, if they are lucky, extended family like aunts, uncles and cousins). Friends begin to be made around that time, as well. If that love is not reciprocated, for whatever reason, the person will devise other means of obtaining goals. Thus, greed, aggression and devious behaviour (such as lying or fantasizing) take root.

So, until such time as the spiritualization of the entirety of the human race is realized, we need some governmental safeguards, to serve as prompts, in moments of feckless, antisocial or exclusionary activity. We needed government to put a stop to slavery, then to two-tiered education systems and institutionalized racism, then to the same discriminatory practices regarding the treatment of women-and by extension, homosexuals. We needed government to protect workers from the excessive greed of employers. To some extent, we still need these laws, to guard against backsliding.

Freedom is never going to be free, so if we as a species want to be able to function without coercion, there is only one long term answer, the development and maintenance of self-discipline. My life has only become freer since I made a disciplined lifestyle my reality. I am quite certain that the same is true of anyone else who truly feels personal freedom.

The Road to Diamond, Day 140: First Dibs

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, impediments, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 17, 2025- I checked online, about a request that I made to be relieved of a volunteer slot at an upcoming charity event. The request was denied, due to a shortage of other interested volunteers. I could very well take the stance that it’s my time, something more important, further afield, has come up and life is just too bad sometimes.

I will do nothing of the sort. My word is good for a lot more than convenience. The event in this community will benefit a lot of children and teens. The event for which I might have traded my time would primarily benefit only me, with Kathy getting a video of a place which I have already taken several photographs. So, the edge goes to Home Base I.

There are several choices that will need to be made, both on an individual and on a collective basis, over the next several months, and likely well into next year. I can only control what choices I make, so here it is: With Baha’i Teachings as my road map, my little family and Kathy come first, followed by extended family, then this community-including Baha’i friends and finally, all those across the continent and the world. I guess I put myself somewhere in the middle of it all, yet I will survive just fine.

I know, in each situation, who gets first dibs.

The Road to Diamond, Day 135: An Overdue Reunion

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

April 12, 2025- The cousins had not seen one another for forty years, though they have spoken by phone on several occasions. Their embrace was timeless and classical, reflecting the universality of family and of the human need for continuity.

Reunited
Bobot, Thelma and Celeste after dinner, with a “stealth selfie” of yours truly.

Coming from large families, on both sides, I thoroughly appreciated what was transpiring, in this well-appointed home, on Phoenix’s far south side. The Filipina cousins re-cemented routes that had never really been severed, over a delectable meal of chicken adobo and steamed kalabasa(squash). I will hopefully meet with some of my own cousins next month, though our parting has not been anywhere near as long.

The day began well, with visits to Prescott Farmers’ Market and Zeke’s Eatin’ Place. Each of my local friends were gracious and welcoming to Babot and Thelma. The visits afforded them free samosas and enough food from Zeke’s to keep them for another day or so.

We next drove down to Desert Rose Baha’i Institute, in Eloy. There was a great temperature difference between there and Prescott, so we kept our outdoor time to a minimum. The caretakers were busy with another matter, so after brief conversations with them,we conducted our own tour. I made what I thought was a comprehensive video, using my i-Phone, only to later find that it had somehow jammed and ended up recording nothing. (Note to self, next time use the camera. It doesn’t depend on cell towers.) I have photos from a January visit here, and Bobot took his own video, which I hope turned out better. In any case, my friends enjoyed this little bit of Baha’i property.

The last journey on my watch, from Eloy to Phoenix, was marred by neither dust storms nor heavy traffic. We found the house easily, and after showing my friends that the best way to get someone to let them in to a house was by pressing the doorbell, rather than relying solely on the phone, the joyful reunion was complete.

I drove back to Home Base I, a bit tired, but happy that the week has been a fair success.

The Road to Diamond, Day 122: The Value of Love

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

March 30, 2025- In reflecting further on King Lear, which I experienced last night, for the first time since studying the tragedy, as a high school senior (57 years ago), it was showcased as another example of the primacy of love, and the ultimate futility of scheming and power-seeking, through external means.

This morning, a fellow diner at breakfast spoke of a young relative, who had been disaffected from her own mother and siblings. The young woman is welcomed by this person and spouse, and not subjected to judgment, but rather a loving home-which has its rules of order, but not strictures of stifling.

I have made a lot of progress in that regard, with any difficulties for which I was responsible in the past having largely come from my own self-loathing. The result is that, within my own space, life has taken on a new energy, a stronger hope that, even in the autumn of my life, and into its winter in the decades to come, I will continue to radiate what is deepest in my heart. I have recently had dreams of children who resemble both my son and my daughter-in-law. The children have each stood at the side of my bed and told me they loved me. This may be foreshadowing, or just a reflection of how I would feel towards any grandchild(ren) who enter our lives.

The most important thing, though, is that self-love radiates outward, and touches everyone who comes along. That is something that had to survive a few hard relationships, in the latter part of the 2010s and would have to transcend any setbacks in the years to come, as well. Love, as I’ve said before, is the basis for all else that is.

The Road to Diamond, Day 111: Yin/Yang

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

March 19,2025- The little girl holding an arm load of red and green tennis balls looked plaintively at me, through the chain-link fence of the tennis court, as I was walking back from downtown. There, near my feet, was a stray ball, with the same yin/yang design as the ones she was holding. I picked up the ball and tossed it, underhand, over the fence to her waiting, appreciative father.

Earlier, while I was on the way downtown, a man and his three sons were riding their bicycles, with a good heady speed, up the slight hill. This sort of exercise is vital to people, especially children, so I gladly stepped aside. Kids on bicycles or on skateboards, deserve all the support they can get, from adults. It was a joy to see the father engaged with his children.

These families are not uncommon in Prescott. People are always gathered outdoors, in this manner. It made the message I read when I got home, from the Baha’i Faith’s Supreme Body, all the more cogent. The Universal House of Justice wrote us on the subject of the importance of family, as the basic unit of society. ‘Abdu’l-Baha said, in the early 20th Century, that the family was the miniature of a nation. In today’s letter, the Institution noted that there is a struggle between forces, which are pulling society in opposite directions. The family, in its functioning, needs to steer a middle path between the two extremes, and focus on building character in its children-a character which will serve the person well, throughout life.

Towards evening, I learned that someone in our neighbourhood, an obviously troubled individual, had to be jailed for lewd and lascivious behaviour. There are small children next door to Home Base I and two teenage girls live in houses across the street. I look out for these kids, while knowing they have loving and dedicated parents. The miscreant will not harm any of them, even if released for some reason.

There is always a yin and yang.

The Road to Diamond, Day 110: Clarity

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal goals, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 18, 2025- My time with the AARP accounting team brought the news that this is the Year of the Pittance. At least I owe nothing and am not depending on a hefty refund. The year really takes flight, once the tax returns are filed. There is a clarity, as to one’s financial situation, which in turn helps define the path ahead-in tandem with family milestones, friends’ plans to visit and the overall prognosis for community needs.

I met with our local Red Cross Director, yesterday, and agreed to hold down the fort during the next six months, at least, in terms of arranging coverage for any shelters we may need,during Spring and Summer. Even when I am on the road, in the first three weeks of May, I can monitor and contact our team members, who are exceptional in times of crisis.

A call came from Filipino friends, who will visit Arizona, from April 7-14. I will meet them in Las Vegas on the 7th, and will gladly show them our state’s highlights, visit other friends, and just be a good host. Anything that can cement a bridge across the Pacific is worth whatever is needed.

Meanwhile, here at Home Base, the rest of March is a quieter time, though Naw-Ruz, the Persian and Baha’i New Year, is two days away-and will be celebrated with feasting, music and dancing. Spring will arrive, the next day, and somewhere in the area there is a trail that will feel my footsteps in honour of Vernal Equinox.

So much is clear tonight, and despite the horrors that unfolded in the nation’s midsection, over the past few days, I sense a sowing of seeds is coming, in more ways than one. We the People will get past all the nonsense and obfuscation, because we can.

The Road to Diamond, Day 101: A Book In The Rocks

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Posted by on in Community, Family, Historical, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 9, 2025, Yuma- Many years ago, one of my students told me that it would be very worthwhile to visit Picture Rocks Petroglyph Site, on her father’s reservation: The Tohono O’odham Gila Bend Band, about 20 miles west of the transportation hub known as Gila Bend.

I spent an hour or so with my overnight hosts, talking of a variety of topics, then went to Penny’s grave site. There, I found that the water for flower vases has been turned off and the restrooms at the National Cemetery have been closed. Whether this is part of the DOGE downsizing, or merely a water conservation measure, is uncertain. I just used some water I had in the Sportage, and left the flowers in vase at my angel’s site.

I found that my excess energy needed to be brought under control-with several little hiccups occurring, while I was fueling the SUV. So, a few deep breaths later, I was good to go. Traveling along some back roads towards I-10, and over to Buckeye, then down AZ 85, I had ample opportunity to get a grip on any impatience that may have been under the surface, and managed quite well. I’m sure that those on the receiving end of my patience were quite grateful.

I stopped at Picture Rocks, some 33 years after my student told me about them. It is a hidden gem, and then some. The petroglyphs are of two styles: Archaic, meaning they are primitive and were done by people who lived there before the Huhugam (ancestors of the Tohono and Akimel O’odham) and Gila, the work of the Huhugam. I walked around in amazement at the wealth of drawings on the south side of the rock mound, from its base to its summit. For whatever reason, there are no inscriptions on the west or north sides of the mound. It is fortunate that the mound is cordoned off, and visitors look at the petroglyphs from a short distance. Thus, there are no “Becca loves Jamison, 2022” and such.

Here are six of the scenes that I found at Picture Rocks.

Man vs. Bighorn sheep, Picture Rocks, AZ

A hunting expedition, Picture Rocks, AZ
View of the summit, Picture Rocks, AZ
Busy day in the village, Picture Rocks, AZ
More busy times, Picture Rocks, AZ
News from bottom to top, Picture Rocks, AZ

The scene is best viewed in person, but you get the “Picture”. (couldn’t resist).

The Road to Diamond, Day 100: Compassion in Action

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 8, 2025, Phoenix- The tall, silver-haired man stepped forward, as the wiry younger man with intense eyes walked up to a pair of young women who were working the management table at Farmers’ Market were doing their wrap-up work for the day. The ladies had noticed the bronzed military veteran walking about and talking to others, in a manner that seemed to make people uncomfortable. They were quite perturbed that he was still there, when there were only a few of us workers left.

The older man calmly helped one of the women, his daughter, in folding tablecloths, and when the ex-Marine asked if he might have one of the cloths to use as a blanket, replied that it was already needed for the table and, in any case, would not be very warm. For my part, I engaged the fellow veteran in conversation for a few minutes, letting him know where he could get a meal during the week, while I folded up a few tables. It was the father, keeping a careful, but calm eye out for his child’s safety, who showed the most compassion, getting the younger man a bag for the groceries he’d purchased or been comped and fetching a loaf of bread for him to take along. It was this which finally prompted the ex-Marine to leave.

We have many among us who are mentally ill, to some degree or another. I have had my own challenges, in that respect, and though I have come to function at a high level, cannot cast aspersions on those who are worse off. Of course, we need to hold other people to a modicum of civility, and not allow for abusive or overly intrusive behaviour. Women and children need to feel, and be, secure. Especially after the wanton murder of a young woman outside Mesa, a few weeks ago, my mind is all over keeping a safe environment. The man in question seemed to merely want company and to engage in conversation, even if it were in a looping manner. It was just not the right time and place for him to engage the women.

After he left, a group of us helped one of the vendors who was agitated for an entirely different reason, and took down his tents, while he tended to the matter at hand. It is always a matter of regarding people as family.

Once this was all in the rear view mirror, I got things together and hopped in the Sportage, heading down to a gathering at the home of an old friend. About thirty people gathered for dinner and a wide range of conversations about everything from spirituality to the modern circus. The ambiance, as always at this house, was one of universal compassion and love for mankind. After seeing people I had not seen for several years and meeting many new friends, I have retired to my room for the night, satisfied that it will remain compassion, rather than self-interest, that will carry the day.

The Road to Diamond, Day 94: Close Calls

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Family, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

March 2, 2025- Myrtle Beach was an unexpected surprise, when I was near the end of my Army Basic Training, in mid-August, 1969. I earned a three-day pass, and got to spend 1 1/2 days just enjoying a cabana to myself and the long strand of sand, with plenty of the scenery that appealed to an 18-year-old man-child. I haven’t been back there since, though I’ve been close-having visited Florence and Hemingway, as well as the Louis Gregory Baha’i Institute, in 2016 and 2018.

Myrtle Beach has grown immensely, in the past 56 years. Its popularity as a resort has kept pace with that of several other towns, up and down the Atlantic Coast. So, it was a major national concern when the city was threatened by wildfire, over the past two days. Resources have been rushed to the area, and containment of the fire stands at 30 %, as I write this.

Tryon, NC is a town I visited in 2019. I briefly considered moving there, from Phoenix, in 2011, before deciding on Prescott. Tryon and nearby Saluda are also dealing with a wildfire. It, too, is 30% contained, as of now. Tryon is prime horse country, southeast of Asheville and high upon the South Carolina state line.

I pray for both areas, knowing that there, but for the grace of God, goes our area. We expect rain or snow on Tuesday, and again towards the end of this week. It won’t do much to stave off fire, and given the current status of wildland firefighting teams, it likely falls to us volunteers to check on campsites, to make sure no embers are left to wait for a sudden gust of wind. This is exactly what brought me back from the Philippines and is keeping me close by, over most of the next six months. In a couple of weeks, our Red Cross team will be holding a dry run of a shelter set-up. A while back, I was asked to direct this exercise, and will see whether that still holds, at our meeting on Thursday.

This will be a year for many close calls. Let everyone be on the alert, that those surprises don’t overtake yourselves and loved ones.

The Road to Diamond, Day 93: Ruby Road Beckons

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Posted by on in collaborating, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 1, 2025- The tall, strapping man with a strong, pleasant voice and a genial manner kept about sixty of us captivated for two hours, with songs and stories. Tom Chapin has done this for over fifty years, sometimes alongside his late brother, Harry and younger brother, Steve. Towards the end of last night’s session, Tom mentioned that he would be celebrating his eightieth birthday, in two weeks.

That sparked a chord in me, being nine months shy of 75, and keeping on a relatively straight and narrow health regimen-not really cutting out anything, besides highly processed food. ( I guess that counts for a fair amount). I have an overall game plan of service (continuing here in Prescott, at least for the next six months and wherever I may be, after that) and of travel (Europe, and maybe East Africa, in the early autumn; a project-centered return to the Philippines in December-February; some parts of Latin America for a few months, later next year and wherever I feel directed, after that).

For the longest time, I’ve looked at my potential ninth decade of life as a cypher. Seeing so many, admittedly more sedentary, friends and family become less active and facing health issues has given me pause. That I have met someone who means a great deal to me, even if she is no more than a dear friend, is an incentive to stay active and keep my health regimen. To be honest, I wouldn’t mind reaching the century mark-provided my quality of life is at least close to what it is now. That is not necessarily a pipe dream. Mom made it to 95.5. I hold her own wish to live to see 100 in my heart.

So, one day at a time-yes; but for Kathy, Aram & Yunhee (and any children they may have), my siblings and their children, and for all my dear friends, I look to the diamond mark, then to ruby, granite and 10-Carat Diamond. Whatever is the Will of the Divine.