Giving Is Getting

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December 8, 2025, Banning- Two small piles of notebooks, coloured pencils, a therapeutic colouring book and post cards which had accumulated over the past fourteen years were offered to those gathered at the weekly Soup Kitchen. It took exactly fifteen minutes for six people to go through the offerings and take what suited them, in a discerning manner.

I will be doing more of that, over the ten days left to me to prepare for the move to Plano, especially as most of what I am giving was itself given me, following Penny’s passing, in 2011. Of course, it will largely go to Thrift Stores or to Habitat for Humanity, but new uses will be found for even the most well-worn items.

First, though, is my final visit to Orange County, at least until my granddaughter, whose birth is fourteen days away, attains toddlerhood. With that in mind, I took advantage of an easy clean-up after Soup Kitchen and headed west, through Arizona’s Outback and the Colorado Desert of eastern California. Only a couple of brief incidents coloured the generally smooth trip.

Between Aguila and Wenden, along US 60, there happened to be two rather large deer standing in the road. As Sportage approached, one deer went north and the other dashed south-no collision tonight!

Later, after I topped off the gas tank at Ehrenburg, a Honda Accord appeared to my left, as I was leaving the station-the driver bulling his way onto the road, to get ahead of me. Since he had been right behind a pick-up, I figured they were traveling together and he didn’t want to get separated. That was, until he zipped past the pick-up. Oh, well, we all got to stop, a half-mile further west, at the Ag Inspection. CHP also had a Safety Zone set up, for five miles through Blythe and just beyond, so we were all limited to 60 mph. Sometimes, taking ends up becoming giving, in terms of personal freedom. It’s often better to just go with the flow, at least when it comes to traffic.

From Wiley’s Well onward, the trip was uneventful, and I pulled into a different motel, the Margarita, around 10:15, PST. Tomorrow, I will meet my Orange County friend at Ladera Ranch and share my joys of this past year and the year to come.

Group Assistance

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December 7, 2025- Another holiday party/annual meeting/farewell gathering featured inventive, delicious organic and vegetarian fare-including my mixed greens and sunflower sprouts, with a dressing of lemon curd, Sicilian lemon balsamic and Persian lime olive oil, with a hint of paprika. The dressing was a particular hit with the group- and the host, a Master Chef, asked to keep what was left. Success!!

Part of the business meeting involved discussion of whether to donate funds to a Garden School in Africa, that serves HIV-ridden orphaned children. The group has helped the Director, herself uninfected, for the past three years, so it was not difficult to vote for continuance. We voted to double the amount suggested by our executive committee, with no objection from them. One of our members has been to that school twice, and will visit again, sometime next year.

It is hard for many people here to comprehend, but the conduit member said that HIV is still rampant in that particular part of Africa, as many men are unwilling to use hygienic protection in their intimate activities, leaving their women open to infection, which naturally gets passed on to any progeny. This situation was the basis for HIV-fighting funds from USAID. Now that the prevailing view in our government is that these funds just “reward bad behaviour”, the funds have been reduced, or eliminated, and it will take time for the miscreants to realize that no one is going to rescue them. The children are the ones who end up suffering. So, private groups like ours are taking up the slack-helping women and children directly.

Collective action is far more effective than assorted individuals trying to take up the mantle. Besides, I have to be on deck to focus my energies and resources on family first. I am grateful that projects like this are getting an organizational response.

Reality Checks

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December 5, 2025- The earnest young man said, with a straight face, that he fully intended to finance a new vehicle, using his available income from a part-time job cleaning office buildings around his town. We went over the cost of the desired vehicle, the number of months it would take to pay off a loan-if one were even available and the amount of money he would have to set aside each month, just to pay the loan amount, never mind insurance, registration and maintenance. It didn’t take him long to pivot to calculating the monthly costs involved with purchasing a used car, for 1/4 the amount of a new vehicle.

When I was a similar age, I had a grand uncle who would calmly disabuse me of similar outlandish dreams. He never tried to actively talk me out of any pipe dream, but used facts, numbers and the sort of logic that said “This is all achievable-just some day, not right away.” In running this morning’s round table discussions with juniors and seniors at a local high school, regarding financial planning, I used the same mentoring tools. The students could see that I am still standing, even through a fair number of missteps and setbacks. My ending point was that it is not the mistakes that matter, in the end; it is the aggregate of lessons learned.

This morning, regarding grandparenting, I was reminded that the elder’s greater wisdom shines brightest from the ability to listen to the grandchild; to be the safe haven and by extension, the greatest emotional support. It takes nothing away from parents, but does offer the child another place where s(he) can feel validated. It is that affirmation that builds the emotional strength a person needs, to successfully withstand all manner of negative pressures.

Today’s seminars were a good round of practice in that regard.

Reading the Room

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December 4, 2025- While mostly enjoying a gathering this afternoon, I got the sense that two of the higher-ranking people, in the group with which I have been involved, were not exactly thrilled with my decision to leave the area. A mutual friend said that was off the mark and that the management is actually supportive of my decision and is happy for me. One of the administrators hugged me before leaving, so my reading of the room was not quite on point.

One of the things that has indeed held me back, over the years, is a difficulty in reading people. I came to the conclusion, a while back, that oftentimes when I sense hostility or dislike from someone else, it is more a matter of how I am feeling about myself at the time. Many, if not most, people are neutral-to-supportive. Very few, actually, are hostile-and even if they are, the question begs, “Do I reflect something they don’t like about themselves?

I went to another gathering, this evening, putting these ideas to the test. A person who I previously had considered hostile was actually quite agreeable, jovial. Most of the people at the gathering were engaging and took an interest in one another. I felt at home, and recognized that any tension inside myself right now is likely processing the matter of leaving a place that has been home for fourteen years, and a state that has been home for all but six of the past forty-seven years.

It’s best to let the feelings flow, and know that all will be well, in the weeks to come and in the years that follow. I am getting better, at reading the room.

Tik-Tok

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December 1, 2025, Tucumcari- My friend sat across from me, in a crowded coffee shop, on the west side of Amarillo. He referred, a couple of times, to things he’d seen on Tik-Tok, a medium he finds amusing. A few minutes later, he told of posts on said medium that he found revolting.

I have never been a fan of Tik-Tok,nor of Snap Chat, Reddit or any other medium that relies, for its existence, on mass, conformity-based consumption of whatever drivel the worst among its contributors serves up, particularly in the form of “challenge”. Whoever dreamed up the nightmare that was “Tide Pod Challenge” (before Tik-Tok, in fairness) deserves to be consigned to the scrap heap of historical opprobrium. Its successors, some of which have found their way to Tik-Tok (i.e. Jam Jar Pulse Jet), likewise deserve nothing short of universal condemnation, for the resulting harm they cause both those who attempt them and their loved ones who are left to pick up the pieces of the person(s) left in relative ruin.

Tik-Tok could have become the purveyor of presentations that elevate humanity, the way Wikipedia and, for the most part, TED Talks and You Tube have become. Instead, we have the media promoter of the ethos that is reflected in that most odious of sentiments, “It’s better than Crack!” End of rant.

The day was, all in all, very nice. I bid farewell to my little family, for a few weeks, then found it fairly easy to exit Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex. The drive along Northwest Passage was easy, and I found my lunch stop, Valley Pecans, rather deserted. Somehow, I was about the first customer at that lovely cafe-emporium, and was, thankfully, followed by about a dozen other people. It was Noon, so high time for travelers to surface.

After my visit with friend, Wes, In Amarillo and a fuel stop, I made it to this high desert gem, taking this room at Rodeway Inn and heading to Del’s Diner, one of Tucumcari’s best. Del’s has been around since 1966, and the crowds, such as the one there tonight, are proof of its excellence. Martha and crew treated everyone special, tonight. The regulars attest that this is no fluke. It’s how the crew is every day, every meal. Viva Del’s; viva Tucumcari!

Staying On Point

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November 30, 2025, Grapevine- My sole tasks today were recording measurements of two rooms in the Plano house, using the Notes application on my i-Phone, and doing my laundry. It was not a hard day. Son had to navigate traffic across the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex, as he does almost every day. He had the harder job. There is a fair number of unfocused, impetuous motorists here, as there are in nearly every major city on the planet. He got the job done just fine.

Much of the difficulty facing the human race has come from one or more people, in any given situation, becoming distracted. There are plenty of diversions competing for anyone’s attention, at any given time of the day: Sunrises and sunsets; cute animals; cute babies; text messages; phone calls; road accidents; attractive members of the opposite sex; billboards; alluring announcements on the radio or streaming device; even someone riding a horse on the side of the road. The tasks, though, remain the same: Drive safely; pay attention to the person in front of you; finish what you start.

I think of this, as I plan out one of the most tightly-choreographed months in quite a while. Not since July, 2011 have I had to face a sea change in my living situation. It will need to be done carefully, and attentively, both because of time frame and because the feelings of so many people, who mean a great deal to me, need to be kept in mind. The most important, of course, are my little family. Others also matter, and so December will see lots of hugs and handshakes and “Thank you for being my friend, all these years.” The saving grace, in each instance, is the continuity offered by social media.

All I can promise anyone is that I will stay on point, and get the tasks of transition done, to the every best of my ability, doing justice for all concerned.

The Essentials of 74; The Promise of 75

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November 28, 2025, Grapevine- The road to diamond ended where it began, in the company of my little family, here in Texas’ Christmas City. There was a sense that life would continue as ever, for the three of us, and in preparation for my third visit to the Philippines, I seriously contemplated moving there, being very strongly drawn to a lovely woman and having made several friends during my first two trips to that beautiful, struggling, supremely hospitable country.

I sojourned a lot this year-to the Philippines in February; back to the eastern U.S., in May and across a wide swath of Europe in September and October. In between, my commitment to Prescott continued unabated and many hours of service were recorded. These were the fruits of twelve years of building relationships and friendships, across sectarian and even ideological lines.

The finest thing about both travels and community service came in seeing people take the reins of empowerment to themselves. Filipinos rejuvenating a local Baha’i Center, building a pavilion for an elementary school, and women standing up and saying “Enough” to abusive significant others made my spirit soar. The initial phases of a Baha’i House of Worship, north of Manila were an added bonus.

Northern Arizona became a distinct Red Cross Chapter again this year. I had little to do with the actual achievement, but was able to establish ties between the organization and at least one rural community, east of Prescott. We also reached out to formerly isolated communities in the far northern reaches of the state-albeit as an outcome of a horrific fire that ravaged the magnificent North Rim of the Grand Canyon.

Getting to spend time with friends in several European countries fulfilled an eleven year old promise. Visits to Sweden, Croatia, Ireland and the United Kingdom accomplished that goal. Paying homage to the victims of the Holocaust, at Auschwitz-Birkenau and to those massacred at Srebrenica, Bosnia & Hercegovina was the fulfillment of what I regard as a duty of a citizen of the world. In most places, my presence was evanescent, yet I felt at home, and would not be unwelcome if I returned.

I have reached my diamond jubilee. The day, and this Thanksgiving visit, have been focused on the coming move of my little family and I into a permanent home. Doing things like meeting the tradesmen who will help prepare the house, going over specs and pointing out things that need to be repaired/replaced, shopping for new furniture to replace items that are, in my case at least, nearly fourteen years old-have taken precedence. Once I get back in Prescott, in the middle of next week, the process of dismantling Home Base I begins in earnest. Furniture will need to be sold or given away, as will clothing, books and a variety of household items. Farewells will be said, at gatherings in the Prescott area, in southern California and in the Phoenix area. Farewell, though, is not an eternal goodbye.

Our little one will arrive, sometime in the second half of December. A new era thus starts, along with the beginning of my “fourth quarter”. Other than a visit to the Philippines, at the start of 2026, itself dependent on the baby’s healthy start and her mother’s health, my time at the new Home Base I, from March onward, will be primarily focused on my granddaughter’s care. Gradually, Plano will become my new community. It will not be Prescott-but then again, Prescott was not Jeddito, and Jeddito was not Jeju. Every Home Base has had its draws, its strengths and its undying memories.

The promise of 75 is the promise of guiding a new life, a new human being, who may very well be the embodiment of much that I have wanted to offer the world. The choice, though, will be up to her alone. All her parents and I can do is guide her with love.

The Road to Diamond, Day 364: A Lone Star Northwest Passage

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November 26, 2025, Grapevine, TX- I had breakfast this morning at a new spot on Amarillo’s 6th Street “Fun Zone”: Coffee Fixx. It has superb coffee, and it is the first place I’ve been to in a while that offers Red Hots as a breakfast meat option. For those who wonder, Red Hots are Texas-sized sausage links that have a good, spicy kick. They are a notch above the hot Italian sausage to which I have become accustomed in Prescott.

From Coffee Fixx, I headed down along what I call Texas’ Northwest Passage- a road, or network of roads, from Dallas-Fort Worth to Amarillo and points north and west. It has been my go-to alternative to flying, when the weather is fine, as it is right now. I will depend on the Northwest Passage (US Hwy 287 and Texas Highway 114), when it comes time to bring what is left of my household from Prescott to Plano, in the not-too-distant future.

The Passage has some neat canyons along the way: Palo Duro, which I’ve visited a few times and Caprock, which is actually several canyons, set aside as a State Park, in much the same manner as Palo Duro. Here are a few scenes that presented themselves to me, on the north side of Caprock, this morning.

North side of Caprock (Above, and next few frames)

After viewing Caprock’s features from a Picnic Area, I passed through the Passage’s small, but thriving towns: Childress, Quanah, Chillicothe (struggling, but finding its way back, nicely), Vernon, Iowa Park, and the largest of the region’s cities: Wichita Falls.

After purchasing a gift item for my little family, at Valley Pecans, in Chillicothe, I waited for a lady to get out of the car next to Sportage, then began to back up. I saw a rear door open in a car that was across the way, but whose occupants would have to cross my path to get to the store. A little boy got out, then got back in, then got out again. All the while, I sat there, waiting. When he saw me, he decided to head into the store. Given that he was alone in the car, I’d say that was a good decision he made. In any case, I was not about to move the car until the coast was clear.

After Wichita Falls came Henrietta, Bowie, Alvord, Decatur, Rhome and Roanoke, before Southlake and Grapevine appeared. The near towns of the Passage are becoming exurban, but they still have the feel of independence and newness about them.

In time, the Lone Star Northwest Passage will become as familiar to me as are the Arizona Outback routes to Las Vegas and southern California, the “Lonely Road” from Las Vegas to Reno and the Red Road from Flagstaff to Cortez and Durango. Its communities will be filled with people I consider friends and its sights will be the stuff of the back yard.

Caprock is a good name for one of its signature canyons.

The Road to Diamond, Day 360: Love and Mercy

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November 22, 2025- His voice cracking, and eyes starting to well, R stopped and recovered himself, then continued on with his account of the past five months, since I saw him last. R is one of the friends I will miss after leaving Prescott. He and his wife were among the first to welcome me, in 2011. Their restaurant is one of the mainstays of my life here, once a week, for breakfast or lunch. The shenanigans of the staff or of the locals that sit at the counter are always a hoot. I listened with rapt attention and reflective comments, as R filled me in on his so far successful fight for life. I want to see people win those kinds of battles.

Getting back to Home Base I, I arranged for the delivery of a piece of furniture that I have had re-upholstered. It had been in almost too sorry a condition to even invite people over. Now, it is in beautiful shape and I will be proud to hand it off to someone who needs a nice piece of furniture for their living room. As it happened, the delivery man’s schedule conflicted with my usual stint at Farmers Market, but as my cosmic advisor said of today-“It is a day to go with the flow, when life interrupts routine.” Delivery man and his helper were meticulous in bringing the piece in and getting it in place. They took their time folding their blankets and putting everything back in place.

I went to Farmers Market, anyway, and finding the crew dealing with a long line of vendors, I took care of cleaning and putting away the folding chairs and tables, then made headway in taking down at least some of the tents. It was then time for Baha’i Feast, so I left the nonetheless grateful crew, who by that time were finished with the vendors.

Feast was a cozy affair. We had our devotions and talked of community matters, then planned next month’s activities and enjoyed refreshments. This little community is also a group of people I will miss, having collaborated with them continuously for fourteen years, and having known many of them from our residence here in 1992 and 2000-01. The Baha’i Faith has only been an impetus for my positive growth as a human being.

Finally, I spent the evening at Raven Cafe, enjoying a light dinner and the music of a favourite local band, The Cheektones. Don and the boys have a knack for getting people up an dancing. I occupied an old wooden chair and had the company of a few friends of the band. After about 1 1/2 hours of bouncing in my seat, I got up and joined the dancing to the last two songs. Before I did so, the guys played a song that summed up today, and many days in my life: “Love and Mercy”, the Brian Wilson song from 1988. Here is an earlier performance by The Cheektones, from Prescott’s Summer Music on the Square series.

This is the last of my “two posts a day”, game of catch-up on this blog site. It has been sometimes a challenge, to find a theme for a given day, but from my readership, it seems there are plenty of you who identified with at least some of what has happened here, since my return from Europe.

Life is sweet.

The Road to Diamond, Day 359: An Ounce of Prevention

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November 21, 2025- One of my least favourite phrases in the American lexicon is “It’s better than Crack!” The media’s, and our culture’s, seeming love affair with narcotics, itself an outgrowth of alcohol and tobacco dependency, has long disgusted me. The team with which I worked today had a point, though: “Most people are not addicted to drugs.”

The MATFORCE team was waiting, prepped and ready, for me and more importantly, for the four groups of students we would inform about the uses, caveats and dangers associated with prescription drugs and their illicit/illegal counterparts that are being sold on the streets or by unscrupulous members of the medical profession.

I was guided to take this half-day assignment, probably my last at Mile Hi Middle School, a place where I have had many successful turns as a substitute teacher, over the past fourteen years-and a fair number in earlier periods of residence here. The heading said “Life Skills”, so it seemed well within my purview. Upon arrival in the classroom, I was greeted by her co-teacher from the next classroom, and appraised of the format for the morning. Then I met the MATFORCE team. (The acronym means Mobilizing Action Together for Community Empowerment.) The organization works diligently, across Arizona, to bring factual awareness of the effects of substances on the human body, and on the families and communities that are comprised of those inside all these bodies.

Each person who sat and listened, participated or absorbed the information had a different take. Most took the folder with information home with them. Some didn’t, either because they had the same lessons last year (the 8th graders) or because they just didn’t want extra papers lying around their rooms or in their backpacks. A few may have been spooked by the talk of fake Fentenyl, barbituates and amphetamines. None, however, were unaffected by the lesson.

An ounce of prevention saves a pound of cure.