Category Archives: Personal goals

A Cordillera Sojourn,Day 3: Ili-Likha

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, Historical, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

September 21, 2024, Baguio- The sweet young woman was ecstatic that I had come to view and purchase several of her creations. My goal is to support indigenous artisans, around the Philippines, as I have over the years with Dineh and Hopi people. So, the wood carvings and knits of the Ibaloi lady were right in keeping with that goal. A couple of them will be for K, and one or two will go with me to Arizona.

Ili-Likha Artists’ Watering-Hole is primarily a gathering place for artists and visitors, with several restaurants and cafes. Ili-Likha is a hybrid term: Ili means “village”, in Kankanaey, one of the Igorot languages, and Likha means “create”, in Tagalog. The craft shop I visited, on the first floor of this tree-house like structure, had everything I wanted from this first visit to Baguio. Heaven on Earth, with its vurgers and other vegetarian treats, is right next door. Having had a sumptuous pizza wrap, at Pizza Volante, about 30 minutes prior, I contented myself with a refreshing cold glass of tskolate. (You guessed it, it’s chocolate!)

This evening, enjoying a lovely dinner with my hosts, at Rosevilla Transient House, I left the door open for a return visit to Baguio, later in my hopefully-extended stay in the Philippines, which would let me be in the country until October 26. If so, then my first beeline would be to Tam-awan, which is actually not that far from the guest house. Tam-awan is a living history site, much like many we have in North America (Old Sturbridge, Colonial Williamsburg, L’Anse aux Meadows, Lincoln’s New Salem, etc.) It is certainly an effort well-made, as the Igorot nations deserve to be recognized for the strength and beauty of their culture. They largely resisted the Spanish, and were in fact never completely subjugated-even by the Japanese, during the occupation of 1941-45.

Metro Manila, Day 8: Branching Out

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

September 18, 2024, Manila- Remembering the old saw that goes: “You can’t tell if someone is disabled, just by looking at him”, I nonetheless walked past the muscular young man who was sitting on the sidewalk, holding out a paper cup. I don’t, as a matter of course, reward begging. There are cases where I will purchase snacks, especially packaged ones, from street vendors. That constitutes reward for some kind of work. Sorry, not sorry, but begging is not work.

I decided to give my friends at the Baha’i Center some space today, and opted to walk about 5 kilometers total, from Ola! Hostel to the light rail station at Vito Cruz, and from Gil Puyat station to Libertad, which took me past the Metro Manila World Trade Center. From Libertad, I took the light rail back to Vito Cruz, then walked to Ola!

World Trade Center, north of Ninoy Aquino International Airport (above and below)

Most people were just going about their business, and did not pay me any mind. A little girl asked if I needed any help, when I stopped to put my camera back in its sleeve. It was kind of her, but I was making myself feel useful and capable, so I continued on-and she went back to wherever she had been people watching.

After doing my laundry, in advance of tomorrow’s bus ride to Baguio, I sent a message to Kathy, touching base about the arrangements she had made for said ride. The answer came back that the information would be at the Baha’i Center, so I went there after all, in the evening. She brought the paperwork, after a fashion, and I saw the work that had kept her busy, these past few days: A thick binder of documents. This woman is nothing, if not dedicated and the work was largely done. I sat with her and several others, a conversation dovetailing between English and Tagalog ( the latter of which I could only understand a smidgen). Were it not for tomorrow’s activities, which start with an early morning Zoom call, I could have sat and talked for hours. It was, at least an hour well-spent, talking about the Baha’is of the United States, and our schools/institutes.

Bend a little, and get a lot in return. Show independence, and get support.

Metro Manila, Day 7: The Envelope Girl

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Posted by on in collaborating, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

September 17, 2024, Manila- The little girl clutched her assigned supply of envelopes and note cards with one hand and held onto my arm with the other. She desperately wanted to get some pocket change, which I could have spared-but for the fact that a boy appeared, also carrying envelopes and note cards-and it is pretty much guaranteed that ten more “vendors”, along with a few pickpockets, would have surfaced, in short order. I walked along, with a platonic friend who is like a sister to me, and the little angel still clinging to my arm. No one got anything from me, and after I said “Palaam” (goodbye), at the corner, the pair hung back, looking surprised, but resigned.

Many of us, in the course of our lives, are like the Envelope Girl and her partner in grift. We hope for something from another person-whether it is commerce, approval, friendship or even some level of romance. Sometimes-oftentimes, we can get what we want. On other occasions, the answer is “No”, or “Maybe, just not right now”.

I have been both seeker and sought, plenty of times. Growing up, I was a well-liked, but never loved, adolescent-a permanent resident of what is nowadays called “The Friend Zone”.

There is no Friend “Zone”. There are only friends, those towards whom one feels fondly, with whom one is glad to share good times, thoughts and experiences. There are levels of friendship, from “acquaintance” (whatever that is) to a marital bond-and many levels in between. I can’t, however, recall any person in my life who has been consigned to a limited, stifling place in my world. There have been false friends, whose design was either transactional (like the street urchins above) or vengeful(their whole shtick being to teach me a lesson). Those have been let go, blocked/deleted. There have been those who have been physically attracted to me, but the converse has not been true-and we have managed to build solid, platonic/fraternal bonds. The same is true of many to whom I have been drawn-and the converse has also been true.

At the top of the scale, there are two: Penny, my departed wife, and a person to whom I have made several references, of late. Penny was, when we first met, immediately in full-on attraction mode, (as was I, to her). That settled into a period of retraction, during which she had space to deal with residual feelings towards former beaux, a dalliance with a more dashing suitor and sorting out all manner of conflict between making a commitment and having “freedom”. My feelings never went away, but I stayed in the background, as long as she needed me to. After 18 months, we were married, had a solid, if sometimes stormy, wedlock and I was by her side through it all-including thirteen years of physical and cognitive decline, as I have described in earlier posts.

I met K last year, and had the same immediate attraction. Time will tell, if the friendship will approach the level that Penny and I reached. There are many variables, and all I can say is that my feelings aren’t going away, even as my person gives her the space that I gave Penny. A beloved soul deserves no less. Our lives will continue, will remain full and our goals-both mutual and separate-will be achieved. No two people, no matter how drawn to one another, can possibly meld into a unit where one is indistinguishable from the other. “Between them is a barrier that they overpass not.”-Baha’u’llah.

It has been a wonderful ride, to this point. I’m here, if she needs me.

Metro Manila, Day 3: No Place for Bad Luck

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Entertainment, Family, Historical, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

September 13, 2024, Manila- There are two schools of thought about Friday the 13th. One holds that both Friday and the number 13 augur badly. The other counters with the cultural artifact that the day is named for Freya, Norse goddess of love, war and fertility. It also is deemed unlucky, in Norse mythology, as Loki the Trickster was the thirteenth Norse god.

The Vikings may have given themselves reason to be conflicted about Friday the 13th, but I personally have never had any hard luck associated with the day. This day was no different. I was able to extend my time at Ola! Hostel, my dear friend arranged a nice group outing for tomorrow, as well as help me get a bus ticket for a visit to central Luzon, late next week. and I was able to join a study group from Arizona online.

Most of the day was quotidian, otherwise, but that has never been a bad thing. I helped with shopping, at an open air market and house sat, while the Baha;i Cnter’s caretaker went to tend to another matter.

Every day, loud or quiet, has its advantages.

Metro Manila, Day 1: Joy, in The Midst of Fatigue

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

September 11, 2024, Manila- The young couple must have been amused, watching me go through the same pockets of my well-worn pack, several times, before finding what was needed for a small task, whilst waiting for the final leg of my flight: Hong Kong-here.

Such things happen, after five hours of sleep on a trans-oceanic journey. I chose to do this, so will take full responsibility. It was still a lovely day. The flight was 2/3 full, and the ambiance was casually business-like. We even had a light lunch served-unusual, on a short hop.

My dear friend was occupied with matters of domestic drudgery, so I didn’t get to see her, but we communicated happily back and forth. There will be much time for get-togethers, in the days ahead. I did visit with one of our friends, after settling in at Ola! Hostel, which will be my Home Base for several days, while I am in Manila. I was able to help said friend with setting up an appointment, next week, to handle a long-standing concern. It took a little bit of memory jogging, to locate the Baha’i Center, after a year’s absence, and being a bit “on fumes”. I finally also was able to sort out the Philippine peso coins from random Euros that somehow got mixed in the Peso jar.

It’s humid here, but not as stiflingly hot as in the height of summer. I will do more walking as, despite the entreaties of a car rental tout, I have absolutely no plans to drive anywhere in the Philippines. The bus, jeepney and taxi drivers have my full confidence-they grew up here and can handle what seems to me to occasionally be chaos.

On this otherwise solemn, and fatigue-filled, day, I felt joy at being back in another happy place.

A Short and Important Day

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Technical stuff, Travel

September 10, 2024, Hong Kong– What’s today’s date? That was not a “senior moment” question for me. Rather, it was one that was brought into my consciousness by the International Date Line. Longitude is our arbitrary tool for measuring time on Earth, as it helps track the “westward movement” of the Sun. So, we left Los Angeles at 1:15 a.m., PDT and crossed into September 11, a scant five hours into the day. Thus today “lasted” only until 6 a.m., PDT, or 3 a.m., Hawaii Standard Time.

One of my favourite ladies messaged me, with some ideas about at least the first few days of my visit across the waters. My first favourite lady would have turned 96 today. Both took up a goodly amount of my thought and heart energy today. The first favourite was fond of the second, though they never met. Mom just liked what she knew of K’s heart. For that matter, another favourite lady, my late wife, has sent only positive inklings about my newest friendship.

I handled the long flight (13 hours) by getting up and stretching, especially when the knees felt stiff after sitting for a stretch. Five hours of sleep at a time also kept me functional, when the short learning curve of navigating Hong Kong International Airport’s transfer system presented itself. It’s actually not that hard: Just go through security inspection again..This is a great crossroad of the world, and a city that is worthy of a visit, in and of itself-at a later date.

This has been one of the rare occasions when I have become closer to people from mainland China, and it was a pleasant revelation. Chinese people take care of themselves first, by and large, but are not ruthless or crass about it. They are not always intuitive, but I am not sure I would be either, if there were 1.1 billion compatriots underfoot.

Cathay Pacific Airlines has efficient counter and flight staff. The food is varied, and fresh-and in just the right portion size, for a sizable crowd that is mostly sitting for 13 hours. It was not a hard flight; at least not for me.

So a lot was packed into this short day-as it ever will be, as long as I have all my facuties.

A Healthy Spine

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Posted by on in Assistance, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

September 4, 2024- The kids guessed as to my age, early this afternoon: Base was 52 and top was 87. (One guessed closely-72.) These were ten-year-olds, so there we are. When I was ten, anyone older than my Dad (33) was over the hill. These children cut me a lot of slack.

More authoritative was my chiropractic exam-the spine and nerves are in solid state, from top to bottom. This is the last physical exam until next year, save a dental check in December, so with continuance of the current regimen, I will be just fine-as 74 approaches.

Also gratifying, on this short and sweet work day, were having my Home Base minders to dinner this evening, at a quality Italian restaurant; getting in a solid workout at Planet Fitness and learning how to edit a sent e-mail, and send the revision out to all parties, without starting from scratch. Son is back from his annual Reserve training, so there is one less item of concern.

The number of boxes left to check on the trip preparation list is down to three or four: Last day of work is tomorrow, Sportage pre-storage maintenance is on Friday and I will get a fresh haircut in the next day or so. There will be several social and semi-business gatherings, between now and Monday noon; then I will head to Phoenix and beyond.

No Scrap Heap

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

August 29, 2024- “What of us, who are also your friends?”, the voice from 7,500 miles away came, through the medium of the printed Message. This was in reply to my statement that I surely must consult with my dear friend and with Faith community sponsors, before setting an itinerary for service work and other visits, a scant fourteen days from now.

That, however, does not inherently leave anyone out of my life. The Universe has a way of bringing people together when they are supposed to connect. My activities, both here at Home Base I and across North America, especially this year, have fallen into place at precisely the right time for all concerned. I have no reason to believe it will be any different during the upcoming sojourn in the Philippines. The only thing for certain is that, as always anymore, I am determined to not be a burden to anyone. Consultation will help obviate such a state of affairs.

The bottom line is, no one need feel consigned to the scrap heap. We need one another, more than ever, in this time of rapid change, which is likely to only accelerate over the next sixteen months, or longer. Lack of consultation and dearth of appreciation, breed conjecture, false narratives, conspiracy theories and outright mistrust. I will most likely have time to visit with the querulous friend. The visit will fall into the place that it is meant to occupy.

Focus and Count

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Posted by on in Community, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Technical stuff

August 28,2024- Her head spinning, the excitable teen threw up her hands and announced she was too stupid to figure how to do Scientific Notation. Looking at the arcane samples written on the white board, I could see where she, and several others, had come to that conclusion.

It’s not them; it’s the system of instruction. Focusing on maintaining order, I vowed to look up the matter in the quiet of my Home Base. So, should one want to write the number 168,275,000 in Scientific Notation, it would be necessary to move the decimal point (presently after the right-most zero) far enough to the left that the whole number,1, is followed by .68275000. Then, count the digits to the right of the decimal point. There are eight of them. This translates to 1.68275000 x 10 to the eighth power, or ten with an exponent of 8 . This laptop will not write it properly, but anyone who has had Algebra I knows what I mean. I will write it on the white board for all to see, tomorrow.

Focus and count is also necessary, when trying to make a rational, evidence-based decision that balances a heart conviction. Many men in their late teens and twenties have spoken of wanting to see a decisive, “macho” leader, who will, essentially, make the trains run on time-and shove all obstacles aside. That was tried, nearly a hundred years ago, in several countries of Europe. It’s been tried in several other countries since, with limited results, actually.

Historical evidence shows that human nature gets in the way of a machine-like system that knocks all obstacles to the side. The “macho” leader is still a human being and is subject to whims, fancies, and other emotions, which can and do make him/her go overboard. The leader, for example, may misjudge the nature of a an event or a phenomenon, convincing self and supporters that their way is the only way to get through the morass. The problem itself being complex, there are disappointments, setbacks and unrest that come before its resolution, and thinking outside the box, something often anathema to the authoritarian, to the hidebound elders and the unseasoned youth who support his/her efforts, is exactly what is needed to resolve the issue.

The same thing can happen with a top-heavy bureaucracy, which will, in its turn, bring another call for an authoritarian system. Red-tape vendors don’t like divergence of opinion, either. The fact remains, though, that the universe of problems can only be soothed by exactly such diversity. There are matters that can only be resolved by a trusted executive; others that require limited, but vigourous, debate and consensus and others that demand universal participation.

Many matters require that those involved focus, and count.

Those Others

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 25, 2024- I went over to a pub where a friend works, but found friend was off-shift. I hadn’t been back there for some time, but enjoyed my usual: Non-alcoholic brew with a BLTA (bacon, lettuce, tomato and avocado). I don’t stay long, as the pace in that particular establishment is quite frenetic, not really a spot for conversations; it’s more for watching football games, or maybe the World Series, in October.

I mention this, because so much of our contact with others is fleeting. I tend to view people as friends, even when I don’t see them often. Some use the term “acquaintances”, which seems to me to be rather cold, though it’s a fair description of store clerks, or random people, with whom I interact maybe once or twice.

I just don’t see people as “others”. Their wants, needs and aspirations are just as valid as mine. This occurs to me in most, if not all, situations-from looking behind me to see if someone else needs to get through a door, turn into a parking lot which I may be crossing on foot, or approaching rapidly, (in which case I need to make a quick assessment of what the person may be trying to accomplish). This last rarely happens anymore. It’s also a good idea to be looking in all four (or five) directions, when driving, as any given motorist could be engaged in any number of tasks, or headed for any number of destinations, experiencing any number of emotions. It is often described as “maddening”, but that is a big reason why I leave a lot of time between leaving where I am parked and where I am headed.

There is also the quality of interactions between my friends and I. Any one of us could be going through a plethora of emotional stresses, which we just might not want to lay on a given person-so taking the measure of a person’s body language, heeding their request to NOT speak of a given subject and cutting her/him some slack when a less than congenial vibe is offered are each key to continuing said friendship, if not strengthening it. Even silence, for a period of time, is not a red flag of impending separation.

I get on better, when not thinking “That’s THEM, that’s THOSE OTHERS, not me”. We’re all in the bubble.