Tag Archives: authenticity

The Road to Diamond, Day 49: Move Without Fear

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Posted by on in Assistance, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

January 16, 2025- The woman sitting across from me at lunch was unequivocal: “Asking people to vote for a woman of colour for President was a waste of time.” She went on further, looking at other races that did not go to her liking, and concluding that it is best to conserve money and energy to only run candidates in races that they have a chance of winning.

Conventional practices bring conventional results-until they don’t. I have a lifetime of “punching above my weight”, with checkered results. Looking back, though, my regrets are primarily due, not to taking on challenges, but to lack of preparation and of self-confidence. I have also been guilty of placing too much trust in those who have, in retrospect, given every indication that they had no intention of acting honestly. Following a tack of business as usual has not ended well, in such circumstances. Yet, here we are.

Elections are a basic part of life in a free society, but they are only a part. The hard work of citizenship, if it is to meet with success, has to cast the conventional out, when it no longer works. Typecasting people, by race and/or gender, is an idea that no longer works, if indeed it ever did. Limiting effort, by placing too much emphasis on money and time, especially on the former, is more a reflection of fear and fatigue than on meeting the actual needs of our society-as it exists now. Holding meetings in secret and consigning decisions to a select few is a shopworn idea, counterproductive to progressives and conservatives alike. This last would be well remembered by those who are “okay” with government by oligarchs, who by the way, may be found on both ends of the political spectrum.

Finally, there is the same hand-wringing I have heard, about “what’s wrong with the young people?”, that I’ve heard since I was a teenager myself. Heck, similar messages have been translated from hieroglyphics! What I hear from younger people is that they respect authenticity, above all else. That’s no surprise, given that the primary job of a young human is self-discovery. Fakery is lethal to someone just starting out in life. The second most important quality to youth is courage. Left, right, in -between, fearlessness is what will bring one across the finish line.

Stand tall, keep head and eyes clear and heart open. The world cannot progress, covered in yesterday’s dust.

Be A Tiger

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, Fiction, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 16, 2024- Joseph Campbell, in his 2003 book, Myths of Light, ends his discourse on Eastern religions and thought with the story of “The Tigers and the Goats”. It seems that a pregnant tiger was out seeking food, for herself and her baby. She came upon a herd of goats. Charging and pouncing too hard, she landed roughly, laboured and gave birth, then died.

The goats took pity upon the helpless tiger cub, raised him as one of their own, teaching him to eat grass and bleat. He had no idea there was any difference between him and the goats, though he felt a discomfort. One day, a male tiger came along and charged at the goats, roaring and snarling. The genuine goats scattered, while the tiger-goat stood facing his larger nemesis.

The wise older cat listened, as the tiger-goat explained that he was a grass-eater, a goat. The grown tiger took the juvenile by the neck, led him to a pond and showed him his true likeness. Then he brought his new apprentice to his den, where other tigers were reveling in eating a gazelle they had killed. The young tiger struggled with the meat, but something inside him felt right, and he stayed with the group, learning to seize his true nature.

Each of us should be our true selves. A frugal person, who treasures conserving the best of tradition, cannot pass as a spendthrift or as a free-spirited innovator, without feeling that something is off. Likewise, an innovator, a progressive, fools no one by demanding that tradition be maintained, at all costs. Each can, and hopefully will endeavour to, see the value in what the other is doing, and work to find common ground.

The introvert needs time alone. The extrovert craves company and an expanded network. Most others, like myself, toggle between the two states of being, as ambiverts. Society needs all three personality types.

This is the balance, rooted in the love that was imbued in us by the Divine. We will ever have the process of reaching out, expanding and welcoming more to our circle, then taking time to consolidate and absorb the best of that expansion into our systems.

If you are a tiger, be fierce. If you are an ox, be taurine. If you are a goat, graze peacefully. There is space for all.

Gratuities

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 14, 2021- The male hairstylist looked puzzled, as I told him I had an appointment with one of his colleagues. He had cut my hair once before, and done a fine job. The shop, however, lets whoever takes the phone call claim a customer for themselves. So, I found myself in K’s chair, and she did a wonderful job, as well, taking extra care. In the end, I again thanked Navy retiree, H, for his service, which at least made his day a bit better.

Many times, it is worth both time and energy to offer gratuities. Usually, they involve small amounts of money, but words and acts of kindness are often just as valued by the receiver. Common courtesies, which ought to be part of everyone’s repertoire, are a prime example. God knows, the few times that I have been self-absorbed and not looked behind me, when going through a door, and just let it close, have had me eating crow.

Where gratuitousness becomes a problem is when it is at variance with one’s own deepest ethical convictions. The late Senator J. William Fulbright, of Arkansas, voted against the Civil Rights Act of 1964, despite his belief that it was necessary to the good of the nation. His vote was in a dubious solidarity with his archconservative colleague, John McClellan. Fulbright almost immediately thereafter told the press: “I’m glad we lost”. It is academic, as to what Fulbright’s true beliefs on racial equality were, and his gratuitousness towards both his White Supremacist colleagues and the Black community of Arkansas only muddied the waters, in the latter years of his tenure.

I have seen all sorts of similar behaviour, from both public figures and people in relationships. It is said that this is needed to “maintain peace in the house”. There is a growing ability, especially among younger people, to see right through such statements and actions. Youth has always been a time for wanting things to be seen as they are-and to make changes based on that reality.

Maybe that is why the presence of authentic people is still so important to me.

Samaritans

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual

April 9, 2021- There is a story of a man from Samaria, a region of what is now Syria and known for its enmity with Judea. The story goes that he stopped to help an injured man, on the side of the road, after the man had been left to die, by bandits. From his kind actions, we get the term Good Samaritan. Over time, “samaritan” has come to mean someone who helps strangers who are in difficulty, often stranded in a remote area.

There are many stories of people coming to the aid of the unfortunate. There are all kinds of samaritans: Some, with low self-esteem, seek praise, adulation, recognition and even a reward of some sort. Others may keep a tally sheet, and while paying it forward, seek recompense later. There is the “no-good-deed-goes unpunished” crowd-wanting any misdeeds to be overlooked, just because “on balance” they have helped some people, sometimes. The key to authenticity is knowing just how well one accounts for transgressions, without falling back on what one might have done for others.

I can only make sense of one course for my own state of being. Yes, I know there have been times when I have done good for people, without being asked. There have also been times when people have been hurt, on my account. The one good thing about “samaritan” acts is that no one needs to know about them, other than the recipients of such help. They need not speak of it.

Keeping the Fire

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

January 29, 2021- One of the things about the pandemic is that those of us who are officially retired from work are still needed in our professions. This is the sort of thing which happens, especially to nurses and physicians, but also to teachers, EMTs and a variety of people in supporting roles. So, I have gone in, to cover for those sidelined by COVID-19, those who have pandemic-related medical appointments and a few other situations.

One of the features of working with children, in the present environment particularly, is what I see as the need to encourage young people to stand their ground, to speak their truth clearly and not be cowed by any attempts, by ANYONE, to intimidate them into letting go of what they know is deserved. This does not mean that a child should be taught to act in an unbridled and irresponsible manner.

When a person, of any age, does speak the truth to a situation, it is the mark of authenticity, for anyone who hears that truth, to have the speaker’s back. In this school, particularly, those who have stood up and insisted, properly, that matters be handled a certain way have been my greatest allies and have made all the difference between the good days I have had and days that might have gone off the rails.

Even in the rough-edged years, of the 2000s, I still recall those forthright children whose outspoken and compassionate manners bridged the gap between my shakiness and being able to pull things together , not wasting the class’s time. With all to which this generation of students is being asked to endure, that forthrightness, that fortitude that flame, needs to be enkindled more than ever before.

I remain on call, for this, and other acts of community service.

The Road to 65, Mile 245: Fragmentation

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Posted by on in Personal goals, Social

July 31, 2015, Prescott- I had a lot of time to think, today, about the recent controversy over whether it is possible to care about animals, when so many people are suffering.  This is the dream of the charlatan:  Get people fighting over compassion, like toddlers over toys.  Then, with everyone screaming at one another, ad nauseam, achieve the power-building agenda, sight unseen.

For the record, I care, equally, about wild animals, fetuses, children, teenagers, women’s sense of well-being and dignity, men’s sense of being relevant, maintaining a healthy environment and a healthy diet, and  my own personal growth.  It is called living a full and balanced life.

No one, not the advocates of one cause or another, nor their opponents, nor least of all the wirepullers, who would be thrilled to see total confusion and lack of progress, lest their seats of power become upended, will get me to favour one of the above, to the detriment of the others.  We can’t care about everything, simultaneously, but we can take time for each – just as we eat at certain times, then do our jobs, then rest, then exercise, then play with our children or pets, then read,  then sleep.  What parent worthy of the name exclusively attends to one of their children, and ignores the others?  It is the same with the various aspects that present themselves to us.

I care, intensely, that whales  and lions are being slaughtered for sport; that people are videotaped making glib comments about dead fetuses (though the authenticity of these videos is suspect); that armed criminals can blend in with mothers and children, cross an international border (for a second time, after having been deported) and kill innocent people at point-blank range; that religious zealots can oppress people, at will; that many women, and more than a few men, feel disempowered by capriciously-applied rules and regulations.

I was born caring, and will stay that way.