Tag Archives: bullying

The Road to Diamond, Day 272: Sacred Space

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, Community, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 27, 2025- A House of Worship should be a sacred space; so should a school. For that matter, a family home should be sacrosanct, as should any place where the occupants are engaged in service to the community-whether paid or unpaid.

It is a tradition, in several faiths, that the human body is the throne to the temple of the spirit. This, alone, is reason enough for each of us to hold self-respect and respect every other person with whom we come in contact. Mild humour aside, casting aspersions on anyone for physical attributes or harmless personality traits, is hardly a mark of respect. Besides, a joke is a joke only if the butt of the punchline is secure enough to laugh along. (I went through a few rough patches, being somewhat humourless at some stages of my youth and young adulthood. Gaining self-confidence erased that dourness.) Intentional physical and psycho-social assaults on another person will eventually boomerang on society-at-large.

These two aspects of life, the sacredness of so much in this world and the fact that many are cast aside or subjected to ridicule or marginalization, often lead to tragedies, mass casualty events, such as today’s horrific assault on a Roman Catholic congregation, in the middle of a worship service. There is never an excuse for wanton murder. There is likewise, no excuse for bullying someone because of personality features or social status.

Sacred is sacred.

The Road to Diamond, Day 242: Making Room

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

July 28, 2025- On the way back from Coffee Klatsch, this morning, I passed the scene of an accident, at a surface street intersection. There were six bystanders helping, so I kept on going. A police car was en route to the scene, as I reached a block south. To be clear, I would have stopped and rendered what aid I could, had I been among the first on the scene. We make room for other people in our lives, without crowding theirs.

Towards evening, I witnessed a conflict between two men. Larger men than I stepped in and separated the two. One was escorted out of the building and the other stayed around, and cooled off. I later talked with the guy who stayed. I learned that he has been pushed around by people in the community, for some time. He also expressed gratitude for those of us who have treated him well. We are seen as more important, in his life, than the bullies-some of whom I know for a fact have been pushed around, themselves.

We are at a crossroads in our social being. Many have found themselves in a position where they are not sure whether their long-held convictions even make sense anymore. Some will just double down on those tenets and see where that leads. Others will seek to expand their mindsets, even turning their backs on the tried and true. In each case, though, none should merely be set aside nor should they be banned from expressing selves.

I could expand on this further, but for now, let’s just say that I am hard-wired to support the Big Tent. It’d be a sadder world, if everything were streamlined and homogenized-or even brought into a state of limited and forced-choice. Anything that doesn’t lead to the hurting of innocents or the vulnerable is on the table.

Not So Hard to Handle

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Posted by on in Community, Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

May 26, 2022- The truth should not be so hard to handle. There are times when it is not exciting, when it doesn’t fit the narrative that’s in our heads and when it challenges us to rethink our worldviews.

It should not be so hard to comprehend that a living being in the womb, is not a creature whose existence depends on being convenient to others. How much more does that extend to a child who has come into being, breathing on on his/her own! How much more does that apply to a woman who has to make the most difficult decision of her life, without necessarily enjoying the support of those around her! How much more does that apply to a young man who is told, time and again, that he is a worthless piece of crap-but he can still buy a weapon and prove himself that way! It should not be hard to handle the truth, that every being put on this Earth-or sent out into the Universe, is here for a valid reason.

A United States Senator today observed that there is a lack of spirituality behind much of what is going on around us. He is not wrong, in that respect. There can, and must, be a balance between loving our Creator and valuing all that has been given us to enjoy, to treasure. Indeed, it is because the Creator gave us raw materials, intelligence, health and the means to live, in this training ground of the human spirit, that we are free to place value on all that is in, and of, this world-in a balanced way. We are free to value the people around us. We are free to value what has been incorporated in ourselves.

I cannot look upon the faces of those departed on May 24, 2022, without aching for the strength that shines out of their faces, any more than I can look upon the faces of everyone departed on December 14, 2012, February 14, 2018, April 20, 1999 and every.other.date that is etched in infamy. That slaughter, that waste, is what is hard to handle.

It all happens because too many cannot handle the truth.

Microaggression

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Posted by on in distraction issues, impediments, Social, Striving

April 2, 2019-

The other night, whilst visiting one of my best friends, I watched and listened to a speech by the conservative commentator, Ben Shapiro.  Among the social phenomena he noted was the trend towards condemning “microaggression”.  The term is used to describe remarks or gestures that trigger unpleasant feelings, discomfort or fear in people who are experiencing , or whose forebears have suffered, oppression.

I was treated, in junior high school, primarily, but also when in the Army, stateside, to a modest amount of bullying and verbal taunting, due to my autism.  I sometimes pondered what society would be like, were it to be rendered illegal to ridicule or belittle another person.  I came to the conclusion that, while it would a fine thing if people were to choose freely, as a society, to rise above such behaviours, to codify criticism as an offense, with criminal penalties, would only drive negativity underground.

To be sure, there are words and phrases that don’t belong in an enlightened society’s discourse.  Racial, ethnic and gender-based slurs are things I banished from my own vocabulary, when I was about 17, to the extent I ever used them at all.  Getting to know people on an individual basis, without pre-conceived notions, has been the only way I have achieved any personal growth, in my own right.

Last October, I found myself, mercifully only for a short time, in a veritable microaggression bootcamp, where every single word, behaviour or gesture that came from me was analyzed, castigated, sliced and diced, to the point I was leery of even taking a breath sideways.  The individual doing this determined that I was beyond redemption, and I was dismissed from her presence.   Mind you, I went through this at the behest of a friend, who was likewise deemed irredeemable.

None of us walks on water.  No matter how loving one’s heart is, and how consistently one shows that love, there will always be someone, somewhere, to whom one is a bete-noire.  It’s helped me, to be more present and aware of the deepest feelings and insecurities of others.  It has also helped me to have grown a thick skin, over the past many years.  “Microaggressions”, it seems to me, are best rooted out through calm, but firm, dialogue and education.  Shrillness and stridency, as Mr. Shapiro pointed out, only drive unkempt behaviour and rhetoric underground, into the maw of the Dark Web or the shadier places in the legitimate Internet.