Tag Archives: continuum

The Road to Diamond, Day 166: Preferences

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Posted by on in Community, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

May 13, 2025, Oley, PA- I was asked whether I prefer one family member over another, one generation over the others and, for that matter, one nationality of people over the rest. Basically, I do not indulge in any of that.

In terms of what the U.S. Vice President said, not long ago, about the rank order or priority of love that a person can show, there is something of a natural order by which one shows love. This, to me, is the truncated pyramid or perhaps the high rise structure, or even just a continuum, of caring and affection that I feel. Of course, I tend to myself and my own needs first, so that others don’t have to. My son, daughter-in-law and, in time, grandchild(ren) come next. My siblings and extended biological family follow, and on it goes through community, state and nation. The rest of humanity is hardly left out, though-dear friends live in several countries around the world.

I was asked whether I would have to choose one set of relationships over another. Each of the people involved know that I would not exclude them for the sake of those in another set. I have to divide my physical time as equally as possible, and there are tools for that. The use of technology makes such things much easier than they would have been say, even ten years ago. Being able to be in one place and deal equitably with people who are elsewhere is a godsend. I was able to sit here in a friend’s house, this afternoon, and meet with other friends in Arizona. I can send a birthday gift to a dear friend in the Philippines, without too much trouble, from the comfort of any given locus in the U.S.

Most important to keeping equity in relationships though, is deferred attention-and transparency. Those who have high emotional needs can be made to feel understood and comforted, without my having to give them day-long, or hours-long attention, to the detriment of on what else and who else I need to focus. Being able to meet individually with family pr friends helps to strengthen my bond with them, and underscores that they are important to me, in and of themselves.

These thoughts come to mind, as I sit contentedly in an old country kitchen.

The Road to Diamond, Day 12: Like-Minded

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 10, 2024- The repast was astonishing, bringing back memories of banquets in Taiwan, and of the full East Asian buffets that gave us comfort, in the hard times of the 2000s. The seven of us who gathered this afternoon are, to varying degrees, of progressive mind. There are, therefore, differing feelings among us, as to what awaits in the next four years. I see much good in the ethics of inclusion and sharing that my dining companions espouse. The rub, though, is in the shallowness of their politics.

It is my firm conviction that there is common ground among all people, and that it is worth the effort to bring that common ground to the fore. It is a mistake to give up and retreat, in the belief that there is an “other side”, with which it is impossible to reason. It is a mistake to assume that there is nothing to talk about, with that “other side”. I only see a continuum, with no barriers save the ones we choose to erect, either out of fear or exasperation. Those who are afraid, need backup and reassurance. Those who are exasperated should rest and gather their thoughts and feelings.

I thought of this again tonight, as we Baha’is gathered for a Spiritual Feast. We are all of differing backgrounds, mindsets and places on the political spectrum, yet there can be no animosity, where there is true unity of commitment to the Oneness of Mankind. It’s hard work, and it may take our species a thousand years to accomplish. The legwork, though, is going on now, and cannot be kicked down the road.

Like-minded people are always gathering, and will eventually bring in other like-minded people. No one needs to be left out.