Tag Archives: sobremesa

Time to Stay Put

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Family, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

January 3, 2026- It is a fine thing,sobremesa, the practice of sititng at the dinner table after a meal and having deep conversation. I’ve missed that, for the most part, over the past several years, only spending time in such a manner when with friends at restaurants. Now, this promises to be a nightly occurrence.

This evening’s talk touched briefly on the implications for the military, and its reserves, of today’s action in Venezuela, and possible other drastic moves in the weeks and months ahead. It also affects my intended visit to the Philippines. That is now postponed, indefinitely. My family’s sensibilities and the wider world’s instability have converged. There is, quite frankly, too much that is new: Hana, the house and her parents returning to work-albeit from home. I would be neither comfortable nor present being away from any of it.

There will again be a time when I will feel good about traveling, especially with family, domestically, and even going abroad, a few years hence. Now, though, my sense of adventure and equilibrium are focused on helping close to home and ensuring that a precious little girl gets off to a good start in life.

There is a lot one learns about oneself only when going through a novel situation.

The Road to Diamond, Day 104: Efficiency

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 12, 2025, San Diego- The bow-tied server had my friend and I seated, took drink orders and was on the spot to take our meal orders, as soon as we put down the menus. The meal was delivered, fresh and hot, within fifteen minutes of our orders. On the flip side, he took our plates once they were empty and had check to table, and processed, within five minutes of taking my friend’s plate. Of course, once his work for us was done, we were free to sit in sobremesa for as long as we pleased. (This is the tradition of relaxing at table, after a meal has concluded.)

The lunch at Corky’s, in Ladera Ranch, northeast of San Clemente, was a prime example of intelligently executed efficiency-not plowing ahead, almost mindlessly, but carrying out one’s task with due consideration of everyone who is affected. Alberto, our server, deserves recognition for this. He probably would say it is the normal course of his work, but there we are.

I don’t always manage to get tasks done with the intelligently executed efficiency I would like. Sometimes, there are too many moving parts for the time frame that is established or I have too many items on my agenda. If others are involved, and their decision-making process is too fluid or changeable, I have to double back and find at least one or two work-arounds, just in case the process starts to look like Whack-a-Mole. If I have not given myself enough time, or rest, to be at my peak, it looks like I have my own game of Whack-a-Mole. Things are getting better, though, with allowing more time and focus.

I learn a lot from people like Alberto, and so paying attention to how others go about their jobs has reaped me a fair number of dividends. Things like overseeing a Red Cross shelter simulation, this coming Saturday or setting up a Baha’i election, to be held in mid-April, with notices sent out within the next week or so, are matters that require intelligent efficiency. For that matter, simpler and more quotidian tasks that affect other people deserve the same.

It’s fascinating what one can learn-when own leisure is the basis of someone else’s effort.