I’ve talked about relationships, around these parts, ad nauseam- most recently, last summer. The reader may expect no confessional drivel this time. I want to look at two things, in this post: Expectations and delivery.
This piece focuses on adult relationships. Teens are pretty good at working out their own bugs, and besides, none of them have asked my opinion lately, anyway. Come to think of it, NO ONE has asked my opinion lately. A friend asked me for some Viagra, not long ago, but I’ve never used the stuff- and the only part of me that even used lubrication recently was my car.
Well, back to the stuff of life. When I was a tumbleweed seeking rootedness, about 4o years ago, I would fuss and fume at any girl who didn’t immediately recognize my awesomeness, from ten miles away. That just made the ladies and their friends laugh that much louder.
Relationships now, are more balanced. One has to start with one’s relationship with self. I have come to the conclusion that I would be a positive addition to many people’s circles of friends. I am comfortable being in this house, alone, for days on end- when need be. That really has to happen first; otherwise, the Nuisance Meter starts catterwhaulin’ and wailing, about the time one gets done with the morning shave.
Next is what does one expect, when leaving the house in the morning. There is no one in my neighbourhood with whom I have any sort of romantic attachment. Yet, greeting each of my neighbours with a smile and politely, sincerely, answering their queries, is the foundation to a good, worthwhile day.
Among the inhabitants of this town, there are many attractive women. I’ve managed to become something of a friend to one of them, and am glad of her company and good graces. This leads me to the crux of the matter. Adult relationships, at any level, from social friendship to commitment, start with RESPECT: Respect for space, respect for time, respect for beliefs, respect for person. Aretha started that whole thing up, when I was in high school, but we haven’t, from the looks of things, come very far. The friend I mentioned above has a full plate. I have learned that being in her corner means NOT taking up the whole spot. I have my little square, and when she needs my help- HEEERE’s Gary ( without the insane Jack Nicholson leer, mind you). The rest of the time, we are operating on our own particular wavelength.
I make abundantly clear, to all of my friends, that I am here for them. I also have items on my Life List (Bucket List is so overused), in which I am glad to include them, but which I will otherwise do singly and alone, as needed. I respect their same mindset. I look forward to many years, with several of my friends along for the ride. Just let me know which station stops are your preferred boarding and departure points.