February 23, 2015, Prescott- When I was deep in mourning, and on the road, one of my closest friends reminded me that everything one does, regardless of circumstances, is the consequence of choice. I got a call, this morning, at 5:47, from one of the districts for which I work. I was not quite able to wrap my head around getting it together, and opted for a bit more sleep. On days like this, I am well aware of the consequence, both immediate and down the road. So have I learned to not blame others for much of anything.
Ann Landers once said, “No one can take advantage of you, without your permission”. How true, and how often disconcerting. One must have clear boundaries. The people we let into our lives are going to have expectations and are going to pursue agendas, which may or may not be in keeping with our own goals and plans. It is up to each of us, whether to play a particular game, or opt out.
Without making conscious choices, a life gets bogged down and the person living it, dependent, bitter and often self-harming. I have known many, besides myself, who defer decisions, based on excuses and the notion that “Conditions aren’t quite right”. Conditions will never be just so!
The other “tool” that the takers of this world employ, all too well, is guilt. I have learned to sleep very well at night, doing what I can for the dispossessed and others in need, without going so far as to put myself among their number, through reckless spending at the loud insistence of guilt-mongers.
There is simply no substitute for taking responsibility for one’s own actions and beliefs.