March 6, 2023- One of my fellow servers, in the Monday dinner line, asked why I was not putting shredded Parmesan cheese on a small snack of meatballs and sauce that I had taken for myself. I explained about the no dairy and limited grains that are part of my weight reduction plan.
He pointed to his belly, and said, “Not me. I paid for this and I own it!” The implication was: “Come on! Let it go and enjoy life!!” For years, maybe too many, I had the same attitude. I’m tired of it, though. Being of smaller girth actually appeals to me-for the sake of my heart health, if nothing else. So, I will continue the tight regimen, for as long as is necessary-probably another month or two. After that, maintenance will require a modified discipline.
Each of us gets to own our behaviours, as well as our statements. I have, thankfully, been called to account, at first by my parents and other adults, growing up; then by various people, in the years since. Mostly, though, I have been blessed with a very active conscience-which thankfully lets me rest, once I have made any amends that have been necessary, following transgressions great and small.
Taking ownership of life means being consistent, with a fair dose of flexibility-in the sense that plans can be made, while knowing that life can, and does, get in the way. The consistency lies in intent, in a sense of fairness and in communication. Taking ownership of life is also showing the force of example.
So, I enjoyed my snack of a few meatballs, in tomato sauce, cleaned the tables after serving and went back to the apartment, joining an online ecstatic dance group, for an hour or so. No one said an owned life had to be a burden.
Love it! I was shopping and saw a wonderful interaction. A young boy maybe 5 yrs old, had come up behind his mother and then zipped around her. As he was running he caught the edge of the cart and fell. He immediately blamed his mother for making him fall down. What was wonderful was that she very calmly stated to him that he cannot blame her for his actions. He protested and she didn’t argue but restated her previous comment! After a brief pout he apologized for blaming her for his tripping. When she asked him what he learned he offered, “I need to be more careful and not run inside.” He was hugged and praised for “taking ownership” of his choices!
LikeLiked by 1 person
My mother took very much the same tack, as we were growing up. Would that this had been the case with countless adults I have known, over the years, when they were growing up.