“We Don’t Do That, Here”

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November 19, 2024- It did not really surprise me, when a driver, headed south, blew through the red light. It did not surprise me, either, later this afternoon, when a self-absorbed young man pushed open the door to the gym and let it fly back. We who were behind him, saw it coming and just hung back a bit.

These were the gadflies, because we don’t customarily act in those manners towards our neighbours, around here. I rather doubt that most people, anywhere, behave in such a fashion, but here we are.

This is a town, though, where cowboys and hippies long ago made peace with each other. Arch-conservatives and progressives gather each Tuesday at noon, on opposite corners of Gurley and Cortez, each posting their respective messages. When it’s all over, the two groups mix together and socialize. A while back, when Red for Ed was a popular phrase used by liberal teachers, a rally was being held at Courthouse Square. A disgruntled reactionary, a lawyer of some repute, decided it’d be worth his while to drive by and yell cuss words at the mothers with children who were standing on the sidewalk. It was not the liberals who taught him right from wrong, but some supporters of then-President Trump who pulled him over. “We don’t do that here!” (He has not been visible at public events since that day.)

This is a town where support for clean air and water, for unadulterated, certified organic food, for natural supplements, is well-nigh universal. There are no questions asked of people who sport t-shirts or bumper stickers with provocative messages, because they don’t challenge those who promote the opposite messages. Live and let live, by and large, is what we do here.

This is, up to now, a town where unhoused people can get healthy meals and are less likely, for the time being, to be forced to sleep outside for lack of shelter. There are some who take issue with that, but for now, harassing the homeless is not something we do here.

This is, up to now, a town where the Master Plan specifically eschews discrimination based on race, national origin, gender, faith, political stance or sexual orientation. One city councilperson would like to see that changed, as that’s not how it is where she’s from. She is hearing, though, that discrimination is not something we do here.

We do civility here.

Misogyny

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November 17, 2024- I watched the first episode of “Lioness” this evening. It is a spy thriller, centered on women secret agents and fighters, in a Middle Eastern backdrop. Each of the women has a male advocate, if not a lover. They just don’t really need those men, day to day. One of the central characters comes to the Lioness program by way of escaping from a gang of disaffected, misogynistic men.

I thought back to how I was raised-to be a gentleman (by my father), countered by male peers who were alternately respectful of our mothers, sisters, grandmothers and aunts, while carrying a veneer of seeing other girls and women as means to an end. It was the stuff of adolescence, certainly, but subliminally was carried forward into our group psyches.

My wife became my equal, my partner, by dint of her sheer intellect and tough personality. Penny grew to become nobody’s fool. I became someone who did not need a fool. As the first true love of my maturity grew into a fully independent woman, so I began to grow into a fully independent man. From there, we both became interdependent.

In the years immediately following her passing, I found the sticky residue of my adolescence clinging to my psyche. As sheer will power and prayer had helped me shed alcohol dependency, thirty years earlier, so did they help me shed the stench of misogyny that was trying to get out. I let it out, along with the lack of self-esteem that is behind all such negative dust. True maturity had been reached.

Young men, around the world, face challenges to their self-concept that have historically been faced by posturing, adopting a dominant position towards their female peers and subscribing to a false sense of entitlement. This is the ethos of The Pack. There is an alpha male, but his “true strength” is only evident when the rest of the peer group is present, for reinforcement. The public face of misogyny is the Incel (“involuntary celibate”), who takes the stance that abstinence from sex is being forced on him by a conspiracy of women and other men.

In truth, though, focusing on one’s sexuality is dealing with only the outer trappings of insecurity. Procreation has an important place in the order of society, but it is only a place. A person, male or female, who has been raised to truly value self, who is focused on his/her totality: Intellect, variety of interests, physical stamina, dreams and goals, social skills, spirituality-will be more likely to know success, to be resilient in the face of challenges and less likely to blame others when things go wrong.

These are things I have come to fully realize, over the past fourteen years.

Pounded

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November 16, 2024- No doubt, the wind and water were practically freezing people in their tracks, as the monster called Man-yi, the sixth (or seventh) of its kind to hit the Philippines, in little over a month, wrought floodwaters, mud and collapsing buildings, from Samar, in the central region known as Visayas to Aurora, in northeast Luzon. People who I helped, after the earlier Typhoon Kristine, will not be able to tell me if that aid survived Man-yi (“Pepito”), for several days. They appear to be safe, in either government shelters or with family, elsewhere. Those in Metro Manila, including K, have full plates, I’m sure, keeping track of those close to them who live in Bicol, Catanduanes and Samar. Metro itself does not appear to have suffered.

Here at Home Base, the talk is more about who will serve in what position. What will they do, to cut the national debt? Whose jobs will they cut? Will there be attention paid to what the new “masters” regard as frivolous programs? Will they have frivolous programs of their own? In any adjustment of budgets and spending that involves large numbers of people, there needs to be attention paid to the households, and communities, that will be disrupted if there are mass layoffs and job cuts. This process can not be a frivolity in its own right. It can’t be managed by AI, by people acting like AI or by someone several degrees of separation from those impacted on the ground. (That last has been a sore point with those who, ironically, identify with the populist movement which seems to have prevailed, worldwide.) It stands to reason that meaningful work needs to be generated, at local and state levels, or in the private sector, before the proverbial swamp gets drained.

Nature, in this time of global change, can be brutal and unforgiving. It has consequences, both anticipated and unknown. Government, in this time of rearrangement and a degree of revanchism, does not have to be blinkered, in its pursuit of economy and justice for the small tax payer. Planning ahead and layering of cutbacks can prevent wholesale collapse of local economies from immediate mass cuts in government spending. It is not impossible for jobs to transferred to the private sector or to lower tiers of government, if enough advance planning is exercised.

We don’t need to leave one another feeling pounded. Nature does that well enough, on its own.

Beaver Moon

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November 14, 2024- The wind whipped the clouds around, but there was the moon, nearing full, at the time of year when beavers start storing food in their lodges, for winter sustenance. Thus, one day early, a group held an online meditation about the Beaver Moon. The meditation follows a similar pattern, month to month.

A treasure vase one that is buried in places of significance, around the world. Treasure vases have been interred in locales such as The Cloisters, in New York City; Livermore Laboratories in Berkeley; Masai Mara, outside Nairobi and Uluru, in the Outback of Australia’s Northern Territory. Over 100 such vases have been interred, and each is mentioned in the circle. Then a foot to crown meditation, involving deep breathing and focus, takes place among those assembled.

The time chosen for this month’s event was 10 a.m., PST. By then, I was finishing placing honorifics of another sort in the ground. Three bunches of silk flowers now help mark the grave of Michele Smith, a Baha’i friend of thirty-five years. After dropping off a few other gifts at her daughter’s house, I headed back towards Home Base, from Carson City.

The drive back was uneventful. The moon, though, kept watch on me-as evening gathered. I was the sole customer at Cosmic Diner, Amargosa Valley, NV, as a young lady served a fairly good fried chicken sandwich and raspberry ice tea, with the same sense of honour as if she were working a dining room at Bellagio. I like that about rural Nevadans. Where they are is plenty good enough.

I make one stop to top off gas going north, in Las Vegas and another stop going south. Most service stations have rest rooms. The Rebel Arco on west Craig Blvd does not. Plan ahead. It was okay, as there is a Jack in the Box next door. End of TMI.

At the end of Beaver Moon’s watch, I found it necessary to drive through the back streets of Ash Fork, which I had not previously done. The occasion was the closure of the exit ramp for U.S. 89 south. So, I found that there were many more houses in the little town than I had realized. Every locale has its wonders.

Beaver Moon will be full tomorrow night, so I will walk to the Raven Cafe after a Zoom devotional, bathing in its light. Life is good, whether here or abroad.

Headwinds

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November 13, 2024, Carson City- It was quite blustery, throughout the day, though the winds were temporarily lighter, as three of us prayed at Michele Smith’s grave site and placed a few items at the otherwise as yet unmarked resting place. ( I will place another item or two there, tomorrow morning, and the family will put a tombstone up, in due time.)

Afterwards, we went to one of their favourites, and mine: LA Bakery. While enjoying a great brunch, Red (the family members) and Purple (yours truly) shared what we appreciate about those on the right-hand side of the fence, while agreeing to disagree about what is to be appreciated about their opposite numbers. I can see excesses on both sides, but I also see that the differences between those two sides are exacerbated by the wire pullers, who are the only ones standing to gain from division. These are the latter-day Aeoluses, generating the headwinds that have come from focusing on the negative elements of both right and left.

Both lies being told about high-profile figures, and manufactured issues, are coming from dubious sources. The whole bathroom issue is best handled by the establishment of unisex rest rooms-themselves an outgrowth of the need for opposite sex caretakers of disabled adults to be able to take their loved ones and charges into a toilet, without annoying other men and women. (I was on the ground level on that issue, when needing to get my late wife in and out of rest rooms, in the 2000s.) The issue of biological males and, to a lesser extent, females competing on sports played by members of their transitioned sex could conceivably be handled by establishing leagues and conferences specifically for transgendered people. (No, it is NOT the same as the Negro Leagues of the first half of the Twentieth Century.) There are probably enough transgendered adults to make that doable.

The bar of social behaviour could stand to be raised. Profanity is a choice. It is not necessary, and certainly not enjoyable, to be subjected to cussing in music, on movies and cable television programs, almost on a continuous basis. Dumbing down of language reflects and exacerbates lowered expectations about thought and behaviour. Who benefits from such? Why, it is the wire-pulling class. These also are the prime beneficiaries of the class discrimination that so often is mirrored by racism and misogyny. Notice how deft the self-styled elites have been at tarnishing the reputations of genuinely heroic figures, and at pointing out to struggling lower and middle class figures just how awful the “other side” is.

The only real “them and us” are those who are honestly just trying to get a leg up in the world (both left and right,and everyone in between) versus those who want to keep the “great unwashed” in their places. This dichotomy is beginning to generate real headwinds. Expect them to gain in velocity and strength, the more the controllers try to keep the status quo.

A Sane and Intelligent Patriotism

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November 11,2024-

“Let there be no misgivings as to the animating purpose of the world-wide Law of Baha’u’llah. Far from aiming at the subversion of the existing foundations of society, it seeks to broaden its basis, to remold its institutions in a manner consonant with the needs of an ever-changing world. It can conflict with no legitimate allegiances, nor can it undermine essential loyalties. Its purpose is neither to stifle the flame of a sane and intelligent patriotism in men’s hearts, nor to abolish the system of national autonomy so essential if the evils of excessive centralization are to be avoided.”- Shoghi Effendi, The World Order of Baha’u’llah, pgs 41-42.

Relatively few people, deep down, are hateful towards their families. There are always disagreements and sometimes outright quarrels, but let an outsider attack a member of the brood, and the wagons will circle.

Go up the chain, towards community, state and nation-and the same process will play out. There are nations where the populace is restive, and outwardly disdainful of their government. Let someone from outside the group try and enter the fray, however, and there will be a united front.

Our feelings towards our families, communities, states/provinces/prefectures/oblasts, and our nations are each a reflection of how we see ourselves. An emotionally and physically healthy person has positive self-regard, love of family and healthy appreciation for, with a degree of loyalty towards, her/his surroundings. It is second nature for a human being to defend self; for parents to stand up for children, and vice versa; for siblings, and even cousins, to band together; for neighbours to support one another, in time of need; and for the citizens of a nation to defend their homeland.

In this day, it is also imperative for the human race to stand together, in the best interests of our species as a whole. This does not mean militarizing against a still-ephemeral race, or races, of extraterrestrials. It means coming together to devise solutions to threats against our collective existence. Some are the results of natural cycles and others are wrought by human activity. We are a vast multitude of imperfect beings. Every one of us has made mistakes, and many of those errors have had ill effects on others, besides ourselves. Collectively, by dint of excessive self-centered behaviour or just in the course of trying to live an ordered life, we have exacerbated, ramped up the effects of a natural increase in global temperatures-yes, that global warming. It would happen anyway, because it’s a natural cycle, but our actions, as a species, have made it worse.

So, what is a sane and intelligent patriotism? To me, it is simply a love for all the units to which one belongs, a willingness to band together with others, and to work, tirelessly, for the good of the homeland. Our homeland, in addition to our nation, is Planet Earth.

“The earth is but one country and mankind its citizens”-Baha’u’llah, Lawh-i-Maqsud (Tablet of Intention)

Charting Own Course

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November 9, 2024- Everyone deserves to chart their own course.

It turns out that the recent messages I received have little to do with me, at all. At some point in the not too distant future, the woman I love most in this world will be looking to find a position in a very sacred place. It is her long cherished dream to do this, so the last thing I ever want to do is be an impediment.

At this point in my life, the joy that would come from holding her or just being close to her is as nothing, when compared to the satisfaction of seeing my beloved K achieve this goal. Too often, even now, the dreams of one person, usually a woman, are subordinated to those of one, usually a man, who assumes a dominant role.

The thing I’d like to see more men, more people, embrace and foster the dreams of those they claim to love. Kathy will do so much good in any position she may take, at this most sublimely holy of spots, in service at a material level. Seeing her do this is dearer to my heart than any conventional relationship, as exhilarating as that would be. Seeing her reach any of her goals means the world to me.

My own course, at this point, will be determined largely by the needs of my little family and of this most cherished woman. I have lived a full and satisfying life, thus far, and accomplished many of my goals. Now, it is time to cheer on my loved ones, whether at their side or from afar.

Pause, and Reflect

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November 8, 2024- The ice in her words was palpable and almost debilitating. They seemed to have come out of nowhere, but the message was unmistakable. So I told her that her wishes will always be respected.

I have fallen deeply in love with only two women who were not responsible for my birth and upbringing. One gave me the best years of her life, and I gave back, to the best of my ability. It was hard to let her go, at the end, and for two years afterward, I even saw her in people I barely knew-leaving temporary wreckage in my wake. We all survived and recovered, and I thank dear Penny’s spirit for my survival.

I did not see the second one coming, but little more than a year ago, there she was. I had not gone to that place on the far side of the Pacific to find a wife, but I was smitten from the moment she walked in the room. A year’s worth of messages followed and I at least got to take her on a couple of daytime dates, on my last visit. I was prepared to move to that place, and relinquish all that I had gathered here-Home Base, vehicle and other possessions, and to bid farewell to so many friends. I only wanted to be with her, not out of fantasy or obsession, but out of a deep love.

I did not see the end coming, until the messages came this morning-First, a disembodied asexual voice: “It’s over”; then the words, discouraging me from continuing with my move and someone else’s message: “You’d only be in her way”. Family and friends here have warned me not to get too wrapped up in my feelings. They know that there are too many things that can go wrong-in a relationship that is hobbled by time, distance and cultural differences. I know that, too, and it takes some of the sting out of what happened this morning.

In the end, I had four different obligations-each relatively minor, but needing attention, nonetheless. So, I got myself together, went to Bellemont Baha’i School and checked the winterization process-completed; went to two different VA offices and called a third, regarding the discrepancy with one of my health care provider’s records; returned a call from one of the potential movers to the intended country and will get a quote from them next week, for good measure and took care of a bill that I had spaced out, last week. This evening, friends hugged me and said it was too bad. Music, at a small house party and at the Raven Cafe, helped to further lighten my mood.

It was a nice run, though, and it restored my self-confidence, even if it turned out too good to be true. I will love K forever, and life will go on.

Things That Need to Be Over and Stay Gone

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November 7, 2024- This is just a list, of those social constructs and practices that I think should be relegated to the scrap heap, and stay gone.

Slavery; sex trafficking; spouse beating; child beating (not mild spanking, beating); beating of animals; coerced sex; drug trafficking; less-than-living wages; intentional spewing of heavy motor vehicle exhaust; intentional littering and illegal dumping; nuisance litigation,especially by the wealthy against the poor; intentional poisoning of soil and water; individual possession of military-grade weapons and ordnance; denigration of any country, ethnic group or organized community; parentally-induced sexual transition of anyone under the age of 18; persecution of any bona fide community of faith in the Divine.

A few of these are bound to rankle some and irritate others. So be it. Some of these are bound to remain within the scope of individual choice. So be it. I just think that, all in all, we will have a much better world without these examples of inhumanity, or of people living through others.

Shining Through The Ages

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November 6, 2024- The road winds around, taking vehicle and walker alike down the hill, from the center of Jerome to Douglas Mansion, the home of Jerome State Park. In a center room on the first floor, the world of magnificent colour greets the viewer, from the safety of a locked case.

These glorious minerals, the product of high volcanic heat, come to us from a time when even the dinosaurs were still ages from appearing on Earth. The Cambrian, Ordovician and Silurian Eras were times of giant ferns, dragonflies the size of sparrows and scorpions the size of cats. These were collectively known as the Carboniferous Period, when heat and compression began to fuse minerals into gems, and transform plant and animal matter into petroleum.

I never get tired of any display of bright colours, and minerals are especially appealing, because of their longevity. That same longevity puts our perceived woes and concerns of this day and age into a very bright perspective.

In yesterday’s presidential election, a majority of voters freely chose to put the brakes on what they perceived as frenetic social change. They appeared to be opting for a “wagons in the circle” approach, the majority within this majority trying to at least buy some time, so that the changes that are buffeting the planet now may at least become manageable, comprehensible.

Real change, however, happens in stages, is often imperceptible and is definitely not easily counteracted. From the evolution of rocks and minerals into gems to the arc of human history, no impediment to change is very effective in the fullness of time.

I went to Jerome today, for the very reason of focusing on this feature of change, from the perspective of natural history. Minerals never disappoint. They shine outwardly to us, through the ages.