Category Archives: Personal goals

True Unity

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

July 14, 2023- As my dinner companions and I were standing at the register, preparing to pay for our respective meals, the man in front of us lost his equilibrium and fell, face down, on the floor. The wait staff, chef and the three of us focused on him, immediately, and between three of us, were able to get him up slowly and safely, onto a low chair. Chef called the emergency operator and EMTs were on site within five minutes. Our nonagenarian friend was still a bit woozy from the heat, and likely was dehydrated. Thankfully, he didn’t appear to have any broken bones, but only x-rays and a night’s observation at hospital will determine for sure. I will check with Rafter Eleven tomorrow, and get an update. Unity of action likely kept things from getting worse.

Earlier today, as I was preparing to go downtown and purchase gifts for the three children whose families I will see, during the upcoming journey to the Northwest and western Nevada, I noticed my landlord had a trunk filled with bags of cement. As my upper body strength is robust, so long as I also lift with my legs, I offered to help him get them into his wheelbarrow. Although we are the same age, he told me it would not be right, that I was too old and would get hurt. So, he wanted to do it all himself and would not let me so much as lift one bag. I have not seen him this evening and so alerted his family. That makes a second matter to update, tomorrow. Unity of action could have avoided whatever trouble he might have caused himself.

A father/daughter team presented this evening, via Zoom, on the subject of True Unity. It was defined as that unity of purpose and action that takes place despite differences of opinion and temperament. It was noted that various groups of like-minded people have gathered together, from time immemorial, only to fall apart or fade away, once differences of opinion led to estrangement. Countering this phenomenon takes unity of heart, as well as detachment from opinion and temperament.

My father taught that everyone deserves respect, inherently, regardless of outward opinions expressed. If they hurt others or committed mayhem, they deserved punishment, but that was for society, through the government, to exercise. We, as individuals, were never to take justice into our own hands. Baha’i teachings say the same thing. True Unity, then, leaves justice to the institutions set aside for that purpose, and focuses on building the moral and social foundations that will, in time, obviate the inclination towards criminal behaviour.

No one, in the Golden Age of mankind, will be left out.

Cosmetics, Patronization and Curbing My Tongue

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

July 11, 2023- Kia Sportage went into the shop this morning, to repair an unsightly set of scratches that were caused a while back, by my bugaboo-not being able to back up straight, for much more than six feet. It’ll be two or three days before the cosmetic fix is done. Speaking of cosmetics, I will purchase a scented oil from one friend, to give to another in a few days.

Gifting has never been an act of patronization, or done out of a sense of obligation. I am happy to offer a gift in acknowledging someone’s special day or personal achievement. My one blind spot, it seems, is giving to panhandlers. The louder and more forceful they are, the less they are absolutely going to get from me. A self-styled Buddhist monk is on the street, day and night, sometimes yelling at those of us who pass him by. Anything I would give him would only be encouraging this behaviour. The police, under Arizona law, cannot detain him unless he puts hands on people or blocks their way. So, he sits on a bench and yells about needing support for his “mission”. We are, in this day and age, quite sensitive about singling out the mentally ill, so I have quietly just moved along.

That brings up my own challenge, of talking out of turn or jumping into other people’s conversations-both features of my residual autism. Having had this happen, twice of late-last night and this morning, I know that there is still a bit of work to be done, at looking before I leap-conversation wise. At tonight’s meeting, I was able to just speak my peace and click the mute button. Zoom is a good way to correct conversational faux pas.

Thirty-Five Gratitudes

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

July 7, 2023- “When a thought of war comes, oppose it by a stronger thought of peace. A thought of hatred must be destroyed by a more powerful thought of love.” – ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, 1911. I have had competing impulses today, and the stronger message from my spirit guides is to focus on gratitude. I have a lot of angst and self-criticism going on today, but not much can be done to rectify the causes of all that-without pondering and listing all the reasons for being grateful.

Today, my son turned 35, and so I feel it useful to list thirty-five things, places and people for which/whom I am grateful.

35. Grand Canyon National Park-both North and South; . 34. San Diego; 33. Dietary protein shakes that have worked; 32. The core group of readers of this blog site; 31. Those who are committed to peace, through dialogue; 30. My large extended family; 29. Newfoundland; 28. My childhood home town- Saugus, MA; 27. My variegated playlist; 26. My book collection; 25. Planet Fitness; 24. The movement towards inclusion and equality; 23. Horses; 22. Historical sites-both domestic and worldwide; 21.Century Lounge and the Raven Cafe; 20. Cape Breton Island; 19. My comfortable Home Base (apartment); 18. Prescott Farmers Market; 16. Brittany (the region); 15. Santa Fe; 14. Butterflies; 13. The ocean; 12. Whales and dolphins; 11. Reusable bags; 10. Mountains; 9. Sunrises and sunsets; 8. Colorado; 7. Arizona as a whole; 6. My closest friends; 5. Children and teenagers; 4. My siblings; 3. My parents; 2. My little family; 1. Spirit guides (and the Baha’i teachings).

This list is not written in order of importance, though the top five are certainly on my mind and in my heart 24/7.

The Vehicle

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Education, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 29, 2023- In the debate that has ensued today, following a decision by the U.S. Supreme Court to end quota admissions to universities, there have emerged two heartfelt themes-both looking for the same result: Education, leading to success in life.

One response is that it is too soon for such an end. There is a sense that a backlash is building against people who are disadvantaged, that those who have built their own fortunes are tired of sharing and that it looks as if the fortunate want to cut off the flow of opportunity.

The other says that people no longer need to have their hands held by legislative fiat or executive action. This group is not all that enamoured of a system that excludes people, either. They see through a different lens, that of disciplined self-reliance and resilience.

There is, as is often the case, merit to both views. I listened to a man explain that he sees America through the windshield of the vehicle, that he wants to see people ahead and not be stuck in the past. I listened to someone else say that the barriers to progress are still in the road, and have to be removed, before the vehicle can go forward in a meaningful way.

A successful driver tends to all aspects of the journey. The vehicle is maintained and kept roadworthy. The driver keeps self rested and stays attentive to all around, minding the traffic signals and signs, and driving at a speed that is safe for the conditions of traffic and the road itself. The driver does not impose own will on others, nor act as if others have no business being on the road.

THIS is where those who call for a complete end to quotas, in the matter of higher education, need to check the rear view mirror-and the side views. There are, in fact, those who want to push the vehicle into reverse and there are those who creep up into the vehicle’s blind spot, and sneak past on the inside-because that is legal. Some of them pose as advocates of self-reliance. They are anything but.

Taking unfair advantage of others-whether they seek a college/university education, or want to pursue a career in the trades, should be opposed by all leaders of good will. The wise driver delivers passengers safely to their destination and helps fellow travelers achieve their goals as well.

Moving Around, While Standing Still

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, Historical, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

June 27, 2023- Were I to meet him in the Next World, Fernando Pessoa would probably greet me with,”So, you amassed all those photographs and essays about so many places, near and far-and left them for someone else to handle. SHAME!!” The Portuguese philosopher/poet was famously averse to travel and regarded those who did peregrinate as being incapable of focus.

Yet, his body of work, a mirror into the Portuguese mind, is one of the magnets that attract me to that front door to the Mediterranean, though I am unlikely to get there until 2027. Indeed, there always seems to be an historical, or contemporary public, figure enticing a journey to any given place, as well as friends more intimate.

I have, for the past week or so, been engaged in numerous journeys of the mind, and of friendship, in this most salubrious of home bases. Sitting at my laptop desk, and learning the views of the greats in literature and philosophy, offsets much of the detritus that might otherwise fill the mind of someone my age. Visiting those, around town or in the town just down the road, who are shut in or who need to consult about a problem that seems to them overwhelming, is as breathtaking as a visit to the Grand Canyon, Big Sur or the French Region of Bretagne.

I am, essentially, feeling blessed to be able to join a crew feeding the homeless residents of our community, each Monday evening; to be able to help young friends put away equipment at the Farmers Market, each Saturday afternoon; to feed my friend’s cats, while she is away and to share environmentally and dermatologically sound laundry sheets with someone whose health is delicate.

I look forward to an encounter with Senhor Pessoa. In the hopefully long meantime, the essays, journals and photographs will continue to find themselves amassed. The when of anything I do and where I go will continue to be determined by my unseen guides. As the prophets tell us, in Ecclesiastes, “there is a time for every purpose under Heaven”.

“What Would They Want For You Now?”

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 23, 2023- A group of about two dozen young men walked into a Los Angeles session that offered poetry and meditation, to address social dysfunction. One by one, the men spoke to the three “experts”, saying that all this philosophy was good on its face, but that the reality they faced each day was far more ominous- 9 mm weapons pointed at them, suspicious police tailing and stopping them, food deserts, joblessness, and so on. Besides, the men said, they knew too many of their peers who had been slain on the streets, in the past year.

The experts wisely acknowledged that there were too many souls who hadn’t been honoured, so they asked each of the men to go outside and gather up a stone, for each person they knew, who had been killed in the last year. After several minutes, the men came back inside, each carrying many rocks. They sat down, a candle was lit and placed in the center of the circle, and each person was asked to give a name to each of the stones. He was then to say the name of the victim, and place the stone next to the candle. This continued, until all the stones were set around the candle, honouring each of the murder victims.

Jack Kornfield, a social psychologist, and author of “A Path With Heart”, which helped me so much, in the early stages of grief, in 2011, was one of the “experts”. He posed a question to the men: “What would they want for you now?” One by one, the members addressed that question, in a pensive and serious manner.

As I listened to this presentation, I thought of Dad, Penny, Brian, my in-laws, grandparents, aunts and uncles, even the most rambunctious of my cousins. I think they would want me to know peace, to have arrived at self-acceptance and to keep on in the path of service. Each of them sacrificed, in one way or another, that the world they left behind might be a better place. Friends, like John H., Deedee B., Donna G., Sean W., Mario M., even Frankie Q., would want me to be doubly sure that the person inside this frame was jettisoning the baggage that held me back, for so long.

I have to want the same for myself-and believe me, it is happening-slowly, but steadily.

Solstice Notes

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 21, 2023- The woman I briefly encountered, yesterday, insisted that solstice was another form of equinox-and that there were four days per year, in which the amount of light was equal to that of darkness. Unable to convince her otherwise, I went about my other business. I hope she figures it out by December.

For the rest of us, Solstice was a day of fair celebration. Atop Solstice Mesa, many were gathered, with three barbecue parties going on, when I reached the top carrying my drum. I quietly tapped on old Bear, while gazing at the sunset.

Of course, the conversation among the group members was about the bear which mauled and killed a man, south of town, last Friday. I had met the gentleman once,about two years ago, whilst helping his neighbours, who have since moved into town. This was not the case of a rabid animal, and it appeared to have been otherwise healthy-just somehow deranged. Witnesses say the man was minding his own business and the bear caught him from behind.

Another conversation took place earlier, on the topic of intentional communities. These have been cropping up, all over the country, somewhat in reaction to the proliferation of housing units owned by Private Equity firms, which have no compunction about pricing housing out of reach of a good many people-singles and families alike. Intentional communities exist in Arizona. I know one small IC, whose residents were once friends of mine, but have seemingly closed themselves off from many of us. There are larger ICs, with one of the most famous being in the far northeast corner of Washington State. They have some similarity to the communes of the ’60s and ’70s, but there is a structure and purpose to their operation, thus the “Intentional” part of the name. See http://www.ic.org.

My chiropractor has found that spine and musculature are in vastly improved condition. He credits my activity-and the lost weight. I know how to maintain both now, so the check-ups will be every six weeks, rather than monthly. A set of medical lab tests, tomorrow, will hopefully offer further affirmation.

We now all await the monsoon season-with the forecast calling for two more weeks of dry heat, followed by a build-up of humidity and moisture, starting July 5. That is quite standard. I will be around, at any rate.

What Spring Sprung

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 20, 2023- I had lunch with a good friend, in a restaurant run by another good friend. This was the high point of a day that was intentionally low key. I needed to regroup, after the intensity of the camps and yesterday’s clean-up, and spending an hour or so with Akuura was a good way to relax. It’s been a while, due to my being busy with camp, so we covered a lot of ground. Emileigh, as always, was solicitous, while being low key-just a delightful young lady.

That brings me to the whole matter of “friend” vs. “acquaintance”. In tonight’s Zoom call, a session of the ongoing “Copper 2 Gold” series on Race Unity, a few people made a strong case for being discerning, in using the term “friend”. I have a different take. I consider people friends, even if we barely know one another, if I sense that they have my best interests at heart, and are kind, overall, to other people as well. “Acquaintance” is a term with which I have a hard time, mainly because people I trusted, in the past, have referred to me as such, in a standoffish and negative way. Having felt like an outsider, too often in the past, I use the term in my own speech to refer to those I meet once or twice, like a clerk in a store that I don’t frequent.

Spring has come to an end, and with it, the academic year of 2022-23; the Bellemont camp season; my tenure as Study Circle Coordinator, in Prescott Cluster (area)- a Baha’i volunteer position, which rotates every five or six years; and the intense phase of my weight reduction program (202-38= 164). What Spring sprung was a keener sense of self-worth and a better ability to help others, without putting myself behind the Eight Ball.

Now comes summer-much of it to be spent here at Home Base, or within a day’s drive. It’ll be refreshing to be around for the Fourth of July and another friend’s milestone birthday. Of course, a drive up north will take up two weeks in the latter part of July and the end of summer will find me back east, for Mom’s latest milestone. In between, barring Red Cross emergencies, I will be here in the place that the gracious Divine has set aside for my well-being.

Heave-Ho

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 19, 2023- The bags went into the landscaper’s trailer quite fast, and two at a time. Two of us managed to clear one pile and add 1/4 of the other, some it dry yard waste and some rather wet refuse from the kitchen. We got to the landfill in about thirty minutes, at which point the driver went through a learning curve about Landfill Etiquette. His documents were accepted, but it took just a little explanation of the protocol for dumping and re-weighing an empty vehicle. We then drove out to the dump site and reversed the process-emptying the trailer. The same process played out, one more time, rinse and repeat. It was a bit warmer, and the bags heavier, but we managed quite well.
Two men, working with a purpose, got a task, which many said needed four pairs of hands, done in two hours, driving 22 miles each way.

Others, in several other places, chose to act out-using what is becoming the default method of solving problems, in too many instances. In Willowbrook, IL; George, WA; Lewistown, PA; St. Louis; Carson, CA; Baltimore; Kellogg, ID; Philadelphia; San Francisco and Milwaukee, people were slain-“for reasons unknown”. It could have been a domestic disturbance, or someone who had a bad childhood lashing out at others celebrating Father’s Day, or someone angry at the Juneteenth holiday. It could have just been someone deciding to kill for the thrill.

We did our share of heave-ho, this morning. It’s time for another sort of heave-ho: Stop making excuses for people who use guns to solve their problems. I know a good many who own guns, and use them properly; some are lifelong friends and some are family members. They would not think of taking their frustrations out on the lives of others. They would not make their weapons available to misfits or to the immature. It is time to demand an end to giving firearms to the mentally ill, in the name of the Second Amendment. It soils the dignity of that document and tarnishes the very term “American”. It is time to stop putting profits-or ideology, before human lives, in both this specific area and in a broader sense.

The bigger the problem, the more collective effort is needed. We know this, and yet…..

Camp Three, Day Four: An Outpouring of Gratitude

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 16, 2023, Bellemont- Chef said it is the first time she has ever received a written statement of thanks from campers. I also got one-which complements a similar statement from those sheltered at Watsonville, earlier this Spring. These reflect the love we felt, and as Paul McCartney once sang, in an entirely different context-” And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”

The women and girls awoke early; the boys and men were a bit more casual in doing so. Once things got rolling, though, everyone had their bags and items on the ramada- and the buildings were spotless by 10:30. A lot of food was left over, so those of us who will tend to a mountain of bagged refuse, next Monday, will be in good stead. So, too, will the people to whom I help serve food on Monday evening and the chef’s ravens-(they remember a generous human, and will accept food that people can’t).

It is one of the nicest series of activities in which I have ever taken part. This year is shaping up to be one of those in which my true nature is coming forward-and being openly appreciated helps in that regard. Long may this continue, even if there are occasional setbacks and tribulations.