First Camp, Day Three: A Spoonful of Sugar

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June 4, 2023, Bellemont- Mom says there are two ways to “draw flies”-honey and vinegar. The first draws more, of course. I will pass on drawing flies, but relating to teenagers is all about figurative honey: Understanding their minds and hearts, paying attention to their words as well as their actions, without butting into their conversations.

A young woman made a reference to someone as “respectfully creepy”. Since I was within earshot and line of sight, and my behaviour has not been “creepy”, and as she is a well-mannered person, I doubt that was a reference to yours truly. It is more likely with regard to one of her peers who is showing unwanted attention. Nonetheless, one must always be mindful of how attention to others is interpreted.

The chef decided, after a low key day that was concerned with study groups and an impromptu volleyball tourney-and little for me to do around campus, that a baked treat was in order. She served up a pan chocolate and butterscotch chip cookie- a bit soft and gooey, but definitely a hit with the campers-and several adult staff. I was the one serving, and for making sure that stragglers and loners got their share, was able to bond with more of the campers.

Millennials came up with the term “I appreciate you”, in expressing gratitude for kindnesses great and small. The succeeding two generations of youth have continued this nice practice, and we oldsters likewise have taken it into our own lexicon.

I draw a lot of strength from being with groups like this one. Camp is rejuvenating!

The Return of October

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October 8, 2022- The Hunter’s Moon shines tonight, full in its pronouncement of the northern Autumn and the southern Spring. The northern hunter would traditionally seek out the fattest of prey, for his family’s sustenance through the winter. The southern hunter would discern the robust male of the sought-after prey, sparing the female who would be with offspring.

The past several tenth months of the year have been hot, and better characterized as AUG-tober. Not so, this year. I feel a genuine crispness in the air, and even when the dry weather returns, around the middle of this month, the temperatures are not forecast to rise to an unseasonable level. This may be a respite, a boon from the Divine, given the harshness that has hit so many, this year of feminine energy coupled with an almost inhuman push back, from the traditional sources of authority.

Those of us who genuinely act from a place of truth and love are learning more ways in which to apply that truth and love, in anomalous settings. These include the times when someone just does not want to be bothered with us. Do they not also deserve the dignity of space? They include the times when people want the chance to make their own mistakes. Do they not deserve our loving admonitions, and efforts to protect those innocent of wrongdoing, form being harmed by the mistakes of the recalcitrant?

The little boy wandered into a group of high schoolers, who were waiting to place their orders in the crowded entryway of the sandwich shop. He was looking for his mother, calling out for her, and throwing up his hands in forlorn frustration. As he neared the exit to the outside, a group of girls kept the door closed, and one of their counselors followed the child, not letting him out of her sight, until the mother was located.

Problems arise, and are best solved by the energy emanating from love and light.

What Mom Said

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May 10, 2020-

My mother is the last person to want gratuitous or “obligatory” sentiments, on her important days.  Either MEAN it, or leave it unsaid.  Our gathering, this morning, brought the majority of extended family to their screens and a delighted matriarch was honoured by each.

I recall the things she said, along the way, that have impacted how I face life, even to this day.

“Look beyond the length of your nose”.  This appeal to carefully investigate truth and to not be impulsive, in seeking to find answers, has paid countless dividends.

“Strong arm stuff never wins any victories”.  So true, the use of force does not breed the sort of loyalty that brings the rewards one truly wants.

“A man was once killed by ‘I thought’ “.  Acting upon assumptions can often be woefully counterproductive.

“Staring at the tree won’t get you any fruit.”- Getting up and acting upon one’s desires is the only real way to achieve anything.

“Have adventure in your soul”- She told me this, with regard to being bold enough to get out of my shell and approach girls, for friendship, in my teenage years.  I have taken it  more broadly, in my maturity, in looking far afield at what I can do in life.

“A male is not a man until he’s forty.’- She saw that men need a broad variety of both successful and adverse life experiences, before becoming truly mature.

“Drinking gives false courage”- Isn’t that ever the truth!

There were many other admonitions that my mother has offered, in her ninety-one years and eight months on this Earth.  I look forward to hearing at least a few more.

Cherish the Lessons

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September 26, 2017, Prescott-

All my life,

I have practiced honesty,

as my place on the spectrum,

has never let me

sweep anything under the carpet.

So, I  have let things out

about what I’ve done,

and taken my lumps

or, as has been the case lately,

taken the lessons

behind the admonitions.

If we view correction

as savaging,

then debilitation results.

If it is seen as pushing

one upwards,

then strength happens.

So, today’s meeting,

with lovingly issued

advisement,

accompanied by solid

background information,

was a textbook example,

of how any issue

can be resolved.

It all comes down to will,

or the lack thereof.

On The Ground

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January 2, 2017, Chula Vista-  “Make a friend today.  Be the first to smile, in a friendly way.”- These words, to a Bluegrass song, coming from my son’s housemate’s i-pod, say all that needs to be said, in the first step to healthy survival.

Son is understandably anxious, about the coming change in his life, which is why I’m here, this week, and will be available for him, between now and departure day.  It makes it easier,for both of us, that he will be in Arizona for most of that time.  Once he gets to Korea, there will plenty of other seasoned adults to guide him into the routine.

I went on a routine errand, to pick up some items at the local Ralph’s (SoCal’s version of Fry’s and Kroger’s), yesterday afternoon.  While backing out of my space, synchronicity almost led to crash, as a large SUV was also backing out, across from me and the guy who was waiting for my space was inching forward.  Each of us noticed the others, at the last split second, and no fender benders hailed in the New.  Such is life, in Bubble Land. I’m grateful to everyone, when I was growing up, who kept after me to get out of my head and pay attention. Now, I just have to keep their admonitions in mind, in all circumstances.

Today is statutory New Year’s Day, which means that, while the majority of us carry on with our lives, the government and the banks stay shuttered, more or less.  It could be more severe, though.  In Japan, New Year lasts for five days.  Then again, even here, if Congress and the Executive don’t get their act together, soon, it’ll be another series of rounds of “Who’s open for business?”, come April.

The rains were kind to SoCal, and to nearby eastern neighbours, this past weekend.  I sense we all may get a few more soakings, the rest of this winter.  It’ll be a relative drop in the bucket, but perhaps will be the start of a reasonable trend.

Reasonable trends are what we need, across the nation, and the planet.  I look forward to each such movement, however small. Have a great month, moving forward, everyone.  I will be here, as many days as possible.  Oh, and make a friend today!