Tag Archives: life lessons

What Mom Said

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Posted by on in Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Striving

May 10, 2020-

My mother is the last person to want gratuitous or “obligatory” sentiments, on her important days.  Either MEAN it, or leave it unsaid.  Our gathering, this morning, brought the majority of extended family to their screens and a delighted matriarch was honoured by each.

I recall the things she said, along the way, that have impacted how I face life, even to this day.

“Look beyond the length of your nose”.  This appeal to carefully investigate truth and to not be impulsive, in seeking to find answers, has paid countless dividends.

“Strong arm stuff never wins any victories”.  So true, the use of force does not breed the sort of loyalty that brings the rewards one truly wants.

“A man was once killed by ‘I thought’ “.  Acting upon assumptions can often be woefully counterproductive.

“Staring at the tree won’t get you any fruit.”- Getting up and acting upon one’s desires is the only real way to achieve anything.

“Have adventure in your soul”- She told me this, with regard to being bold enough to get out of my shell and approach girls, for friendship, in my teenage years.  I have taken it  more broadly, in my maturity, in looking far afield at what I can do in life.

“A male is not a man until he’s forty.’- She saw that men need a broad variety of both successful and adverse life experiences, before becoming truly mature.

“Drinking gives false courage”- Isn’t that ever the truth!

There were many other admonitions that my mother has offered, in her ninety-one years and eight months on this Earth.  I look forward to hearing at least a few more.

Fatherhood

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Posted by on in children, Family, Personal Values, Spiritual, Striving

June 18, 2017, Prescott-

The little girl told her father that she wanted to go over to an open area, at the memorial service for one of her school mates, so that she might do flips and somersaults.  “Go ahead”, said the man, while casting a wary eye about the grounds, “I’m watching you.”

This is among the fastest moving years I can remember.  Even staying closer to Home Base, for much of June, there has been no end to full days of activity, geared towards the betterment of the world.  That’s what we are expected to do, though- leave the world a better place than we found it.

I believe I have made a step in that direction, by raising a human being to adulthood, and pointing him in the direction that seemed most sensible to me- and most importantly, to him.  He has not disappointed me, once, since taking the vow of service to his country, and moving forward as an intelligent, hard-working young man.

My Dad saw me through some tough times, never giving up.  I miss him, yet I’m glad he didn’t have to see the difficulties through which we lived, in the first ten years of this century.  On the other hand, I will do all I can to support Aram, if trials and turbulence come again his way.

As to those hard ten years, 2001-11, commitment as a father means commitment as a husband.  I stayed true to Penny and did everything possible, to make sure she was in charge of her own life, to the end, no matter what pressures were brought on us by “experts” and well-meaning people, who just wanted to “get ‘er done”.  We honed our consultation skills, which were more something I, more than she, had to develop. It’s academic, as to whether we would have been better-served by using a debt reduction service, rather than filing for bankruptcy, but we chose the latter, and it’s all in the past, now.  Good life lessons were learned, late, and not lost on our son.

I see the vast majority of fathers, at least those with whom I have some contact, being wonderful, dedicated men.  None of us walks on water, yet we are producing fairly well-grounded young people.  Some are intensely vigilant; others, like the man mentioned above, are cautious, but relaxed enough to let their sons and daughters step out on their own, according to ability.

Fatherhood, even when children mature, and seem a million miles away, is an eternal blessing.  I look forward to many more years of that blessing and, if God wills, to its logical outgrowth:  Grandfatherhood.