Tag Archives: self-discipline

The Road to Diamond, Day 142: The Long of It

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 19, 2025- Today was the 250th anniversary of the beginning of the Battles of Lexington and Concord, which are seen by many as the beginning of the American War for Independence from Great Britain. It is also the twelfth anniversary of the Boston Marathon bombing, by which two men and a woman tried to make the claim that the American Experience was ignoring the plight of Muslims in Western and Central Asia, and thus Americans deserved to suffer.

A conservative friend recently pointed out that the basic conflict in our society is between those who believe good actions should be the result of free choice and those who believe that good actions often have to be coerced. I believe that most people start out the socializing portion of their lives (around age 4) wanting to please the people who are most closely in their view (parents, siblings, grandparents and, if they are lucky, extended family like aunts, uncles and cousins). Friends begin to be made around that time, as well. If that love is not reciprocated, for whatever reason, the person will devise other means of obtaining goals. Thus, greed, aggression and devious behaviour (such as lying or fantasizing) take root.

So, until such time as the spiritualization of the entirety of the human race is realized, we need some governmental safeguards, to serve as prompts, in moments of feckless, antisocial or exclusionary activity. We needed government to put a stop to slavery, then to two-tiered education systems and institutionalized racism, then to the same discriminatory practices regarding the treatment of women-and by extension, homosexuals. We needed government to protect workers from the excessive greed of employers. To some extent, we still need these laws, to guard against backsliding.

Freedom is never going to be free, so if we as a species want to be able to function without coercion, there is only one long term answer, the development and maintenance of self-discipline. My life has only become freer since I made a disciplined lifestyle my reality. I am quite certain that the same is true of anyone else who truly feels personal freedom.

The Road to Diamond, Day 128: Walls and Wire

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 5, 2025- “Making bridges out of walls that keep us apart”-line from a 1970s Baha’i song.

A few things became clearer today, after two videos were shown of the situation at the border between the United States and Mexico. First, as I had suspected after my own visits to border communities, over the past thirty-seven years, the communities on either side of the frontier are tightly-knit, one to the other. This is not just true of First Nations communities, like the Tohono O’odham and Quechans. The two cities that are both called Nogales-one in Arizona, the other in Sonora-are no more easily divided than, say, the Kansas Cities, or the Niagara Falls. Borders,necessary as they are to our own contrived sense of social order, are essentially artificial. We need national borders, for our concept of organization to make sense-the same way we need family dwellings and property; towns and cities; counties, states, provinces, prefectures and oblasts.

The second instance of clarity is the futility of maintaining border as illusion. An octogenarian woman from southern Arizona walked segments of the border, in her video, and showed even a few militia members that there are both gaps in the iron wall and places where cartel members have dug underneath the bollocks and spires. The government can police entry and exit from this country to a certain extent, but no less a conservative voice than Phil Boas, of The Arizona Republic, has noted that the Mexican cartels have a presence in all 50 states, all parts of the Americas and the four other inhabited continents, as well.

There are two features of human life that are primarily feeding the strength of the cartels: The natural mobility of the human race and the perceived need of many for an external substance that can provide a sense of personal security/self-worth. It was pointed out that both of these factors have been turned into revenue sources, by the international criminal element-aided and abetted by certain of the international financial and political elite. Personal safety has been shaken, in many villages of Latin America and Africa, by the very same gangs who then offer transport to the United States or western Europe-at a premium. Substances, both natural and man-made, are trafficked by the same entities. All of these activities are promulgated at the point of a gun, or even more serious weapons, like armed drones and artillery.

Walls and wire are offered by the flip side of the same coin that is represented by the cartels. The one engages in disorder; then, the other comes in and offers to solve the problem, through a heavy hand. It’s a timeless story, and yet, we have failed, as a species, to put two and two together.

The solution is perhaps long to yet come, but it entails self-awareness; self-love and self-discipline. Only when the communities of the world are comprised primarily of emotionally and spiritually mature people, can we hope to cast off the twin controlling agents of autocracy. I am seeing glimmerings of hope, in that regard, with open resistance to overbearing governments, in countries across the globe (South Korea, Bangladesh, the Philippines, Poland, Syria and Brazil being recent examples) and more nascent, but still lively, resistance to the cartels, in certain communities of both the Americas and the “Old World”. We saw evidence of both, today, in all 50 states, every U.S. territory and in several other countries with large American diaspora.

Rising past autocracy takes personal discipline, and that takes self-love.

The Road to Diamond, Day 13: Getting Past “Go”

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 11, 2024- Some days, it is just hard to get out of bed. Negative energy can take hold, and simple tasks can seem like they are just in the way. On days like this, though, sleeping in is not an option.

I had my every-four-months dental checkup, which meant a drive to Phoenix. So, up it was, at 6:30 and out the door by 8. Negative energy presented itself, as I went to pay for my breakfast sandwich and coffee, at an automated register that alternately wouldn’t scan my items, then scanned the coffee twice. After human intelligence solved that problem and I got cash back, for the duplicate coffee, everything else fell into place, until I got to the on-ramp for AZ 101. After a five-minute crawl (this was after rush hour, mind you), the rest was easy and I got into the dentist’s office with five minutes to spare.

The exam itself was positive and I was again congratulated for keeping on top of oral hygiene. I had once again pushed past “Go” and collected $200.

Considering all that this life has brought, both good and not-so-good, I have been lucky to have had as many “Collect $200” days as I have. The cost is developing self-discipline, and while it came late to me, the benefits have piled up nicely. Getting out of bed in the morning, and in a timely manner, has paid the bills, taken me on some fabulous adventures and brought fascinating people into this life. Staying put, under the covers, would only guarantee aloneness, a fantasy life and ennui.

I will stick with getting past “Go”.

Coming Together

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, distraction issues, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

July 28, 2024, Carson City- Little Man wanted to learn the simple game, which other members of the family were playing. So, he was given a seat at the table and the process was explained very simply. He’s a bright child, so it didn’t take long, and he was fully participating in the game-actually doing quite well at it. Allowances were made for his attention span, so he came and went-taking care of other things that had his interest.

His older sister was involved in the game, and played more consistently. A household chore took her away from the table, and that was more than okay. Peace in any house depends upon respect, across the board. When it later came time for her to spend quality time with her father, as well, that took priority.

There was a calm and very civil air in the house today. I sense it has much to do with the departure of some rather troubled and uncivil neighbours. Toxicity can spread, almost unannounced, insidiously. It was the first time, in quite a while, that the head of the household felt comfortable working in his own back yard, and the relief was palpable. These are good people, who have much love to give to their children and to extended family.

We are each individuals and will always have a sense of separation from even those closest to us. At the same time, we need one another, and pretending otherwise just leads to an unnatural divide. Coming together requires respect, in both directions. Miscreants can be brought into the fold, but on the terms of those who are practicing virtuous behaviour, not the other way around. There is a story that an early Baha’i told, of a saintly man and a ruffian. The saintly one told the ne’er do well that he could help him turn into a respected member of society, “in a month’s time”. The thug replied, ” I can corrupt you, in less than a day.” Both were right, underscoring the need for virtues to be instilled in children, and modeled in a consistent manner, by all significant adult role models in their view. Fortitude and self-discipline are needed, in withstanding the temptations thrown out by such as the miscreant in the story.

I am relieved that the two children, who I love very much, will no longer have to endure the nefariousness next door-and that everyone will be able to show the love for one another that has never been far below the surface, even in times of tension. This has been a wondrous cap to a very fruitful journey. Tomorrow, I head back to Home Base I.

The Lamb’s Turn

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Hiking and Nature, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

March 31, 2021- A common saying is that March comes in like a lion and goes out like a lamb. I have seen years in which this month now ending has been as leonine at the end as it was at the beginning, and indeed it looks like Easter weekend will be of that ilk, in the Northeast.

Here in the American Southwest, though, it appears as though we are in for warmer weather, with only the slightest chance of rain, through April and probably May, as well. So, with the gentleness, I find I have somewhat more energy. I am at the age where it takes more effort to start the day facing cold and dark and the fullness of Spring is ever welcome.

I also know, however, that cold and dark will always be with us-and that extreme heat is far from a bargain, also. The lamb can grow into a snorting, cantankerous ram, in short order. Life is ever a process of falling down, getting up again, confronting oneself and delving deeper into what is needed, in order to grow more confident. The lessons offered by every infant who goes forth into toddlerhood, without any of the self-pity that often comes later, come to mind. A baby keeps at the work of turning over, lifting self up, scooting along and finally, walking without falling.

It is an achievement, as well, for anyone who casts aside self-pity, who rises above both depression and narcissism by doing the hard work of emotional turning over, psychological self-lifting, moving along with some support and, finally, moving through life without stumbling and falling. It takes lots of courage and true self-confidence, but at some point, it is more than doable.

Striding into April, I see a clear schedule of special assignments in schools, the Baha’i Festival of Ridvan, lots of hiking and maintaining my vigilance against the pandemic (this last, through May-and June, as needed.). I have made small changes (new pillows for my bed, additional exercises and dietary adjustments to bring my abdomen into compliance with my own health regimen) and commit to deeper exploration of this amazing world.

The Summer of the Rising Tides, Day 59: The Ties that Bind

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

July 29, 2020-

It is easier to mend connections with people through acts of integrity, than by insisting on that which injures their feelings and ignores their perceptions. So it has come to my banishing memes and shared posts, which have only served to confuse some of my online friends, while not exactly elucidating my own views.

A personal blog, or social media page, can’t really serve as a marketplace for ideas. That role is for the comments section, which is hopefully governed by rules of civil discourse. I have set such rules for my other social media site, and, only on two instances have I had to delete toxic comments which got past the Akismet filters on this site.

My focus is, more than ever, on fostering the ties that bind us. One commenter on my other site recommended that we all view differences as diversity, rather than as divisions. Seeing nuggets of commonality takes a great deal of self-discipline and patience, not often evident in times of widespread confusion, such as these. Yet, it remains that this sort of vision is the only way we can, as a species, get out of this confusion.

Our strands of Dioxyribonucleic Acid are the most basic tools we have, for keeping us tied. Let us look to those DNA features that are common, that lead to our shared esperiences and visions.

A Few Rules for Self

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Posted by on in distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal goals, Personal Values, Striving

November 25, 2019- 

I made it an enjoyable day, by setting a few rules for myself, a few days in advance of turning sixty-nine.  The more one takes care of self, the less likely it is that others can slip into the vacuum and divert attention from what matters.

I found myself trying to help another person,  yesterday afternoon, and only ended up feeling like I was about to tear out what’s left of my hair.  That’s not a direction in which I plan on heading again.

The first rule I have set for myself, therefore, is to limit my time on any one online discourse to twenty minutes, per day, maximum. I will make exceptions for my immediate family.  Time is far better spent, at least in my view, by doing things like walking, tending to my home, cooking and reading.

The second rule is to read at least an hour each day. I got away from that practice, a few years back and found it most rewarding to return to the printed page today.

The third rule is to not procrastinate about doing a task, just because it is novel to me.  Specifically, I have a new water system, involving a complicated piece of equipment.  Fortunately, there is a DVD that is likely to guide me through the process, certainly more than the confusing paper diagram.  I am one of those who doesn’t easily comprehend the tie between a piece of equipment and a wordless diagram.  It’ll get done, though.

It’s been a fine day, though.  I received my new driver’s license, good for another five years, and a document needed by a family member also arrived.  Thanksgiving plans appear set, and the last few days of being 68 look to be spent in fine weather, albeit rather windy weather.

Not A Day For Hate

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Posted by on in Community, distraction issues, impediments, Personal Values, Social, Striving

August 8, 2019-

A few days ago, in the wake of last weekend’s shootings, a  minor pundit posed the idea that the eighth day of August was being anticipated, by alt-right adherents, as a day to call attention to their views, it being 8/8, or “Double H”-the extended premise, in turn, being “Heil Hitler”.  I find that premise ludicrous, but worthy of being countered.

Thus far today, there has been a report of the stabbing of four people, in Santa Ana and an apparent gas leak-explosion in Tampa, neither of which is being in any way tied to right wing extremists.  Political radicals, with mad agendas are, however, an ongoing security threat-whether of the Right,or the Left.  In addition, COINTELPRO* (Counter Intelligence Program), a Federal government operation that operated, full tilt, from the late 1920’s until at least 1985, is still being linked to Antifa (“Anti-Fascism”) and to certain Alt-Right organizations that have caused widespread death and injury.

With all that, the vast majority of people in this country are “sick and tired of being sick and tired”.  We get up each day, dress up and show up, for what is, by and large, a day to day process of fulfilling our responsibilities to family, friends, employers and community.  Whether we work for wages or as volunteers, we go about our days with integrity and a modicum of self-discipline.  None of this makes us saints, but it does, on average, make society better, little by little.

Hate, for most of us, is something we need like another orifice.  No matter who the hatemonger is-and I have seen instigators both of  the Far Right and Far Left, he/she is doing little to bring about the world that is said to be desired.  While, again, I do not claim to sit on the moral High Horse, I have done far more that is positive by showing love and respect, even to my critics and opponents.  Mom said, throughout our childhoods, “You get more with honey than with salt.”

8/8 is not a day for hate-nor is any other day.

*https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/COINTELPRO