Tag Archives: suicide

The Road to Diamond, Day 267: Needful Things

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

August 22, 2025- The girls were forthright in asking for help on their writing assignment, asking me to help, instead of one of the regular staff. They were crestfallen, when I told them I had to take care of other business on Monday-but that they would not be left alone. I trust that a caring soul will be on hand, and tend to their needs. I was able to meet those needs today, so it was a good day.

A friend shared memories of childhood; of witnessing lynchings-the sort described by Billie Holliday, in her song, “Strange Fruit”. This is something that no child should ever have to witness. Another friend shared the news that a young man had taken his own life, shattering her immediate community. This is something that no youth should ever need to contemplate. In my own work, keeping children safe from both external and internal trauma was a major focus of time and energy. It had to be done with regularity, and without judgment as to what the urgency level may have been.

I was not able to prevent all suicide. No one can know for certain what the turmoil is. inside another soul. The first friend has never spoken of what was seen, until now. The young man did not share his pain, even with his closest friends.

I am fortunate, in life here in Prescott and in the various places I have been honoured to visit, over the past fifteen years. Rarely has there been a closed door, and then only because of my own shortcomings or faux pas. With that good fortune has come a fair amount of responsibility. So, I don’t think of time spent anywhere as “vacation”, even though to those whose life commitment is to stay put and focus on one community or one neighbourhood, any time spent not working-or not spent “blooming where planted” is a lark.

So be it. I will wake each day, no matter where I find myself and make the same commitment to the well-being of those around me, as I did in schools and communities, across Arizona and in South Korea, for 46 years. Some of that will be in schools; other will be on the road or in communities where I might be expected to relax. It will be what appears to be needed.

A Queen and Her Precipice

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 5, 2022– It’s been a busy day, with a service project and two meetings to keep me honest, until mid-afternoon. This is all part of what Elizabeth Peru talks about, when discussing keeping the soul relevant and staying connected to the Oneness. Besides, I do things that I enjoy.

It is also bittersweet, as the morning paper brought an essay on Cheslie Kryst. The suicide of any young, highly intelligent, sassy, multi-talented and comely human being is a disaster, at both a deeply personal and a profoundly social level. I looked at the images of Cheslie and could only think, “God, I wish I had known her, could have intuited something was wrong and reached out. ” If I have been guilty of overkill in any area, it has been of a near obsession with the well-being of the younger generations.

Yet, I leave my son to forge his own destiny, while dropping everything when he calls. The thing is, he knows he CAN CALL, day or night, and I will drop everything else. I devote snippets of time, here and there, to those in my circle of friends, of all ages, whose issues are chronic, even seemingly intractable, with the understanding that I will get over to see them or at least talk with them, when I can. The bottom line is that each one continues to matter, and none need consign themselves to the scrap heap.

Cheslie Kryst had family who loved her dearly; friends and mentors who guided her, the best they knew how to guide. She had a loving group of well-wishers, who cheered her on, throughout her wonderful moments of triumph. There was also a chorus of dementors, who hounded her to end her life, and in that final, terrible end moment of dejection, that last group forced her hand.

Simply put, no one deserves the fate wished on them, by those whose own lives are miserable and who lack the courage to set those wrecked houses in order. No one deserves to feel so alone, even in the dark of night or early morning. If you read this, know that, in a moment of despair, you may reach out and I will find a way to send out a message of hope-that you may back away from that ledge of doom.

The Road to 65, Mile 39: Girls

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Posted by on in Social

January 6, 2015, Prescott-  The man whom I am helping, with some aspects of his current homelessness, went with me to one of my favourite coffee shops, this afternoon.  As we were talking about various subjects, the topic of girls and women came up.  Specifically, his left-over pain at having lost his sister, to suicide, some years ago, because of their father’s failing to ever, once, validate her achievements or her worth.  He has long known that gender has nothing to do with a person’s worth, and he misses her, to this day, as I would miss a sibling.

When I let the gentleman off, at a burger joint, and headed home for the night, I learned some things about how a person I love, as if she were my own child, has been treated, over the past few years.  To say I am livid, is a mild understatement.  There is not much I can do in this situation, ethically or legally, except vent, in the most opaque ways possible.  There is no point in muddying the waters of a situation which will be resolved, by cooler heads than mine.

So, generally speaking, in this year 2015, why are we still debating the same issue that our grandparents were considering, in 1945?  In 1905?  Why is anyone, in his right mind, looking at a woman, or a girl, as deriving her worth only from the men around her?  Why are anyone’s God-given talents and abilities subject to the sanction of an overseer?  Why does any male human require the person who is potentially his life partner, his equal in every respect that matters, the first teacher of his children, to be subservient?

We, in this society, love to throw stones at the Taliban, and other groups whom we perceive as having a medieval mindset.  Yet, so many men, right here, right now- and of EVERY ADULT GENERATION, decree themselves Lords and Masters.  I could never bring myself to do that.

My late wife and I had our share of struggles, misunderstandings and long debates.  None of them ever had as their core some sort of false notion about me being somehow superior in our relationship.  We were a team, of imperfect humans, and we were going to make it work.  So, we did, through all manner of mishaps and foibles, many of them my own, and we never, once, went to bed angry.

I guess it’s because my self-worth did not depend on her obeisance.  It depended on her approval, to some extent, and on her support, which never wavered.  Girls, and the awesome adults they become when given the love and support they deserve, are a cornerstone of humanity.  I never had a daughter, but there are so many in my world, whom I am proud to call friend- and would be very proud to call “my child”.  It will ever be so.