Category Archives: impediments

All In

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

December 15, 2025- There is only one constant, when transitioning from a long-time residence to taking over someone else’s long-time residence. It helps to have money set aside. I have found it will be in my best interests to invest in a U-Pod, which will mean two stages of the move, owing to Hana’s birth and the U-Pod’s schedule being on two separate wavelengths. I am only grateful that I can manage to do justice to both.

I divested myself of about half my wardrobe, saying goodbye to things that I have kept, but not worn and things that no longer fit. I have done the same to my book collection. Those volumes that I am unlikely to ever read, or that I have read and think will be enjoyed by others, have been passed on. Finally, the furniture: I have scant need for anything that is in this apartment, save a folding card table, once I am in Plano. Most will go to one thrift store or another. One piece is likely to be bought by someone in town.

Today was my last visit to the Coffee Klatsch, and last time volunteering at the Soup Kitchen. Both groups are filled with fond memories and people who will miss me as much as I do them. Life will go on, though, and a friend has already stepped up to take my place on the serving line. He will be an excellent fit for that operation, and made a good impression this evening.

So, the wall art and the small knick-knack keepsakes will be covered in bubble wrap. The family archives will be prepared for transport, some at the end of the week and the rest in the middle of next week. Our darling will appear in between it all. I am all in for the whole process.

Reason Returns

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

December 14, 2025- I did not go to Bellemont, and climb up a long flight of stairs, six times, in order to store six boxes of books in an already crowded room which few people will enter until next summer. I had considered that option, until early this morning.

My late wife appeared to me in a dream, as if she were right beside me. That was a nice sensation, and though I realized it was a different level of reality, some insights came to me. I got the message to check with our public library, to see if they would take 2 boxes of the books. They did so, gladly, thus bringing a more meaningful Baha’i presence to either their general stock, their saleable book collection, or both.

Regarding the actual move, consultation with my son led me to contact a possible moving assistance service, comparing their price with what it would cost me to do the move on my own. There are timing issues, as well, so I will see what their answer is. This is the U-POD system that is growing in popularity. It makes sense for people who have a high volume to move. I do not, but rather am just in that gray area, with a few too many keepsakes for one trip.

Reason made this day a nice one. I did not have to leave town, saving my energy for what lies ahead this week. I can get a lot more done tomorrow, and won’t have to worry about letting my family down, come next week.

Sunbows, Deer Antlers and Red Flags

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Entertainment, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 12, 2025- The sunbow appeared in the northern sky, as I walked downtown from HB I. It was an affirmation that all had ended well, after a tumultuous day. It was Acker Night, time to walk about and enjoy the lights, music and camaraderie that foreshadow Christmas here. I ran across several friends and walked around with Hiking Buddy Akuura and another one of her friends. The musical fare ran the gamut from hip hop to novelty Country. The latter included a revision of “Take Me Home, Country Roads”, with Arizona taking the place of West Virginia and US 89 replacing the generic country roads. There were fewer Grinches, and no Krampases in sight. There were plenty of children and dogs wearing deer antlers, though. It was also warmer and more serene than the pushing and shoving that has sometimes characterized the crowds downtown.

I had entertained thoughts of heading up to Bellemont, with six boxes of books, earlier this morning. It occurred to me, though, that time was getting short to advertise and sell the sofa hide-a-bed. So, I took the measurements and a couple of photographs, and posted on Craig’s List. It didn’t take long for the grifters to come out of the woodwork. Offers of purchase on Venmo and Zelle came via text. Needless to say, after ridding myself of three or four such pests, (one of whom sounded quite convincing, until his “coach” came on in the background and was heard telling him what to say), I found it necessary to call my bank. If the thieves had my contact info, they might have been able to hack my account. So, proper measures were taken to safeguard my assets. Nothing was compromised, in the end. I will sell the item for cash and nothing else. It was a good day of learning about private sales of items.

I will use Sunday as a Books to Bellemont day. It is a lot less stressful now, knowing that there are alternatives to driving back and forth from Prescott to Plano, twice. I will talk with U-Haul reps on Monday, for transport of what might not fit in Sportage.

These things, too, shall pass and Christmas in Prescott will remain a bright and shiny memory, for years to come. Plano, and the Metroplex, have their own holiday festivities. My family will enjoy them all, as a unit.

Absurdities vs. Solutions

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel, Uncategorized

December 11, 2025- A few of us gathered for a regular gathering, this afternoon, with illnesses and work trimming our numbers. There was a fair amount of interest in my schedule for departure and what might await me on the other end. Friends here are universally happy for me and family, while wistful about what it all means for the community. I know that I am hardly the be all and end all of anything, yet it feels nice to be so appreciated.

One friend gifted me with a small device that, inserted in the left ear, will alert with a buzz, if it senses a driver starting to doze off. This has not been a problem for me since the lowest point of my caretaking days, but it is best to be forearmed. I will use it faithfully, in the journey that lies ahead.

My morning had been occupied with cleaning out the spice cabinet. All those items that I had dutifully kept, from time immemorial, ended up discarded. Most glass bottles and metal boxes were carefully cleaned and placed in recycling. The worn out contents were properly placed in trash. Similar processes lie ahead for the office desk drawers, the clothes closet and the dresser. Then, there is the carport storage, either next Wednesday or Thursday. The book shelves are separated between “keep” and “donate”. Friends will come to look at the furniture, probably over the weekend, knowing that the sofa and the bed frame are headed elsewhere.

All this occupies me and generates solutions. There was a suggestion that I rent a large truck and tow Sportage. That would obviate any need for a second trip back and forth, but which is the absurdity and which, the solution, is still a matter of dollars, and sense. Aram and I will work that part out next week.

At least one medical provider has a counterpart in the Plano-Frisco area, and I can drive to that office, using a surface road. I’m hardly afraid of freeways, mind you, but have always made it my business to know the layout of secondary streets.

I go through this process, in the only way I know how, seeking solutions by talking things over with family and friends, and taking concrete steps forward, each day. I would like to see the same thing happen, in affairs of state, but there are so many who, it seems, are given over to absurdities. Eventually, solutions will present themselves, and not take “No’ for an answer. I prefer to have found them in a timely manner.

Giving Is Getting

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Posted by on in animal and plant life, Assistance, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

December 8, 2025, Banning- Two small piles of notebooks, coloured pencils, a therapeutic colouring book and post cards which had accumulated over the past fourteen years were offered to those gathered at the weekly Soup Kitchen. It took exactly fifteen minutes for six people to go through the offerings and take what suited them, in a discerning manner.

I will be doing more of that, over the ten days left to me to prepare for the move to Plano, especially as most of what I am giving was itself given me, following Penny’s passing, in 2011. Of course, it will largely go to Thrift Stores or to Habitat for Humanity, but new uses will be found for even the most well-worn items.

First, though, is my final visit to Orange County, at least until my granddaughter, whose birth is fourteen days away, attains toddlerhood. With that in mind, I took advantage of an easy clean-up after Soup Kitchen and headed west, through Arizona’s Outback and the Colorado Desert of eastern California. Only a couple of brief incidents coloured the generally smooth trip.

Between Aguila and Wenden, along US 60, there happened to be two rather large deer standing in the road. As Sportage approached, one deer went north and the other dashed south-no collision tonight!

Later, after I topped off the gas tank at Ehrenburg, a Honda Accord appeared to my left, as I was leaving the station-the driver bulling his way onto the road, to get ahead of me. Since he had been right behind a pick-up, I figured they were traveling together and he didn’t want to get separated. That was, until he zipped past the pick-up. Oh, well, we all got to stop, a half-mile further west, at the Ag Inspection. CHP also had a Safety Zone set up, for five miles through Blythe and just beyond, so we were all limited to 60 mph. Sometimes, taking ends up becoming giving, in terms of personal freedom. It’s often better to just go with the flow, at least when it comes to traffic.

From Wiley’s Well onward, the trip was uneventful, and I pulled into a different motel, the Margarita, around 10:15, PST. Tomorrow, I will meet my Orange County friend at Ladera Ranch and share my joys of this past year and the year to come.

Group Assistance

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, Community, Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Slow Food, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 7, 2025- Another holiday party/annual meeting/farewell gathering featured inventive, delicious organic and vegetarian fare-including my mixed greens and sunflower sprouts, with a dressing of lemon curd, Sicilian lemon balsamic and Persian lime olive oil, with a hint of paprika. The dressing was a particular hit with the group- and the host, a Master Chef, asked to keep what was left. Success!!

Part of the business meeting involved discussion of whether to donate funds to a Garden School in Africa, that serves HIV-ridden orphaned children. The group has helped the Director, herself uninfected, for the past three years, so it was not difficult to vote for continuance. We voted to double the amount suggested by our executive committee, with no objection from them. One of our members has been to that school twice, and will visit again, sometime next year.

It is hard for many people here to comprehend, but the conduit member said that HIV is still rampant in that particular part of Africa, as many men are unwilling to use hygienic protection in their intimate activities, leaving their women open to infection, which naturally gets passed on to any progeny. This situation was the basis for HIV-fighting funds from USAID. Now that the prevailing view in our government is that these funds just “reward bad behaviour”, the funds have been reduced, or eliminated, and it will take time for the miscreants to realize that no one is going to rescue them. The children are the ones who end up suffering. So, private groups like ours are taking up the slack-helping women and children directly.

Collective action is far more effective than assorted individuals trying to take up the mantle. Besides, I have to be on deck to focus my energies and resources on family first. I am grateful that projects like this are getting an organizational response.

Reality Checks

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 5, 2025- The earnest young man said, with a straight face, that he fully intended to finance a new vehicle, using his available income from a part-time job cleaning office buildings around his town. We went over the cost of the desired vehicle, the number of months it would take to pay off a loan-if one were even available and the amount of money he would have to set aside each month, just to pay the loan amount, never mind insurance, registration and maintenance. It didn’t take him long to pivot to calculating the monthly costs involved with purchasing a used car, for 1/4 the amount of a new vehicle.

When I was a similar age, I had a grand uncle who would calmly disabuse me of similar outlandish dreams. He never tried to actively talk me out of any pipe dream, but used facts, numbers and the sort of logic that said “This is all achievable-just some day, not right away.” In running this morning’s round table discussions with juniors and seniors at a local high school, regarding financial planning, I used the same mentoring tools. The students could see that I am still standing, even through a fair number of missteps and setbacks. My ending point was that it is not the mistakes that matter, in the end; it is the aggregate of lessons learned.

This morning, regarding grandparenting, I was reminded that the elder’s greater wisdom shines brightest from the ability to listen to the grandchild; to be the safe haven and by extension, the greatest emotional support. It takes nothing away from parents, but does offer the child another place where s(he) can feel validated. It is that affirmation that builds the emotional strength a person needs, to successfully withstand all manner of negative pressures.

Today’s seminars were a good round of practice in that regard.

Reading the Room

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 4, 2025- While mostly enjoying a gathering this afternoon, I got the sense that two of the higher-ranking people, in the group with which I have been involved, were not exactly thrilled with my decision to leave the area. A mutual friend said that was off the mark and that the management is actually supportive of my decision and is happy for me. One of the administrators hugged me before leaving, so my reading of the room was not quite on point.

One of the things that has indeed held me back, over the years, is a difficulty in reading people. I came to the conclusion, a while back, that oftentimes when I sense hostility or dislike from someone else, it is more a matter of how I am feeling about myself at the time. Many, if not most, people are neutral-to-supportive. Very few, actually, are hostile-and even if they are, the question begs, “Do I reflect something they don’t like about themselves?

I went to another gathering, this evening, putting these ideas to the test. A person who I previously had considered hostile was actually quite agreeable, jovial. Most of the people at the gathering were engaging and took an interest in one another. I felt at home, and recognized that any tension inside myself right now is likely processing the matter of leaving a place that has been home for fourteen years, and a state that has been home for all but six of the past forty-seven years.

It’s best to let the feelings flow, and know that all will be well, in the weeks to come and in the years that follow. I am getting better, at reading the room.

Tik-Tok

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Education, Entertainment, Family, impediments, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

December 1, 2025, Tucumcari- My friend sat across from me, in a crowded coffee shop, on the west side of Amarillo. He referred, a couple of times, to things he’d seen on Tik-Tok, a medium he finds amusing. A few minutes later, he told of posts on said medium that he found revolting.

I have never been a fan of Tik-Tok,nor of Snap Chat, Reddit or any other medium that relies, for its existence, on mass, conformity-based consumption of whatever drivel the worst among its contributors serves up, particularly in the form of “challenge”. Whoever dreamed up the nightmare that was “Tide Pod Challenge” (before Tik-Tok, in fairness) deserves to be consigned to the scrap heap of historical opprobrium. Its successors, some of which have found their way to Tik-Tok (i.e. Jam Jar Pulse Jet), likewise deserve nothing short of universal condemnation, for the resulting harm they cause both those who attempt them and their loved ones who are left to pick up the pieces of the person(s) left in relative ruin.

Tik-Tok could have become the purveyor of presentations that elevate humanity, the way Wikipedia and, for the most part, TED Talks and You Tube have become. Instead, we have the media promoter of the ethos that is reflected in that most odious of sentiments, “It’s better than Crack!” End of rant.

The day was, all in all, very nice. I bid farewell to my little family, for a few weeks, then found it fairly easy to exit Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex. The drive along Northwest Passage was easy, and I found my lunch stop, Valley Pecans, rather deserted. Somehow, I was about the first customer at that lovely cafe-emporium, and was, thankfully, followed by about a dozen other people. It was Noon, so high time for travelers to surface.

After my visit with friend, Wes, In Amarillo and a fuel stop, I made it to this high desert gem, taking this room at Rodeway Inn and heading to Del’s Diner, one of Tucumcari’s best. Del’s has been around since 1966, and the crowds, such as the one there tonight, are proof of its excellence. Martha and crew treated everyone special, tonight. The regulars attest that this is no fluke. It’s how the crew is every day, every meal. Viva Del’s; viva Tucumcari!

Staying On Point

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Family, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

November 30, 2025, Grapevine- My sole tasks today were recording measurements of two rooms in the Plano house, using the Notes application on my i-Phone, and doing my laundry. It was not a hard day. Son had to navigate traffic across the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex, as he does almost every day. He had the harder job. There is a fair number of unfocused, impetuous motorists here, as there are in nearly every major city on the planet. He got the job done just fine.

Much of the difficulty facing the human race has come from one or more people, in any given situation, becoming distracted. There are plenty of diversions competing for anyone’s attention, at any given time of the day: Sunrises and sunsets; cute animals; cute babies; text messages; phone calls; road accidents; attractive members of the opposite sex; billboards; alluring announcements on the radio or streaming device; even someone riding a horse on the side of the road. The tasks, though, remain the same: Drive safely; pay attention to the person in front of you; finish what you start.

I think of this, as I plan out one of the most tightly-choreographed months in quite a while. Not since July, 2011 have I had to face a sea change in my living situation. It will need to be done carefully, and attentively, both because of time frame and because the feelings of so many people, who mean a great deal to me, need to be kept in mind. The most important, of course, are my little family. Others also matter, and so December will see lots of hugs and handshakes and “Thank you for being my friend, all these years.” The saving grace, in each instance, is the continuity offered by social media.

All I can promise anyone is that I will stay on point, and get the tasks of transition done, to the every best of my ability, doing justice for all concerned.