Category Archives: impediments

Diligencia

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

April 25, 2024- The rain came down in buckets, ending three weeks of dryness and keeping the fire danger down for another month or so. I had a room full of Kindergarten English-language learners, who noted that it was raining-again (“Otra vez”) and they hadn’t been out all day. They continued to work on their foldable stories, we read them, they highlighted their sight words, the first letter of each sentence and the punctuation mark at the end of each sentence-and then we played. They built little “forts”, by moving chairs and cushion pillows, while a timer counted down. When the time ran out, the screen said “Poof”, and the hamburger on the screen disappeared. Then the kids did-actually, just going back to their classrooms, after putting everything back.

The others, first and second graders, were equally diligent. Even those, especially those, who had minimal competency in English, applied themselves to their tasks with a drive that people in high school would do well to emulate. They let no time elapse, when finished with one task, before asking what was next, and diving right into it.

That made me think. What happens in the lives of children to turn a hard worker into a dodger, a slacker? Some who go through a slacking phase, and then get their bearings and turn into productive adults, can say it was due to the adults in their lives being alternately overbearing and overindulgent. Others gave in to peer pressure, and others were just testing the limits. In the end, though, those who’ve turned themselves around have looked back at the real “good old days”, when their classmates and they were getting satisfaction from learning, going home to parents who were genuinely proud of their achievements.

The fog of insolence can sink in as early as 7-years of age (I saw one, a scowl on his face, as he waited for his teacher to open the classroom door, while my students and I were walking towards the ELL room). It will likely take a lot of diligence, on the part of educators and social service professionals, to turn his life around. Such a shame. The high achievers will walk on past him, but the smartest among them will stop, turn around and hold out a caring and insistent hand.

Viva diligencia!

Nonstop Talking

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 24, 2024- I asked myself, how long would I last, as a nonstop talker, before someone broke out the duct tape-or everyone just up and left, even if-especially if- I was in the middle of my 286th sentence.

Then I began to think about how I am, myself, towards nonstop talkers. If they are children in a class, I appeal to the their recognition “that there is an agenda, set by the regular teacher, who has to honour the hierarchy from the State Legislature to the State Superintendent to the County Superintendent to the District Governing Board to the District Superintendent-to…” until a bright shining face offers….”Now who’s the nonstop talker?”

If the nonstop talker is a shut-in, chances are the monologues will be looped, and I will be able to repeat them, verbatim, after about a month of visits. I will still visit, though, and still listen, because this could be me one day. Besides, when every day sounds the same, it’s partly because every day is the same.

If the motormouth has encyclopedic knowledge of ten different subjects, I will want to be seen and not heard, because there are significant gaps in anyone’s knowledge, and we need to check-in with each other, and the nonstop thinker who can put thoughts into words deserves a full platform.

These thoughts came to mind, this evening, as I witnessed nonstop talkers, talking over one another. Thankfully, they each came to a happy medium and let each other have the dais, for a few minutes at a time. I would not do well, as a nonstop talker.

Degrees of Separation

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 23, 2024- The individual, always congenial and engaging in the past, did a complete 180 today, glaring at all but a few chosen co-workers, and tersely responding to well-wishes. Fortunately, this turnabout did not get directed towards children, but was rather puzzling to the rest of us. It was hopefully just the result of a random bad day.

Things like this put me on guard, though, as there were many mercurial and unpredictable people in my childhood, mostly teenagers, but several adults as well. I learned to be very guarded, a tactic my mother also stressed was essential for my safety and well-being. That mantra has played in my background ever since. It was playing today, though fortunately the children with whom I worked were co-operative and appreciative.

This brings me to the matter of the separation, the barriers people put up, even against those who clearly mean no harm. Groups do this also, and with a vengeance. In the worst cases, there are laws, ad hoc groups and social customs that enforce separation. More commonly, language speaks to the barriers: Prefixes, like “anti”, “un” and “non”, meant to enforce “Us vs. Them”; Nouns and adjectives, like “alien”, “illegal”, “filthy”, “degenerate”, even “homeless” are employed to suggest that someone’s presence is an impediment to the well-being of the dominant society.

Arguably, none of us can be sweetly all-accepting of all behaviours. Yet, I can’t get past the notion that, in the Divine Creation, there is no other-unless the construct that Jesus the Christ called “Satan” or “the devil” is somehow to be maintained as a competitor to the Creator. The lower nature of the human mind, which is what was really meant by that construct, is also behind the us vs. them mindset. Without fear, hate and envy, there is no “other”; there is only us, only we.

When the out-of-sorts individual gets past whatever caused the anger shown today, perhaps there will be one less person towards which my guard will need to be maintained. That is the joy of not seeing anyone as “the other”.

Power Language

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 19, 2024- When I was a child, the concept that every blow delivered would be followed by an equal and opposite retaliatory strike was alien to me. I thought, naively, that a simple exchange of blows was enough for each boy to express his annoyance at the situation. My opponents uniformly believed that there had to be a winner and a loser.

There has been much discussion, over the past five years, about Love Language-the way in which an individual gives and receives love. My love language, for example, is acts of service. Words of affirmation, quality time and physical touch are secondary love languages-expressed only to a certain few.

Power is also a concept that is expressed in “languages” of sorts. (These are only my thoughts on the matter.) The power languages I have ascertained are persuasion, coercion, diminution, guilt-mongering and inclusion. The first and last are positive means to power. The second, third and fourth are negative, if not neurotic, power languages.


Both persuasion and inclusion involve patience, flexibility and a regard for others that is equal to one’s self-regard. Persuasion entails a commitment to a lengthy engagement with those whose agreement and co-operation are desired. Inclusion entails an inherent regard for the other person’s, or group’s, sense of self-worth. Inclusion is a longer game, in which the perception of power, coming from within the self, is large enough a reservoir that the individual sees others as being of the same worth as self. The two power languages do not entail a lesser view of either oneself or any other human being. They may even extend to non-human animals, plants, funga and spirits.

Coercion, often involving physical force, but also including bribery, co-opting, blackmail and obfuscation, is the most common historical power language. Even in modern times, the cynic’s Golden Rule, “He who has the gold makes the rules”, has silenced those whose financial or time-management skills are sufficiently wanting, that a keen observer who is hungry for power can leverage the person’s weakness and buy or intimidate them into giving up their agency.

Diminution, the convincing of social groups of their own unworthiness and of the superiority of others, is a second very common historical power language. It is the modus operandi of the plantation, of the colonial system and of patriarchy. Diminution depends on a top-down decision-making apparatus. It goes beyond the sensible system of parenthood, infantilizes women, disempowers adolescents, and instills a sense of superiority in members of a dominant culture. This is most obvious in the notions of White Supremacy and Male Superiority, but is also true of any culture where a dominant group trivializes the contributions of marginalized communities.

Guilt-mongering is the “when all else fails” power language of dominance. It features self-as-victim, gaslighting, false equivalence and an “after all I’ve done for you” pitch, each of which is like a rock in a shoe, designed to nettle and disrupt the other’s concentration and sense of well-being. It manifests itself in endless legal appeals and slow-walking of valid processes, just enough to create doubt and suspicion. It is a favoured tool of those among the well-connected who lack a moral compass. It is also a favoured tool of those in the media whose primary concern is generating revenue, at the expense of morality.

We are seeing a slow, but inexorable, move towards persuasion and inclusion as preferred power languages. The futility of coercion, diminution and guilt-mongering is being seen by more and more people around the world, as their perceived value is recognized, more and more, as impermanent, ephemeral and of scant overall value. The language of power will, in time, become linked to the language of love.

Gordian Knots

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

April 18,2024- A bit ago, a boy in an intermediate school was placed in detention, for hitting a girl classmate. He told the principal that he felt demeaned by the girl and her friends, so he did the only thing he knew-he lashed out.

Anxiety fuels fear, which fuels aggression, which fuels more anxiety and aggression-all tied up in a Gordian knot. The legend of Alexander the Great has the king using the expedient solution of cutting a complex knot with a sword, rather than trying to loosen and unravel it. Modern times find certain rulers using brute force, in an attempt to bring an end to “intractable” problems. Thus, a series of events that would be amusingly schoolboyish, were they not so chilling, are unfolding between two countries-in the guise of preservation of faith.

Thomas Sowell’s admonition that there are no solutions, only trade-offs, has never rung more true than in the matter of the conflict in western Asia. The resolution of this matter involves, essentially, two basic processes: 1. All people living within the borders of a nation-state need to have a full voice in the affairs of that nation-state, provided they are willing to abide by the laws of that nation-state; 2. Countries that neighbour one another need to fully honour the legitimate rights of all people in their neighbouring states, to say nothing of honouring the legitimate rights of their own citizens. The trade-offs will need to be worked out, but they cannot allow dominance of any one country, or national ideology, or authoritarian ruler, over its neighbours.

I’m keeping an eye on the situation in western Asia, at least for the effect it will have on my plans for Autumn, which presently involve transit stops in two airports in that region. Those places need to show a modicum of safety, in order for anyone to make even the briefest of stops. There is also the impact the conflict will have (is at least temporarily having) on global finance. The possibility exists that I may be working for wages in October, instead of visiting Baha’is in east Africa, after my September visit to the Philippines.

Fear triggers anxiety, which brings on aggression, triggering more fear and anxiety. I face all this, knowing that in either Plan A or Plan B, I will be okay on a personal level. Many communities and countries will get through the matter, just fine. There will, however, be vast areas, and millions of people, who won’t be at all fine-with the situations in Gaza, Darfur and Ukraine just the beginning, unless the Gordian Knots are untied, rather than cut.

Turnarounds

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 16, 2024- The nine-year-old said, matterfactly, that he had stopped himself, twice today, from acting out and engaging in negative actions. He started to misbehave, then decided it would be better to act as a leader. He is the oldest child in his classroom, and it was also important that a girl, who is his friend in another classroom, does not approve of acting out.

I routinely think of my own actions and speech. Do they fit what is becoming of someone in a leadership role? Would my spirit guides approve? Would the woman I love the most, to say nothing of my dear friends, be happy or would they be dismayed? It is of the utmost importance, to hold oneself to a gold standard.

There are all manner of turnarounds that are occurring in this time of transition. Some can be attributed to climatic change, to El Nino or La Nina. Deserts, from Death Valley, California to the Arabian Peninsula and the Dasht-e-Lut, of Iran, are experiencing intense rain that has not been seen in modern times. The United Arab Emirates and Oman are virtually shut down, from the flooding that has ensued. These desert countries are not alone. Rainfall has intensified in Central Asia and western Siberia, as well, and the Cone of South America, especially Argentina and Uruguay, had an extraordinarily wet summer (December-January). Conversely, the islands of Southeast Asia are experiencing a drought, as the tail-end of El Nino runs its course.

Transitions and turnarounds are apt to continue for at least the next fifteen months, both in a climatic sense and in our daily lives, as the solar maximum plays out, between now and September, 2025. Nothing really surprises me, anymore.

Mislaid Plans

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Hiking and Nature, Historical, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

April 15, 2024- The rock that lined the unpaved road was navigated very slowly, as I drove along, looking for a place called Jeronimo’s Cabin. It was not that of the great Apache warrior, but belonged to one Jeronimo Pena, a lumberjack who lived alone on Mingus Mountain, from the 1920s until his death, in 1957. He transported his cords of wood using his burros, having cut the wood using a crosscut saw-strictly low tech and living a simple life, preferring to forage for his food, and that of the burros.

It happened that I turned left, about ten yards too soon, following a track that was just shy of the parking area, from which I could have walked the trail that leads to the cabin. I left the hike for another time, until I could more completely research the matter (which I did tonight, upon returning home.) The rub came, when I found that a piece of shale had become embedded in the front right tire. When I managed to get the resulting flat to a shop, the puncture turned out to be irreparable. Shale can be a very tough adversary, even when one takes a road with slow diligence.

Jerome, with Haunted Hamburger and Flatiron Coffee House, was a silver lining to all this. I was also able to get a good deal on the two back tires, which needed replacing, prior to my upcoming cross-country journey. There is always a future pay-off for a short term setback, if one pays attention. I will find Jeronimo’s Cabin, sometime in June, or in late Fall, before it snows. Not having to go on the shale-flecked road again, will be a bonus.

Sunset Pioneers

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 13, 2024- Last night, I pondered what role medication has played in my mother’s recent health woes. A friend here has had his medication adjusted, at his daughters’ insistence, and the barely cognizant soul, who had us all concerned , has resumed being his relatively feisty self. Apparently, Mom’s doctor had similar thoughts, and the resulting adjustments have made her a bit more like her old self.

This is good news for us all, and while we are not under any illusion, as to the long-term, being able to follow her instructions, that I not give short shrift to my obligations here, will be true to both her steadfast insistence over the years, that our word should be our bond and to my own sense of integrity. So long as her condition is stable, I will keep on with activities in Home Base I, both Baha’i and secular, and will head out across the continent, in the evening of April 28.

We are each pioneering our sunset years: Mom, my siblings, most of my cousins, surviving aunts, a good many of my friends, including my dearest, and yours truly. That means as many different things as there are of us. It means varying health challenges, of which thankfully I have very few, to date and which most have faced with a great deal of fortitude and resilience. I am proud of each one who has faced down aching joints, diabetes and macular degeneration, with corrective surgery, both natural and allopathic cures and a steady regimen of physical therapy. It means having a can-do spirit.

This most recent scare has reminded one and all that family comes first, then community and after that, the wider humanity. I stand firm on each of those counts. This pioneering life will continue in good stead.

The Flow of Life

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 12, 2024- During the course of the day, at least 64 people donated blood, in a small conference suite of Frontier Village, a Prescott shopping center, located 2.1 miles from the center of town. Each person potentially saved the life of a hospitalized individual, a victim of a fire, or of a car crash, or a beating. In the days when assaults on strangers seem to be increasing, sixty-four people chose to help someone they did not know. A few of them told me, the registrar of the Blood Drive, of how someone else had once helped a family member in need.

Across the country, my mother is alert, mildly talkative, still taking minimal nutrients, and pondering the flow of life. She is ninety-five years of age, has seen four children and ten grandchildren grow to adulthood. She is seeing nineteen great-grandchildren grow into solid human beings. Through it all,she has been a stellar example of how to face challenges, head-on. Her life is flowing towards the delta that is the gateway to the ocean of eternity. It has been, by all indications, a grand journey.

Here in Home Base I, increasing numbers of people are facing the reckoning that always comes with ignoring a simple rule of life: Other people matter, every bit as much as oneself does. The person in a crosswalk, the rider of a motorcycle, a bicycle or a skateboard, the person standing in line ahead of you are not objects to be conveniently shoved aside or targets to be struck by a vehicle. Red lights, stop signs and temporary barriers, or detours, are not nuisances to be ignored, out of a desire for convenience. People who hold an opinion that differs from one’s own are not monsters to be slain or idiots to be publicly humiliated. I know that every community faces a similar challenge, in a world that still is plagued by anonymity and self-absorption. That self-absorption, though, is always headed towards a dead end.

The flow of life will ever go, in the direction that the Universe intends, and while that sometimes seems to head in odd tangents, in the end, it will likewise find its way to the Most Great Ocean.

Discretion and Honour

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Education, Historical, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 9, 2024- I received one of the last pieces of my personal health and security tools, in the mail, yesterday. It is a system that will bring me back to the U.S., and to my Home Base, if I am injured or become ill, whilst in any other country. It will help in finding medical or dental providers in that other country, should they become necessary. It also connects with Intelligence services, to let me know if conditions in a given nation warrant staying away from that country. These are in addition to the advisories issued by the U.S. Department of State.

I was, for a time, considering a visit to the capital of a country, which I have found intriguing for many years. The latest intelligence shared is that the capital is the only place in that country that is relatively safe. In other words, the place is not exactly stable, and I wouldn’t be doing anyone a favour, by showing up there. Having promised my loved ones that I will not go pell mell into harm’s way, I have crossed that country off my itinerary, for a journey this coming autumn.

Today was the Day of Valor, a national day of remembrance, in The Philippines, and also called Araw ng Kagitingan (Bataan Day). It honours the Filipino and American soldiers who fought in the Battle of Bataan. This was one of the first battles in the Pacific, during World War II, that I learned about as a child-even before I knew much about the Filipino people. My uncle and cousin told the narrative about Bataan, and the Death March that those captured by the Japanese were forced to endure. Many were killed, and a relative few made the 65 mile force march to Camp O’Donnell, in the central part of Luzon, unscathed. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bataan_Death_March The importance of this event today is to underscore the value of resilience and fortitude, which lead to unity, to the thriving of The Philippines, or for the success of any nation.

So, the concepts of discretion and honour were much on my mind today.