November 9, 2024- Everyone deserves to chart their own course.
It turns out that the recent messages I received have little to do with me, at all. At some point in the not too distant future, the woman I love most in this world will be looking to find a position in a very sacred place. It is her long cherished dream to do this, so the last thing I ever want to do is be an impediment.
At this point in my life, the joy that would come from holding her or just being close to her is as nothing, when compared to the satisfaction of seeing my beloved K achieve this goal. Too often, even now, the dreams of one person, usually a woman, are subordinated to those of one, usually a man, who assumes a dominant role.
The thing I’d like to see more men, more people, embrace and foster the dreams of those they claim to love. Kathy will do so much good in any position she may take, at this most sublimely holy of spots, in service at a material level. Seeing her do this is dearer to my heart than any conventional relationship, as exhilarating as that would be. Seeing her reach any of her goals means the world to me.
My own course, at this point, will be determined largely by the needs of my little family and of this most cherished woman. I have lived a full and satisfying life, thus far, and accomplished many of my goals. Now, it is time to cheer on my loved ones, whether at their side or from afar.
November 2, 2024- The appeal came, as I was preparing to help break down the Farmers Market operation, just after noon. There was an urgent need for someone to supervise a shelter in Roswell, twelve hours away by car and about six hours away, by a combination of air and road vehicles. I had a week, no more, to assist, and even that involved reneging on prior commitments closer to Home Base. After a fair amount of discussion, back and forth, between the decision makers, someone else stepped up, and offered two weeks of volunteering. I am grateful to that person, as I’m sure the people of Roswell will be.
Across the Pacific, in the Bicol region of eastern Luzon, thousands suffered from the wrath of Typhoon Kristine, late last month. I was in Manila, at that time, and maintained contact with a friend who had been helpful to me, when I was navigating between Naga and Daet, in October, 2023. She lost everything in the typhoon’s wake, so I will help with two essential aspects of her recovery. For the bulk of the regeneration, though, the community must rise up and help one another.
That is the way it will need to be, worldwide, over the next many decades-both for the rest of my earthly life and well beyond (like 2050, or 2060 to 2100.) Each of us, no matter how young or old, has a role to play in facing emergencies. My dearest wrote me, this morning, about an emergency she is helping to mitigate. These can be large or small, but will be faced by a heart connection and judicious pooling of resources-financial, material, physical and social. Backing all of that is spiritual energy. When things seemed direst, with regard to the disaster in Roswell (flooding and its aftermath), spiritual pleas went up and the volunteer was found, who could serve as needed. Collective prayer can alleviate the effects of pending disaster, and help gather forces to deal with turmoil that is unanticipated.
Let us work together, unceasingly, to tame the whirlwind.
October 29, 2024- I “worked” today, basically being a warm certified body, covering for a friend who needed to be in another room at her school, so as to focus on Individual Education Plans (IEPs), which I well remember are the bane of a Special Needs teacher’s existence. (Penny was a long-time SPED teacher.) My biggest challenge was to keep myself occupied, as the long-time and well-regarded Paraprofessional tended to all the instructional activities. I re-read just about all of H.G. Wells’ “The Time Machine”, (one of my favourite novels, in my teenage years) and took a couple of surveys, regarding my daily routine as a High Functioning Autistic person. Seems I have few of the issues that I once had, especially in connecting with other people and in staying on task.
I also have reflected on my recent journey to the Philippines. A few times, I felt that things were a bit too rushed, especially the last day. K, though, was more concerned about my getting to the airport on time-and on most occasions, it’s well-advised to allow four hours, prior to an international flight. So, my beloved was acting out of love, as she has for the past year. I am in love with a complete human being, not with an idea, as I explained to someone who had said “Maybe you’d be better off with _____________, than with K.” No, I wouldn’t, necessarily. Kathy communicates in subtleties and in statements of loving concern. I am more effusive with my terms of endearment. Her love is expressed in her eyes and smile.
I have mentioned that, when traffic signals change, the pedestrian signals, both red and green, are timed. Filipinos, both on motorcycles and in automobiles/trucks, are careful to NOT hit pedestrians. There is a subtle communication between driver and walker, in most cases. When I am crossing the street with Kathy, though, I am between her and the vehicles, and my outside hand goes up. No one will hurt my beloved. Otherwise, I rely on that subtle communication.
When in a community, I participate in events that are dear to my friends. Thus, I was at the funeral of a woman I never met. She was one of Kathy’s Baha’i mentors, which alone made it important for me to be present. She was also a major contributor to the well-being of the Philippine Baha’i community. Thus, I had lunch with the renovation crew at the Manila Baha’i Center, every day that I was in the neighbourhood. Mom taught us that no one was either above or below us, in terms of occupation or social status. I have lived this, for seventy-three years.
Attention to subtleties is also good for the mindfulness that helps to avoid dementia. That, and a diet based on fresh and unadulterated foods and beverages, has kept me pretty sharp, at least for the past forty years. There is no accounting for how I was as a child or teenager, not to mention as a young adult.
I am just about done with the jet lag that seemed to be more intense, this time around. Still, I haven’t missed any subtle hints.
August 15, 2024- Recent memes and diatribes have been directed at both of the major candidates for Vice President of the United States. They have stemmed from insinuations, mostly by people who have themselves never donned a military uniform and dogpiled by a few disgruntled former colleagues of each man, that the former soldier in question was amplifying his service record. Each candidate has taken the bait, and denigrated the other, to a certain extent. The term “stolen valor” has been used to describe the record of one, who has at least called for respecting everyone’s military service, including that of his opponent.
I will include attachments that accurately explain the service records of Timothy Walz and of James David Vance, but let me first go over my own military service record. Like the two candidates, I carried a weapon of war- in my case, an M-16. I used it twice: When qualifying in Army Basic Training (Fort Jackson, SC), and in a training exercise at a military firing range in Long Binh, Vietnam. I did not have to use it in combat.
My service was as a handler of U.S. mail, running a mail room in the TriService Barracks at Fort Myer, VA, from October, 1969-January, 1971 and running accountable mail (registered, insured and certified) in secure rooms at Long Binh and at Cholon, Vietnam, from March, 1971-January, 1972. I did my fair share of guard duty, while at Long Binh, but no provocateurs appeared during the nights I was at the perimeter post. Long story short-No combat.
I returned to civilian life on January 2, 1972 and went back to college, holding my own in an environment in which I had previously made a mess of things, when fresh out of high school. The discipline and sense of purpose that I acquired in the Army has come in handy, across a variety of situations, over the ensuing sixty-two years.
So, it is with the utmost respect for the United States Armed Forces, and all comrades-in-arms who have served, whether in a combat role or like me, in a supportive capacity, that I ask those who have not served, to do your diligence, before throwing up memes or quoting “sour grapes” reports that do not stand up to scrutiny. I ask those who have served-especially in combat, to respect those of us who had your backs. That includes the Reserve Units, who have actually been in combat theaters in the most recent conflicts.
Here are links to verifiable, diligent accounts of the service rendered by Tim Walz and by J.D. Vance. Both men deserve our gratitude, with regard to that service.
August 8, 2024- The number eight was in serial mode, in a few places today. I went off towards breakfast at 8:18 and this evening, when I pulled out of the carport, the odometer read 808080. Of course, this is the eighth day of the eighth month and the digits of 2024 add up to the number 8. It is a lucky, powerful number-except for Wild Bill Hickok, when he held that infamous hand.
Eight requires its holder to take informed action, which may have been why Sheriff Hickok took a bullet, as he allegedly was sitting with his back to the saloon door. Awareness of surroundings, now, as then, is the only way one can confidently move forward-whether on one’s feet, or sitting.
For me, today was a day to set a definite agenda for the final 4.5 months of 2024, knowing that the biggest item on the list will very likely have implications for the rest of my earthly life. Every atom of the Universe seems to be telling me to head for the Philippines next month, with full confidence. The last time I got such a strong message, I found myself alongside the woman who helped me get rid of a fair amount of personal baggage and embrace the Faith of Baha’ullah.
So the rest of August will see several faith-based gatherings, medical check-ups, Tagalog lessons (online) and a renewed fitness push. September and October will start and end with service activities here at HB I, but will mostly be across the Pacific, with similar service activities and building friendships. November and December will find me back in Arizona, with the focus largely dependent on what happens across the ocean.
I know one thing: The right thing will happen. I will be in a good place, come January 1, 2025. I will not sit with my back to the door, gamble or no gamble.
July 19, 2024, Victoria, BC- The distraught woman was yelling, at everyone and at no one, as I walked toward Bold Butchery and Grill in search of a falafel dinner. She was adamant that “he” had no business telling her to clean her room. The “room” was a small dome, that actually looked quite tidy. I saw no male around there, so who knows whether the “boss” was present, or was an unwanted memory of a past overlord. There are about twenty-five people living in tents along and adjacent to Quadra Street, down a bit from Turtle Hostel, where I am spending the night. There are about twenty-five of us in the hostel. Only four walls and the ability to pay for lodging really separate the two groups.
Joseph Campbell, in “Myths of Light”, describes the primal cakra of kundalini yoga as muladhara, the “root lotus”, the most basic urge to hold onto something which represents one’s identity. We see this in everyone, from a politician holding onto an office to a soldier fighting to the death, to someone living on the street and guarding personal space, along with the few possessions that are there within that zone. I tend to exercise reasonable precaution and care of my possessions, so that I have what I need, day to day. Obsession with them left, quite a few years back, as the realization set in that there was nothing that couldn’t be replaced-except my life. It has also been thirty-two years since I was homeless, and even then, my little family and I were not living in a tent, but in a motel-and that was only for a month or so. I wish smoother sailing for the folks in this little community, who do seem to take care of one another. There is even a “mayor”, who lives in an RV that is parked across the street from the ornate Conservatory of Music. He was making the rounds this evening, seeing who needs what basics, which he will try to find, when he goes to the Farmers Market tomorrow.
I will meet a Baha’i friend across town tomorrow morning, spending a bit of time along the waterfront, and praying for another friend, who is laid up a bit. That has been the nature of this journey-to connect with members of my Faith community who have felt a bit isolated, of late. So far, it has worked out, and if there are no Baha’is to visit, I have been able to connect with other old friends who I haven’t met in person.
I left the incomparable Bayside Motel, on Bellingham’s commercial strip, after getting Sportage its overdue maintenance check. All is well, and the lead mechanic remarked that the vehicle is in tiptop shape. Lord knows I pay attention to it. Bayside is a reasonably-priced establishment, that keeps up with the chains, when it comes to things like breakfast and a guest laundry room, as well as the sheer comfort of the sleeping room itself.
I got to the ferry terminal at Tsawassen, a bit early, and so had to drive around a bit, then return to the gate. The computer system resets on the hour, so a 1 p.m. check-in does not mean 12:55. Once in queue, there was plenty to do, in passing two hours-between lunch, writing to my resurfaced friend and organizing what I could of still-damp laundry, drying in the car. (Long story short, the dryers at Bayside were taken up by one family, and check-out happened before the clothes could be finished. At least they’re clean!)
The ferry ride was smooth, I napped for a while and it was easy to find Turtle Hostel. As indicated above, this is a somewhat artsy area. It also has several Mediterranean restaurants, which is good for my palate. Bold Butchery and Grill has several varieties of hummus to go with its excellent falafel. I chose the turmeric version. After dinner, it was easy to connect on a Zoom devotional, then segue into a section of Myths of Light that talks about the seven bodily cakras.
Smooth sailing depends on self-knowledge, so I am definitely interested in continuing to learn what Joseph Campbell had to say about the upper cakras.
June 4, 2024- There was a fair amount of activity in downtown Winslow, as I approached my favourite spot there: Relic Road, which is also called Sipp Shoppe. The place is another of those that just has a relaxed and welcoming vibe, so being time for lunch, I stopped in for a bit-and was revived, somewhat, for the drive down mountain to Camp Verde and on back here to Home Base I. Of course, I pulled over, about ten miles shy of Happy Jack and took a power nap, but between the two, lunch and rest did the trick. Journey # 1 of 2024 is a wrap.
A day or so ago, I got a text from one of the other volunteers at Solid Rock soup kitchen, asking if I would be there that night. I was still in northwest Texas, at that point in time, and so, just fed him my schedule and the next time I would be on the serving line. June is Arizona-centric, but somehow not a whole less busy. Tomorrow, I head downtown and join another Baha’i to meet with our Congressman’s staff, regarding the situation of the Baha’is in Iran, who as readers know, are being actively persecuted by some in positions of power in that country.
Friday starts 8 days at Bellemont, a Baha’i facility west of Flagstaff, where I will oversee the camp operations for a gathering of Youth (ages 16-20). This will be the largest event I have run, since the Red Cross shelter in Watsonville, a year ago in April. As was the case then, a wonderful, competent team is in place, so all issues that arise will be ably handled.
There are other activities this month, and for some reason, they all fall on Saturdays. My presence at Farmers Market’s breakdown, therefore, will be negligible, until August. That raises the issue of inconvenience. What is a chance to be useful to one person or group takes away from others. Solutions? There are a few-and I started with gentling reminding myself that there are 80,000 + people in this mini-Metro. Any presumption that an event will fail because I am not there is an ego trip that is best nipped in the bud. My friends know my heart, and will be able to carry on just fine when life takes me elsewhere.
We are not here to be creatures of convenience to others, but only are here to do the best we can, when and where we can be there. The flip side, of course, is to not be in the way-as I assured someone I love especially dearly, this evening, regarding time I will spend in and around her area, in the Fall. Life is an unending series of carefully choreographed dances, unending focuses of attention, that require careful judgment, as to when to engage and when to stand back. As my mother taught us, “It’s not about ME”.
Albert Camus, in his essay on the myth of Sisyphus, makes the summation: “What counts is not the best living, but the most living.” I would go one further step: What counts is the most of the best; the latter meaning Offering one’s own best, in the most situations.
June 3, 2024. Moriarty- The world is not so much finite, as it is a place of temporary systems. Each system has its unlimited aspects, each can only hold so much, at any given time. A stomach can only hold so much food; a cerebrum can only focus on so many thoughts, at any given time; a bladder can only hold so much fluid; a bank or credit union can only hold so many accounts; a border station can only process so many visitors, properly, on any given day-and so on.
Eventually, any given lack can be replenished. Any given problem, no matter how novel, can be solved. So it is, that I focus my energies on meeting some expenses as they occur, paying others in advance and making provisions for the maintenance and replenishment of my savings, however much they may be temporarily be needed in the interim. So it is, that I schedule time at Home Base I, no matter that I might be called away again-as is the case this weekend and next week, as well as in the second half of July-and in the Fall. So it is that time is set aside for health-related check-ups, and regular cycles of exercise, diet and rest, as a means of avoiding serious illnesses down the road.
Today was a long drive-from Grapevine (Home Base II) across a vast swath of northwest Texas and eastern New Mexico, to this favoured way station, roughly 30 minutes east of Albuquerque. I did not stop to visit friends along the way, because it is a workday and because I need to focus on choreographing the rest of my week rather tightly. A surprisingly nice lunch, at a Pilot Travel Center, in Rhome, TX and a few stops for refueling along the way, made the whole day flow. This coming Wednesday until Friday of next week is a busy time, mostly for faith-based activities. “To whom much is given, much is expected.”
May 29, 2024, Dickson, TN- The little girl saw an elephant, a red horse, octopus suction cups, a jellyfish, as our party of six visitors and two guides walked along the cavern path. We all saw the ghost of George Washington, a Persian palace, various wooden ships, Lover’s Lane, Dante’s Inferno and a grand ballroom, within the confines of the southern sector of Grand Caverns.
This is the vacation part of my journey. In between family visits and days of service, I am in the Southland, taking in natural wonders of this incredible cavern system and, in the days to come, a few historic sites. The guides, Lily and Malachi, are fonts of knowledge about this system, only half of which is open to general tours, with another 1/3 available for an “Adventure Tour” package-which I would consider on a different visit, if a certain someone is interested in coming along. Time will tell.
The day started nicely, with a light breakfast at Broad Porch Coffee House, the latest successor to beloved and sorely-missed Artful Dodger. The counter staff have the same bright energy and sweet disposition that Jasmin (not her real name) had, ten years ago. Maybe it’s the feng shui of the place.
Leaving Harrisonburg, I noted a sign for the little town of Grottoes, which intrigued me enough to turn off and head east on the small Virginia highway. Grottoes have fascinated me since the days when one was able to visit the three waterfalls of Jeju, Korea. (Those waterfalls have since been expropriated by a Chinese businessman, who uses their water for his own ends.) The name of the Virginia town is drawn from Grand Caverns, discovered serendipitously by a curious teenager, in 1804. The caves became a tourist attraction, shortly thereafter, and remain so to this day, the oldest show caves in the United States.
Lily explained, without editorial comment, that both Stonewall Jackson and Union officer Dixon Miles had brought their men into the caverns, at various times. No battle was fought in the caves, though there was a skirmish on Cave Hill, above the labyrinthine system. (Dixon Miles is remembered for planning to surrender Harpers Ferry, but died before he could do so. Stonewall Jackson, of course, ended up being shot and killed by one of his own men, in what was officially called “a case of mistaken identity”.)
Here are some scenes of the caverns. For perspective, the guides explained, note that stalactites (ceiling-based) and stalagmites (floor-based) grow at a rate of 3 cubic inches a year. The collective term for these formations, and for any other cave formation, is speleothem. That includes all the animals that the girl saw, and the ghost of George.
The ElephantThe Hitching Post
After this incredible seventy-minutes, I thanked the guides profusely, then headed over to a food truck, parked on the south side of Grottoes’ town center. El Carreton offers fabulous north Mexican fare, from the unassuming vehicle. Enjoying half of the burrito especial, I savoured equally the serene emptiness of a town, whose residents were mostly at work elsewhere.
The Ghost of George WashingtonReflecting PoolEnd of the Line
Down through the Spine of Virginia, and across Tennessee, I did not stop at my customary refuge. It was not a good time for a visit. So, positioning myself for tomorrow’s long-delayed exploration of Shiloh, I stopped for the night at this western anchor of I-840, the southern Nashville by-pass. Music City has much to draw me in, but this time is intended for other pursuits.
May 1, 2024, Goshen, IN- With those words, from the immortal gospel song, George, the Director of the Welcome Center at the Baha’i House of Worship, Wilmette, Illinois sent our spirits soaring. What a glorious morning it had already been, on as afternoon progressed, I was delighted to join the the celebration of the Twelfth Day of Ridvan, commemorating the day, in 1863m when Baha’u’llah and His entourage left the Garden of Ridvan, outside Baghdad, and began the long journey to what is now Istanbul.
I was a bit under-dressed for this occasion, yet the message on my tee was proper: “Created noble”. We all are, don’t you know. I was honoured to be able to convey gratitude to George, after the ceremony, as refreshments were served in Foundation Hall, under the glorious auditorium, where prayers are said aloud on special occasions, such as this, but are mostly offered in silence, by members of all Faiths- and positive thoughts by those of no Faith. I was delighted as well to meet, in person, the distinguished long-time Choral Director of the House, Van Gilmer, whose music has enkindled so many of our spirits, over the past five decades.
This is a phone camera-only journey, my digital camera being given a rest, in advance of a heavy schedule, the rest of this year. So, here are a few scenes of the “Mother Temple of the West”, as ‘Abdu’l-Baha described it, accompanied by scenes of Wilmette’s majestic Gillson Park, which neighbours the House grounds, and of beloved Lake Michigan.
Baha’i House of Worship, Wilmette, IL
Lilacs in bloom, west garden of the Baha’i House of Worship, Wilmette, IL
Wallace Bowl, the amphitheater of Gillson Parl, Wilmette
Lake Michigan, from Gillson Park.
The Baha’i House of Worship, from Wilmette Harbor
So proceeded a glorious day. I felt a bit of disconnect, between my physical state and consciousness- though thankfully not quite on the order described by the author. Salman Rushdie, following his having been attacked by a young man during a ceremony he was attending, a few years back. I felt, all day, as if I was moving in a different realm, while being fully aware of, and connected with, those around me.
Nonetheless, I was able to render some service, during the visit, to guests who were at the Temple for the first time, and to convey thanks and appreciation to George and Van, for the excellent program. After leaving the sacred site, I found traffic along I-94 southbound, relatively light. It took about 45 minutes to get from the Dempster turnoff to the Ohio Street exit. After the I-55 interchange, things lightened up even more and there was virtually no one using the Skyway.
It was a tired, but happy, Schroeder family who greeted me for a short dinner respite and some catching up, from my last visit. Things were bustling and chaotic, for Val and Sparky, so I did not stay long, once dinner was done. I was also dragging a bit, by then, so the choice was made to settle into the Super 8, in this fine community, about an hour southeast of Mishawaka. Other friends here are also indisposed, so it will be on to Ohio and Pennsylvania, tomorrow afternoon. I am sorry to have to pass up Indianapolis this time, as well, yet it is critical to be where Mom is, by Saturday.
Let’s close, for now, with this rendition of “When The Stars Begin to Fall”, by the ’60s inspirational group, The Seekers.
