Tag Archives: proactivity

The Road to Diamond, Day 348: Winterized

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

November 10, 2025- I was thirty-five minutes out from Bellemont, when I got the message that the plumber was “on his way”. Knowing that two other people were already on site, I continued on towards the property. Once on the access road, I spotted the plumber’s truck and one other car ahead of me. Plumber turned onto a neighbouring development, so I followed the second car to Bellemont and four of us waited for the plumber to get his bearings.

The winterization process, for a property that will see minimal use during the off-season, involves draining the water tanks, pipes and hoses. Plumber had to “blow out” the tanks and pipes, to prevent against freezing that would lead to rupture. This property is in an area that gets more snow than even Flagstaff, a scant fifteen miles to the east, so no precaution is too extreme.

I will need to “winterize” my friendships with people in Home Base I, and in the Philippines, given that my life plans have changed. Immediate family has to come first, so whatever is necessary to avoid rupture, by way of transparency and honest, direct interest in what is going on in friends’ lives will have to suffice-until the day when I can spend time with them again. Making the most of remaining time here, and possibly going to “the Phils”, between the time of my grandchild’s birth and the day that I am needed permanently in Texas, will alleviate things somewhat.

The pipes do not have to break.

The Road to Diamond, Day 214: Proactive

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Family, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 30,2025- A year ago, I was sitting aside the woman who gave me life, as she took her last breath. The moment was a bookend. She had worked very hard to make sure that I survived a rough birth, and that I overcame many obstacles, some self-imposed, in order to at least enjoy a long and fairly well-lived life. Her overriding instructions were “Don’t take yourself too seriously” and “Stay ahead of the game”. Mom’s approval mattered far more than either of us sometimes realized, and the struggles I had with self and others, over the year, largely were brought to a close when I reverted to what she had tried to instill, so often and so selflessly, over the decades.

I can never think of a time when her rejoinder “Poor baby” was callous or misplaced. A child of the Depression, who lost her father to cancer in its midst, and saw her four oldest brothers off to war, in the 1940s, and her younger brother as well, in the Korean conflict, was nonetheless shaken when I headed off to VietNam, for what was a mercifully non-troubling ten months of rear echelon duty. She was a paragon of persistence.

In a generally love-filled marriage, that lasted 37 years, she would often find herself facing her fears about her youngest son, alone. It took some constant communication to get her loved ones to understand just how much she wanted for the little boy, who became a disabled man. We each grew into compassionate adults, who would ourselves fight for the well-being of the least among us-and who would give anything for our children and, in my siblings’ cases, grandchildren. I know the latter now, anticipating a grandchild’s birth with a heart that is bursting with love.

Mom is now with so many of the souls she loved, and is looking out for the rest of us. I can count several times, in the past year, when there has been that one extra push to get me over the threshold. It has made some rather tall orders shrink down to hurdle level.

I only hope I have continued to make her proud. God knows, a reciprocal pride has welled in me, for as long as I can remember.

The Road to Diamond, Day199: Fatherhood at 37

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, Education, Family, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

June 15, 2025- In less than a month, Aram will be the same age that I was when he was born. There is a significance to this, which I cannot as yet divulge, but it is quite prescient. That age seems to be a call to maturity, in a very practical way. Aram has entered the field for which he has prepared, and is off to a good start. I rose to a solid position,in South Korea, around the time of his birth, and would have remained, but for family complications here in the U.S. I landed on my feet, once back here, but that is another story.

I was decidedly a late bloomer. My son does not have to be. He has long been recognized for leadership skills and has a solid work ethic. He is more grounded than I was, at that age. A number of mentors, both familial and professional, have helped in that regard. He is wise enough to seek our collective counsel, and to listen to the best of the advice given. I am confident in his future.

In our society that is at once aloof and indulgent, the skills that a person needs to succeed require a lot of self-discipline, of proactivity. There is a need for flexibility and for being able to find resources that make up for what government and industry may not offer, in the way of doing one’s job. Being able to see beyond make-work tasks, some of which are designed to salve the egos of higher-ups, is crucial. The superfluous still needs to get done, but even the most self-absorbed of corporate or public officials will appreciate a self-starter on their staff. One can always grouse, afterward, but the tasks will not go away on their own.

Fatherhood has some of the same aspects. One cannot argue, successfully with a toddler, or to a lesser extent, with a teenager. The hard work still needs to get done, though, and chances are the finished product will be a solid member of society, if the father (along with the mother) does not back away from core principles. As with teaching, the reward may not be seen until later, but the wait is worth it.

These are my thoughts, as my son actively considers becoming a father, in his own right.

The Road to Diamond, Day 155: Ahead of Self

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

May 2, 2025- The proactive young lady cleaned the empty table and put the glasses on the counter, next to where I was sitting at the bar. I thought nothing of it, until another patron asked “Who took my wine?” I showed him the 1/4 full goblet and water glass, which he gratefully took back and finished imbibing. Nothing further was said, on the floor. I am sure the server/busser was gently admonished by the floor manager, but there was no embarrassment involved.

We all have probably gotten ahead of self, at one time or another. Ambition, pressure to produce-or to perform, the drive to out do the competition or just an overactive work ethic can lead to the cart racing past the horse. We have seen how this has worked, variously to the advantage, or more frequently to the detriment, of large corporations, government agencies or hybrids of the two (like DOGE).

It starts, though, with the individual. How one learns from overkill largely determines the longevity of a career or the implosion of same. One can be a quick study and avoid the pitfalls of hyper-ambition and a false sense of superiority. One can also be a stubborn, arrogant fool, succeeding for a while, but then letting self-concept be the cart that flies past its draft animal, careening in the wrong direction. In the latter instance, the fool can sometimes recover, with the passage of time and a use being found for his/her skills allowing for a second chance-or even a third.

It all depends on how open a person is to learning from mistakes.

The Road to Diamond, Day 149: A Slight Mismatch

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Social, Spiritual, Striving

April 26, 2025- Four of us gave a concerted effort, in trying to put a tent inside a bag, at the end of the school district fundraiser. Realizing that the bag was too small, we found the equipment manager, who remembered how easy it was to put a smaller tent into another bag, earlier in the day. Mismatch!! Two of us took the smaller tent out and put the larger tent in the big bag. Then came small tent reunited with small bag.

Many of us go through mismatches in life-usually, as with the tents, a combination of feeling hurried, thinking there is no alternative and thinking “I know I can make this work!” So, jobs don’t get done quite as well as they might; relationships founder and end up either broken or stale; programs are left to grow sclerotic and useless. A handy equipment manager can’t always come to the rescue.

So, it becomes a matter of proactivity. Plan, one must; plan, we must. As I consider what lies ahead, calling on those who are on my team-for Baha’i community activities, for Red Cross events and responses to emergencies; for get-togethers during my time back East, seeking rightness of fit is a big item. It has been a fairly good run, these past several years, with few mismatches. Much of that was from what I learned in marriage-“Consultation is finding out”, was Penny’s mantra. It still serves me well.

The Road to Diamond, Day 84: Mixed Messages

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Posted by on in collaborating, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 20, 2025- On the one hand, Doc says that I have the constitution of a 45-year-old. I’ll take that for as long as I can keep it. On the other hand, my skin needs a few tweaks. I will go through the process of getting those treated, though thankfully, I don’t have anywhere near the horror blotches of the 2010s. Just a few small bumps is all.

We all go through the day and get some mixed messages. I got a few during my recent time in the Philippines. Now, though, I am getting much more clarity from my friend. We are still messaging back and forth-and the messages are straightforward, both ways. As with friends here in North America, our communication is honest, caring-and yes, loving. I feel blessed that everyone on my radar screen has my best interests at heart, and I, theirs.

Mixed messages come about when the messenger is not sure of self, let alone about feelings towards the recipient. There is, more essentially therefore, a primary duty to not send mixed messages to oneself. I have had to face this as often as anyone-wanting things that aren’t there, in an imperfect, phenomenal world. The solution to the latter is to get to work, and so I have.

Coming full circle, maybe this is the reason for my clean bill of general health. Proactivity reflects one’s work ethic.

The Red Cross, Re-imagined

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, service, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 26, 2024- After Hurricane Harvey, the Red Cross came under fire, from certain right-wing elements, for what was see as a lackluster response to the storm, in parts of coastal Texas. The criticism stung, certainly, especially for those of us who have done our level best, on the front lines of more than one widespread disaster. Leadership went back to the drawing board, nonetheless, and sifted through the accusations leveled at the organization. The focus was on doing better-much better. One thing was clear, though: The thinly-veiled expectation, that charitable organizations should just fold up their tents and let people struggle on their own, was not going to carry the day.

Those who had been operating as islands unto themselves listened with rapt attention, as a vision of the American Red Cross expanding its partnerships with local communities, local and state governments, faith communities and above all, other charitable organizations, was laid out, at a regional planning conference, this morning and afternoon. The various focus branches of the Red Cross will now be working more in concert with one another, something that those who help in several capacities have wanted to see for quite some time.

It’s long been known that organizations of any kind operate more efficiently when the various entities within talk to one another-and, more importantly, listen to each other’s ideas, regard the other’s problems as their own and develop an unshakable bond. Further, proactivity is vital to any person or organization that claims to offer solutions to the multiple problems arising, often in areas that have historically not seen much difficulty. Reactivity, playing whack-a-mole, has lost its efficacy; so, too, has denial.

The collective Red Cross mindset will focus on community mobilization; a strength-based, rather than need-based, approach; establishing itself in a community as a long-term presence, not “in and out”. Presence is seen as the mission. Transaction will be directed towards transformation. Training will be simplified, looking towards readiness and capacity-building, especially in the face of an increase in the number of disasters that leave billions of dollars in damages. The program will include language diversity, more volunteer town halls, regional stand-ups, bi-annual community briefings, and staff retreats. Public service announcements and billboarding will be more widespread, and no group will be left out of the loop.

These points appeal to me, as a member of the Baha’i Faith, because of that organization’s focus on inclusivity, proactivity and a responsibly progressive approach to facing social and environmental ills. I look forward to being an agent for bringing the two organizations, and many others, together, as a testament to the notion: “The true leader serves. Serves people”- Robert Habecker, “Servant Leadership”. The true servant works to unite.

Lesson Nine

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 27, 2022- Seemingly everywhere, and handling five tasks at once-one for each finger of her hand-so to speak, the head barista caught me signaling out of the corner of her eye, saw the half- sandwich on my plate and went in the back for a take-out box. She then swept back into the ellipse, and put the box down in front of me, while directing her attention to the couple next to me, who were initially enjoying expensive drinks, but had decided they wanted what I had to eat. ‘E’ had been at work since 11 a.m. and it was now 6:30. Her boss, the restaurant manager, and her assistant barista, a slightly younger woman, were doing the best they could to keep up-but ‘E’ is a force of nature. Petite, brainy, proactive, highly energetic and absolutely gorgeous, she can name her ticket-and I would venture that by time she is 25, she will be her own boss.

”E’ is, inadvertently, one of my life teachers. The lesson she has imparted, seared into my consciousness, is to reiterate that a strong woman, a strong human, needs no initial help from anyone, in reaching for the stars. The ladder is something she will devise herself, as is the team she is building and will continue to build. I have seen, and known, several people like her, over the years. Some have imploded, due to a latent inflexibility in the face of misfortune. Others have gone on and hit the heights. Time will tell into which category ‘E’ falls-but she is both gregarious and stone-faced practical, by turns. I sense she will face whatever comes along, with aplomb.

This is the ninth life lesson, along with several sub-lessons, that living on Earth has brought. The others:

  1. I am part of a family and cannot exist just for myself.
  2. Deciding to just up and walk away from home has its consequences.
  3. It is one thing to have an unusual personality and quite another to use it as an excuse.
  4. Self-loathing is a false modus vivendi. God created no junk.
  5. All the crap I absorbed in my community about People of Colour, and about women, is just that-BS.
  6. No matter how bad a situation is, walking through it will lead to greater strength and a place of peace.
  7. Every person on Earth has a place of truth in the heart. If someone hides their truth, it is on them.
  8. There is but one race: The human race.
  9. Every person on the planet, regardless of age, is capable of wondrous things-even singly and alone.

So often, just watching how people handle their lives is an object lesson in how I might deal with challenges in mine. I am grateful for all the people who have imparted life lessons.

When Darkness Descends

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Posted by on in Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

May 31, 2020–

I will say this, today was a balanced day, in terms of how I interacted with others. Breakfast was served by a nice young lady, and was well-prepared and delicious. I was taken aback, though, by the surliness of her boss-who took exception to the t-shirt I was wearing. Not sure whether the death stare was due to it being a t-shirt,or to the message it stated: “No Room in My Heart for Prejudice”. There is also the matter of my being a single man, sitting at a table meant for four, but I displaced no one. (Prescott restaurants, as I’ve mentioned before, are not always welcoming to parties of one.)

I went back to the house, and had a well-attended online devotional, though a couple of the participants got a bit testy, when I described my earlier experience. I am seen by some around here as being a bit too pushy, when it comes to talking about my beliefs. That is something I can abide, as I rarely even broach those beliefs, unless I sense a receptive audience.

I had good conversations with the others, though, thus balancing out the morning. In the afternoon, a very good friend and I discussed a couple of enterprises that she is considering. This is a most proactive response to the harrowing events that have hit our country, thus far this year.

The day came to a pleasant end, at least for me, with a two-hour instructional on bridging cultural differences. Lord knows, this applies as much to life within the United States, as it does further afield.

May has been a rough row to hoe, but we’re getting….somewhere.

Losing Love

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Posted by on in children, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

December 15, 2019-

A couple of things reminded me of the line in Paul Simon’s song, “Graceland”:                    “My traveling companion is nine years old. She said she’s losing love.”

I received several frantic messages, this morning, from someone who feared a family member was messing with him.  The more direct thing, that reminded me of the song, was a paraphrase of that line, in another friend’s online post.

In the first case above, it’s unlikely that the person is living without love.  It’s more a difference in communication styles.  In the second case, the child is very much loved, by two generations of family.

It is terrifying to lose love, especially for a child.  I know people who have themselves never known at least one of their parents.  Some have gone on and made great examples of themselves, with or without the love of the remaining parent.  Others have not thrived, and have grown, physically, while remaining emotionally stunted and listless.

In my case, I was never without love, from the time I was born until the day I left home to make my way in life.  The times since, that I felt I’d lost love, were figments of my imagination and were more a deficit, on my part , of reflecting love.  I’ve since learned how to be consistent, in that regard.  God’s grace  always mirrors itself in those who love us.

These thoughts just came into my mind, as I get ready for the last big event before Christmas.