August 11, 2023- On this date, in 2011, I posted a short, tentative introductory post, inaugurating this site. It was at a difficult time in life. My wife of twenty-nine years had been gone five months. I was feeling isolated from many people, and was feeling pressured by others, to do what they thought was best for me, going forward. I ended up “going dark”, for the most part, until the following January.
A dozen years later, I’m still very much here, and no longer feeling besieged, either by my own demons or by others’ expectations. So, I want to take a look back, at some of the things that I did right, during each of these years.
2011- It was an honour to help my in-laws, providing food for them, over a two-week period, when they were laid up and unable to prepare their own meals. I also re-connected with my father’s older brother, in Colorado.
2012- Some of the places that Penny and I had wanted to visit together, I was able to reach-with her spirit very close at hand: San Francisco’s Baha’i Center; the Redwoods, both coastal and interior; the Oregon Coast; the Portland Rose Gardens; Neah Bay and Cape Flattery, WA; Seattle.
2013- I was able to attend a “Sail Blind” event, in which my second-eldest brother was participating.
2014- Attended the 70th Anniversary of D-Day observance, at Utah Beach, and visited the site of my father-in-law’s World War II imprisonment,in Berga, Germany- both in his memory.
2015- Made it to southeast Alaska, which we had also hoped to visit as a couple.
2016- Overcame a lot of self-doubt and took on a job that involved helping other autistic people. With considerable help, replaced the broken-down vehicle that I had bought on the cheap, two years ago.
2017- Kept at my final full time job; had a smooth drive, to and from New England.
2018- Faced down a very powerful negative force.
2019- Survived a physical attack; made the decision to move into semi-retirement. Went to Korea and attended Aram’s and Yunhee’s wedding.
2020- Worked the floor, twice, during the height of COVID-19, at Red Cross storm shelters, in Louisiana and Texas.
2021- Drove to and from Massachusetts, twice, to assist with Mom’s move and the clearing of our former family home.
2022- Traveled to Newfoundland and Cape Breton, fulfilling another of our couple dreams. Bought a vehicle on my own, this time in a proper manner.
2023- Made a concerted effort to reduce my weight-and succeeded. Visited a few friends,in the Pacific Northwest, who had felt isolated during the long night of COVID-19. There are two long journeys, at least, left in this year. I say “at least”, because there is no telling what will be asked of any of us, by the Red Cross-with regard to Maui.
In any event, my psyche is in so much better a place, after twelve years of self-responsibility.