Category Archives: Assistance

(In)tractible-Part I

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 12, 2021-

So much of what remains to be resolved, in our world, seems insoluble. People speak of being depressed, mired in anger or even bored by “same old” requests and demands from others, day-to-day. Many of the same headlines get pushed, in the news cycle.

Allow me to post an observation: In reading just two friends’ posts on another social media site, this afternoon, I saw people about whom I care deeply, with one foot in the a land of compassion and justice, and the other in a place of suspicion and the denial of humanity towards people of a different point of view.

It is, simply put, this dichotomy, this lack of inward and outward unity, that keeps the individual, and thus the community, from addressing what truly matters. Unless and until we can truly, of our own choosing, put our eggs in the basket of the Oneness of Mankind, the same problems WILL continue to pop up, and put a damper on our days.

I am keeping this post, and its companion post on Sunday, short and succinct. In that post, the focus will be on two continually vexing issues, of which some of my fellows in Faith are aware, but about which they choose to complain, wishing the matters would just disappear. As my late wife said, “Standing at the foot of the mountain doesn’t put you at the top.”

Styles

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

February 10, 2021-

Each of us has styles,in one or more areas of life, that are unique to us as individuals.

I spent some time, during the course of this truncated school day, quietly watching my young charge investigate his world, his way. He is a tactile learner, and so was occupied for a short while in distinguishing the difference in texture, pattern and hardness of various wood and metal surfaces. He tries out different intonations, to see how they feel in his throat and mouth. Although his language is limited, he knows that he can experiment, within bounds, and is in a place where people care.

I pondered some of my own styles- I also sometimes engage in tactile learning, but more often will act after observing my environment and considering what is best for those around me.

After finishing my dinner, at a local bakery-restaurant, I throw away my napkins and drink cup. The dishes remain on the table, so that the busser may know to sanitize it. I don’t, however, want to have the staff deal directly with anything that has touched my mouth and hands. It’s a residue of all the years of wanting to spare my young charges from unnecessary bother, while respecting their doing what is needed, in order to be successful.

In organizing my day, allowing extra time for showering, grooming and easing into my day-with the newspaper and a cup of coffee, breakfast and devotions- before setting out on the day’s events, whether work, community life or a day spent in nature, creates the air of assurance and calm that allows for dealing with even the most unanticipated of events.

Styles of learning, public communication and activity may be hard to synchronize, but there is nothing that says we cannot make the effort-which starts with observing the way others do things, and thinking of the ways in which they are similar to our own methods.

I am getting better at all of this, and of tying one day’s activities into an even flow with the next day.

Dereliction

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

February 6, 2021-

There are many people still in my life, and several causes that seek attention. I gather that this is true of just about everyone. The question then arises: Is there a point at which being oneself and prioritizing one cause, or group of people, over another constitutes dereliction of duty?

Being an empath, I feel other people’s energy very strongly. That doesn’t explain the underlying reasons for that energy. Only the person feeling it can divulge those. I feel it even more so, when the energy is collective. So, to all those who have expressed the view that a person ought commit to one organization, activity or community, I say godspeed. I will help each organization as alignment allows. My own energy focus allows for a modicum of time spent in virtual meetings- knowing that, as with any human endeavour, there are those who would be on Zoom, or Microsoft Teams, 24/7-and again, godspeed to them. My greater energy, though, is spent away from the computer.

For the time being, that is, for the next two weeks, my priority is helping a couple of schools in dealing with COVID-related staff shortages. Some time will be spent on Red Cross classes, and with a small, but spirited, group of college students who are earnestly planning sustainability activities. There is also the 50% chance that jury duty will transpire, towards the end of this month.

Dereliction of duty is clearly defined, when it comes to parenting, supervision of children in a school setting or service in the public realm. It is less clear, when it comes to the matters of those generally self-sustaining adults who are suffering emotionally or spiritually. This gray area is also on my mind and in my heart, and occupies some of my time, on a case by case basis. Thankfully, most such people are appreciative of any time and energy that others give, as it at least validates that their situation is important to someone.

Unprogrammed

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 3, 2021-

Stories are surfacing, of people wanting to “deprogram” others. The whole premise seems to be to bring the other people to their senses; in other words, to get them to drop what are seen as fanciful attitudes and opinions, which the “deprogrammer” wants to replace with attitudes and opinions that a) are not threatening to him/her and b) are more in tune with the mainstream.

There are several varieties of deprogramming. Perhaps the best known is “conversion therapy”, the aim of which is to convince a Gay or Lesbian person to change their orientation, to heterosexuality. There is considerable risk, in such an effort- as the primary mode seems to be psychological and fairly short tem in focus. The flip side of this is, of course, the relatively rare attempts by Gay or Lesbian people to introduce heterosexuals to a homosexual orientation. Neither is going to work, to any great degree, as there are aspects of sexual orientation that go far beyond physical attraction, or even psychological programming.

There is Stockholm Syndrome, in which the victim of a crime comes to identify with the perpetrator(s) and adopts their attitudes, behaviours and mindsets- often engaging in similar behaviour to an even greater degree than the original criminals. This phenomenon far predates the incident for which it was named-as witness the Roman slaves who, once freed, became masters of other slaves. Human nature does as it will.

Getting back to the present-the whole programming, deprogramming, reprogramming thing is, as far as I can see, more about the person trying to effect the change than about the person whom he/she is trying to change. It is, arguably, doomed to failure. The only path to disabusing a person of thoughts and behaviours which are clearly harmful is surrounding them with unconditional love, a course of action which takes considerable time, energy and patience-and which avoids guilt, shame and the projection that one is in any way superior to the other person.

The only real change is that which is effected from within.

Aiming Carefully

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Posted by on in Assistance, Community, Personal Values, Spiritual

January 31, 2021-

There will always be those who look to find fault with anyone who doesn’t toe their idea of the Party Line. The problem I have with that mindset is that such a sense of purism, combined with ego, leads to corrupt behaviour, at some point. It starts off as a nickel here, a dime there, a rock in the shoe ignored, a come-on excused, or treated as an offer that just could not be refused. The appeal to power grows, and the ideal of service to the People shrinks.

This is where onlookers start to get the idea that the Dirty Dozen, Horrible Hundred or Tawdry Thousand, are really a cabal. Those who are never called to account for their deeds begin to seem invincible to their critics, so it stands to reason they must have a force of deep-pocketed, well-connected guardians behind them. This is especially so, when years go by and none of a person’s real or perceived wrongdoings are ever verified in a Court of Law.

From where I see things, though, there is an additional roadblock to justice: Too often, the lodging of complaints, against a political opponent or even a benign rival, is delivered in scattershot fashion. The notion of throwing something at the wall, and seeing what sticks, is its own, oblique reward.

There is a definite legal principle at work here: Be concise; be succinct; be on target. I want, as much as anyone, to see justice served. Especially with regard to crimes against humanity, crimes against children: Bring what evidence there is to be brought and be not careless with that evidence. These are the days when all that is hidden in darkness shall be brought to light. It is imperative, however, that there is no artifice involved.

Be not cowed by anyone’s present status or public record of achievement-and do be true to what is real.

One Spirit

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Posted by on in animal and plant life, Assistance, collaborating, Historical, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

January 30, 2021-

I have an independent mind, the expression of which has left several people around here, and elsewhere, who I fairly trusted, responding with “LOL”, or with sullen silence. The thing that I find funny is that several of them pride themselves on being people of faith. The belief that there is One God, Who created all life, is as central to their pronounced faith, as it is to mine.

So, it is incredulous to me that people can even distinguish between human beings, as to who deserves to live. It befuddles me, that there are at least two classes of people, and this distinction is a point of pride, a cornerstone of belief.

There is, by my reckoning, One Creator, One Spirit, One Universe, One Planet Earth and One Human Race. I have differences of opinion with many, AND that does not diminish their humanity-as far as I am concerned. For saying this, however, I have lost several friends, at least one extended family member and a few members of my own Faith, for not adhering to an orthodoxy that claims to be fighting for freedom-but is rooted in fear.

Let’s look at a few matters, more closely:

  1. Human Rights- I hear the First National Youth Poet Laureate say that the mind of a child is paramount. This same person also says that medical professionals should be allowed to put unborn children to death. What happens to the mind of a child who is not even allowed to be born? I hear some of the same people who espouse abortion, as a routine practice, voice opposition to the Death Penalty, even for the most heinous of murders.
  2. Nationalism- I see and hear people of various backgrounds, some with medical degrees and some with law degrees, saying that America should be a White, Christian nation-exclusively. What, exactly, is a White Nation? The continent of Europe, alone, is home to seventy different ethnicities. Jesus loved people of all the known nations of His time-and loves everyone, the world over, now. The first Christians, outside of a smattering of Jews in the Holy Land and a handful of Greeks, were Ethiopians, South Asians and Turkic people in Central Asia. The majority of Christians today are People of Colour.
  3. Wealth- Yesterday, a wealthy investor took to social media to furiously denounce those who have actively engaged in buying inexpensive stocks, offered by companies which produce goods and services in which they have a common interest. His basic point was that there was a move to destroy our economic system. That this participation will actually strengthen the nation’s economy, in the long run, is willfully ignored by those who favour keeping things as they historically have been. There is no club. There is no exclusive society that deserves preference over all other human beings. The very use of the prefix “non-“, with reference to people outside one’s own circle, is odious and needs to be discarded. The selectivity which is promoted by so many leaders of groups may be temporarily necessary, in terms of how each of us structures our time, our attention and our energy-but for it to be a permanent psychological, emotional and legal barrier to seeing the humanity in everyone and the sentience of all beings, is treacherous to those whose rights are debarred- and to one’s own humanity. The concept of any human being superior to the next, even by dint of the preponderance of one’s demonstrated character, is in the long run, an abomination. We are each here to grow, to learn and to become one. There is, in the entire Universe, one Creator and one Spirit animating all life. All distinction is a matter of mental construct. All prejudice and hatred are little more than byproducts of unfaced fear.

Keeping the Fire

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

January 29, 2021- One of the things about the pandemic is that those of us who are officially retired from work are still needed in our professions. This is the sort of thing which happens, especially to nurses and physicians, but also to teachers, EMTs and a variety of people in supporting roles. So, I have gone in, to cover for those sidelined by COVID-19, those who have pandemic-related medical appointments and a few other situations.

One of the features of working with children, in the present environment particularly, is what I see as the need to encourage young people to stand their ground, to speak their truth clearly and not be cowed by any attempts, by ANYONE, to intimidate them into letting go of what they know is deserved. This does not mean that a child should be taught to act in an unbridled and irresponsible manner.

When a person, of any age, does speak the truth to a situation, it is the mark of authenticity, for anyone who hears that truth, to have the speaker’s back. In this school, particularly, those who have stood up and insisted, properly, that matters be handled a certain way have been my greatest allies and have made all the difference between the good days I have had and days that might have gone off the rails.

Even in the rough-edged years, of the 2000s, I still recall those forthright children whose outspoken and compassionate manners bridged the gap between my shakiness and being able to pull things together , not wasting the class’s time. With all to which this generation of students is being asked to endure, that forthrightness, that fortitude that flame, needs to be enkindled more than ever before.

I remain on call, for this, and other acts of community service.

Never Doomed

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social

January 27, 2021-

It never fails that, after a day of struggle, there is a burst of communal energy and much is accomplished. So it was today, that my quad mates joined in the shoveling effort, and we got the driveway cleared in less than an hour. I will need to do a bit more, tomorrow, in order to get the car turned around, without backing clear down to the street, but that will be a small project.

It takes a lot of positive energy, and sometimes, extreme patience-but I have never felt the need to reduce myself to a puddle of doom and gloom. Life is never perfect, yet whether it is due to age or to a simple realization that what is meant to work out, will, I have found myself increasingly calm in the midst of whatever storms-literal and figurative- have come this way.

There has been a solution to all that I have encountered, over the past ten years, and whether it is an answer I have devised myself or an insight from those around me, is inconsequential. The problem is resolved, the learning has taken place and life continues much the better.

Old habits are sometimes set aside, in light of novel situations. So, instead of celebrating the passing of the storm and the return of beautiful weather-if only for a short time-by heading downtown to a restaurant, I walked two blocks to the meat market and got the fixings for a meatball and past meal, which worked just fine.

There is always a common sense solution.

“It Can’t Happen Here”

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Personal Values, Social, Striving

January 17, 2021-

In the turbulence of the late 1960s, people in cities like New Haven, CT, Seattle, Minneapolis and San Diego could be heard saying, with regard to racial unrest, “It can’t happen here.” The notion was that because there were leading segments of the community which were liberal and practiced a measure of enlightenment, that the city would be free of strife. Nonetheless, violence did occur in each of those cities, in the 1960s-as well as last year, when Minneapolis found itself answering for homegrown practices of race-based imbalance.

There is a flip side of this, which a balanced society would do well to heed. Those who follow a philosophy of social traditionalism, religious fundamentalism and individualism have found themselves, thanks in large part to the excesses of January 6, as somewhat on the outs with a broad segment of American society.

They must not remain ostracized in perpetuity. Those who merely express a longing for things as they once were, without advocating violent overthrow of our government, are likely to accept changes which they can understand, and which don’t feed their worst fears. I am seeing friends, with whom I have profound philosophical differences, finally taking the stance of “wait and see”, with regard to the next administration.

One of the alternatives would see reasonable people pushed into a corner-and like the people of colour who were pushed, consistently, beyond their limits, those who see their points of view denigrated and their very being constantly castigated would, in due time, lash out in far more deadly ways than we saw on January 6.

I have held the same view, regarding people of colour, since I was a child. If God didn’t want diversity among human beings, He’d have made us all uniform. So, in order for “it” to not keep happening, social strife coming from “parting on the right”, then, yes, enforce justice towards those who both fomented and carried out the violence of Epiphany Day, and any other violence that may happen this week. Otherwise, let’s listen, reassure and counsel patience, with those expressing fear that the rest of us regard as unfounded. Let us encourage giving the new President a chance-as many of us did with those angry at the results of the election of 2016-and at every election since 2000.

It must not happen here- again.

United and Independent

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

January 16, 2021-

Today, my focus has been on two things: Sharing things I no longer need and attending to the unity of all life. I am presently reading Amalia Camateros’ “Spirit of the Stones”, an account of her life that focuses on her growth as an embodied soul and deep connection with the elements of Earth: Air, water, mineral and fire. Amalia is a native of Australia, whose primary connection with North America has been with Sedona, our sister city to the northeast.

In one chapter, she relates her most intense visit to Cathedral Rock, perhaps the most energy-laden of the Sedona area’s many vortices. She describes the promontory as appearing to be two souls, standing back to back-united and independent. The standing rocks are often described by those who have spent time on Cathedral Rock as representing a man and a woman- married, but also each their own person.

That set me to thinking: I was in such a marriage, and when one of us needed the other most, we were inseparable. No pun intended, we were one another’s rock. I am seeing more married adults, among my circle of friends, celebrating their spouses. This is a reverse of what I used to see, from the ’90s into the 2010s, though I know many will reply: “I’ve always been in love with my spouse.” There was more bickering, not so many years ago, and I sense that, with life hard enough as it is, people are realizing what matters most in life.

There is also a rise in the understanding that each human being is a unique soul and that there is no ownership of one by another. Even the use of “my”, in reference to a spouse, or even a child, is fading. Not that many years ago, I was taken to task for using the term “my wife”. The critic was right, though not for the reason he gave (“Only a misogynist would claim to own a woman”). No one owns anyone else, period. It has nothing to do with a person’s psychosexual baggage. Words do matter, though, and when rererring to one’s beloved, children or family members, it’s become my wont to use given names-as well as relationships- end of digression.

Getting back to the blend of unity and independence, the other revelation that came today was with regard to the process of global unity. It must come from the ground up. No downwardly imposed world order will last long. As a community is only as strong as its families, so a planetary order will depend on strong individual nations, each committed to work with the others. This will largely depend, at least initially, on the human race taking the wisdom of the ancients and blending it with the native adaptability of children, in solving novel problems. (I saw this ability, this past week, with a new focus).

The days and months ahead will likely see a clash, of sorts, between those who favour the present, conventional ways of doing things and those who favour such a blend of knowledge, as is described above. There is, though, a new energy taking root.