Category Archives: children

Dance of Ten Crayons

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Community, Family, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 29, 2023- The little boy held five crayons in each hand, carefully divided between primary and secondary colours. He sang a song of his own composing, in a rudimentary form of English, the words’ meanings known only to himself. The melody, though, was pleasant and his whirling dance juxtaposed nicely with the song. This occupied him for almost forty minutes.

Creativity is a bounteous thing, and we can learn more ways in which it may be applied, by almost anyone-regardless of their intellect or state of mind. With regard to the former, my youngest brother, with limited speaking ability, nonetheless would raise a cup of juice and call out “Achtung!”, wanting those at table to join him in a toast. (He got this from watching episodes of the TV show “Hogan’s Heroes” It sounded to him like something that would be a nice cue for a toast.) Mentally challenged people are among the most loving and generous of all humans. With regard to the latter, mankind has shown both a limitless capacity for generosity and inclusivity; on the other hand, whole museums have been devoted to the Holocaust of World War II and there are Museums of Torture in a good many cities across Europe, as well as in Chicago.

Among the items in my own wardrobe is a cap that features a wraparound shield, covering the sides of my face, my ears and neck. Of course, some find it amusing, but I am pleased with what it does for my dermatological health. Whoever designed this cap has done fair-skinned (and a goodly number of swarthy people) a huge favour, in this time of approaching Solar Maximum.

We will each have moments when we may be called upon to devise a novel solution to a problem, large or small. Let it then be a time when one’s own dance of ten crayons comes to fruition. May that dance be a peaceful, regenerative one.

Style and Substance

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 25, 2023- The little boy greeted me, in late morning, with a warm hug. The angry woman, later in the evening, with much the opposite.

Like so many days, this one began light and airy-and ended with a thud. I woke, sensing that the energy around me was shifting in a positive direction and that, in advance of the journey that begins at the end of next week, my path in what remains to be done here in the meantime would be free of obstacles. The work day reflected that, with the children energetic and cooperative, and my colleagues just happy to see another Friday, though they do enjoy their work. Everyone likes a rest, or change of pace, after a week at a job well done.

I visited Rafter Eleven, and was treated like a king-an extra mocha java was delivered to my table, as a token of appreciation for consistent support of this marvelous enterprise, over the bottom of the past eight years. A little bee was also attracted to my light meal, and to the drink, eventually finding its way to the bottom of the glass. Unfortunately, the poor animal perished from the still icy condition of the vessel-or maybe from the caffeine.

After leaving my friend’s establishment, I chose to join an in-person meeting, instead of going back to Home Base and signing onto Zoom. The hosts and the presenter were congenial, and the information quite illuminating. Not everyone was glad to see me however, and after a fashion, I found it best to excuse myself and head out-easy enough to do, as it had been a long, if lovely, day up to that point-and I needed rest.

There have been, every so often, people in my life who do not take kindly to my manner of speech or style of explanation. I try to learn what I can from such a person, for a time, and if it makes me more well-rounded or expands my knowledge, so much the better. Style, however, tends to reflect the substance of a soul. An angry, wounded soul will be abrupt, castigating and intolerant. I have not done well, in the presence of such people and this evening was no exception.

For my part, I know that I do not think well on my feet at the end of the day-and frequently, I do not engage well in debate, even when rested. This means nothing to the disquiet person, and is often viewed by them as an excuse. The whole trigger this evening was my statement that I like to back up my comments with the words of Baha’u’llah or ‘Abdu’l-Baha, not as a proselytizing mechanism or as a substitute for good deeds, but as the glue that holds my own words and deeds together. That led to an outburst of anger, and I chose to leave, rather than exacerbate the situation.

For a time, once back in the apartment, I pondered whether this is an indication that my time here in this community is getting short, that maybe the bloom is off the rose and I need to move on. The counter to that, I know, is that the part of myself that triggers anger in disquiet people will only spark the same, at the next place, if I move along. It’s better to keep this Home Base for now, get my journeys done in September and October, and resume work here from November through mid-May.

With that, I am headed to sleep, and hope for a peaceful weekend.

On Quality

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

August 24, 2023- While working out on a stationary bicycle, this evening, I caught an episode of “Shark Tank”, a program in which would-be entrepreneurs approach Mark Cuban, and four other judges, and pitch a proposal, which is to garner the proponents a cash advance, for which, in return, the judges each get a percentage of ownership in the start-up.

Watching one of the pitches, in particular, I had to say, with Mark Cuban, who knows a thing or two about start-ups and expansion, that selling the initial unit of the business, for half of what was originally paid, and asking the “Tank” to fund three units of a nationwide expansion of the concept, was a non-starter. I say this, knowing next to nothing about business, yet having this idea in my head that, if I did have a start-up, based on an appealing concept and backed by a solid business model, I would want to have twice what I paid for the first unit, in the bank-before even thinking about a second unit, much less a third or fourth. I would want to have a track record of quality-and I would not sell off my initial unit. Had the entrepreneurs known the process of thinking things through, they’d have not made that mistake.

In a competitive world, quality is king. Not so long ago, if I had been offered a Marvel comic book persona, I would have been The Veneer. While I had, and still have, lots of heart, my understanding of what made for a quality offering was rather stilted. In teaching, and in making group presentations as a counselor, I was big on content-facts and figures. People- students, colleagues and interviewers-wanted depth, hooks, gravitas, a sense of what mattered.

Thank the Divine for the Internet: For Google, Bing, Safari, Siri and Alexa. Not feeling the need to be a walking encyclopedia is a fine thing. My focus, for the past decade or so, has been on encouraging thought, and showing how to ask the right questions. Quality of focus and of what will be important, fifty years from now, is essential in education, in business and in public discourse. Students need to be guided in that area, far more than they need to be passive recipients of things they could find on their own.

Independent investigation of truth is the wave of the future. Having learning be a quality experience mandates that that process be encouraged now.

An Eclectic Gathering

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Entertainment, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Striving, Travel

August 12, 2023, Lake Havasu City- The ebullient young man practically burst through the front door, carrying his crock pot full of macaroni with three cheeses-his contribution to the festive birthday gathering. I took a spoonful and can attest that it is among the best “mac and cheese” I’ve ever had, and told him so, which made his effusiveness that much keener.

I came to this city that exists almost in isolation from the rest of Arizona, with wilderness as its California neighbour, to attend a friend’s 31st birthday. Arriving at 6 p.m. made the most sense, given the two activities to which I needed to attend earlier, back in Prescott. It also made sense, temperature wise: Lake Havasu City sits squarely in the western sector of the Sonoran Desert, and temperatures here have hit close to 120 F-as recently as last month. It was 102, when I arrived at the party site, where I am also spending the night.

I knew only three people, the birthday celebrant and his father, who live at the party location, and a friend from Bullhead City, 1 1/2 hours north northwest of here, when I first arrived. I still would characterize most of the rest of the crowd as pleasant acquaintances, as I came to know very little about them, but this does rank among the most convivial of gatherings, in recent memory. The conversations ranged from Lahaina- on nearly everyone’s mind, these days, to a guest’s unusual medical condition and another guest’s recent loss of a loved one. The common thread, though, was the deep concern people have for one another. No one who expressed a personal issue or health concern had it glossed over, by the group.

Here were several workers from the local hospice, stay-at-home mothers, teachers, gym attendants, an architect, two high school students, a retired surfer, a deep sea fisherman (also retired, given the fact that the water here is in a fresh-water lake, and it’s a long way to his former haunts in Sitka, AK) and a couple of ten-year old boys, who were mostly focused on the video game that was on the wide screen in front of them. The high schoolers were the mac and cheese chef and his girlfriend, who served delectable soft chocolate chip cookies. “She’s a fabulous baker!”, boyfriend proudly crowed. I would agree that that the two of them have a fine future ahead, in the culinary arts.

So went the evening, and one of my rare summer forays into the Sonoran realm. With reliable air conditioning, in both Sportage and this house, being out in the warm desert evening air was actually pleasant. Tomorrow, I will stay here long enough to host a late-morning Zoom call, then head back towards Home Base, and stay tuned for what the week shall bring.

The Tiredness and The Shame

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Striving

August 9, 2023- With slumped shoulders and a downcast expression, she handed me a pink tardy slip, apologizing as if the entirety of her lateness was her doing, alone. I suspected otherwise, and asked for a few more details, which the child was relieved to be able to share.

All too many children, it seems, are caught between dependence on those who are barely able to care for themselves-and actually having to raise themselves. The little girl has good judgment, so in the long term, I’d say her prospects for a solid adulthood are quite good. She does not suffer fools gladly-a good thing in my book, nor does she sneer at people who see things a bit differently than she. She also has strong, clear boundaries-which I have advised children to inculcate, as long as I have been advising in general.

D was tired, and felt shame at that fatigue. “I went to bed early enough”, she offered, “It seems the morning comes too soon.” No one, to my reckoning, should have to feel shame at physical states-and I communicated as much. There are too many variables involved in the matter of sleep, as with other health matters-and pre-adolescence, a swell as the change that follows it, are filled with interruptions, expansions and contractions that are bound to try anyone’s patience. How well I remember my own years of transition from childhood to youth!

I left her alone, with her close friend, and being a responsible soul, she pulled herself together enough to complete an assignment and launch into the next activity. When it came time to leave, though, she was first on the way to the bus line.

D, and about a dozen of her peers, have joined the community that lives in my heart. I will look out for her, whenever I can.

Lion’s Gate 2023-

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Posted by on in children, collaborating, Education, impediments, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Striving

August 8, 2023- The pile of self-assigned “homework” has been put to bed. I graded about 65 papers, this evening, using the Answer Keys that were left me, with Bold Tags that said “ANSWER KEY”. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge, but not necessary. Projecting ahead to the regular teacher’s return on Thursday, I foresee a tired soul, enervated by a flightbj across country and drive up from Phoenix-and not needing three days’ worth of student work in front of her. So, it was the right thing to do.

Lion’s Gate comes from the perceived leonine energy derived from this point on the Zodiac: Leo. It is a fairly productive period, for anyone who is not a house dog, or otherwise subject to heat-induced sluggishness. I have to be on game, with three classes of self-absorbed ten-year-olds.

It’s been a fairly good two days, as evidenced by the size of the pile that was dispatched this evening. Tomorrow will be a bit shorter in length, but no less intense, in terms of my expectations of both myself and the children. The material, designed to be diagnostic, is definitely that- and is rather challenging, at this point in the year. The teacher will definitely know who is in need of what skill-building activities, when this is done.

Leonine energy, taken as such, is viewed as proactive. A lion, or any big cat, needs to be diligent, merely in order to feed itself and its progeny. It has to be wary of competitors-such as hyenas (also viewed these days as “feline”), and humans-who, in the case of Maasai and other hunter-gatherer nations, may view the big cat as both a threat to be culled, and even a food source-though I don’t see the value in eating the flesh of a carnivore.

We don’t face the daily threat of starvation, for the most part, but there is the daily set of activities, choices and expectations that require a lion-like focus. It is this that leads me to not focus so much on the heat-as on accomplishing what is in front of me for the given day-and week.

Luck Holds

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

August 7, 2023-

This is a simple verse, marking an ordinary day, in which so many affirmations came.

With the urge to turn off the alarm, before it had a chance to bray : “FIVE A.M!”, the left leg moved off the bed, followed by the right hand reaching over and switching the lever off.

A half hour later, grooming and dressing , done in the mirror’s honouring gaze, was in rear view, followed in short order by devotions-and a check of what transpired overnight.

A mention of the trials impending, in D.C. and Florida; another mention of tribulations, across the Great Plains, and headed towards D.C. Cloud cover, here though, tempering the heat.

Plenty of food on hand, for breakfast and lunch. Plenty to be shared with my colleagues of the next three days-a bit of pound cake here; a box of cookies there. Treats go fast, in that school’s lounge.

Children, vibrant and caring, yet struggling with transition from the days of everything and nothing, to these days of something substantial. I recall these same beings as little more than toddlers, now gingerly entering their second decade of life. There is the pretense of not knowing, a facade covering the real questions: Are we loved? Do we matter?

They always matter; are ever loved, at least in these brightly lit and climate-controlled rooms. I treasure this time spent-today, and will tomorrow, and the next day.

The next stop, almost directly after school, is the serving line. Loaves of bread are contributed, along with a couple of Care Kits. I am the soup ladler, not a hint of the “Nazi”, of television fame, just gladness at being able to help those of scant luck feel positive energy. That luck, scant and fleeting as it may seem to the unhoused, is here each Monday night. They love the onion soup tonight. I love that there is a full crew to do clean-up, and I get to leave early.

Each day brings its blessings, with challenges met and surmounted. My luck is holding, rather nicely.

On Agency

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

August 3, 2023- The former President of the United States faced a Federal Magistrate today, for the second time in a month. He heard the charges against him, pleaded Not Guilty and thanked the Magistrate, before being released in his own recognizance. He maintains innocence, until proven guilty. He maintains agency, regardless.

The topic of agency arose, this evening, during a study session on the matter of public discourse. While the discussion ended up a bit off the rails, largely due to my being a bit tired, after a long day, and thus, not moderating matters as well as I might have, the agency of both those who were carried away in dialogue and those who felt left out, were addressed by the end of the session. Ground rules were established, going forward.

Ironically, the whole kerfuffle came about when the subject of the agency held by children was brought up-by yours truly. That led to discussion about gratuitous spanking of toddlers, and the umbrage taken by some people of our, and our parents’, generations when objections to such “punishment” are raised. Those who got carried away are of the opinion,as am I, that striking people just perpetuates violence. The others in the group, themselves hardly people who believe in corporal punishment, felt “point taken, now let’s move on.”

I have evolved in my thinking on the matters of both agency for children and of corporal punishment. I once believed in the pecking order, that children should serve adults. That went out the window, when I caught some adults using that notion of “service” as a pretext for abusive behaviour.

I have never given our son anything less than respect for who he is, nor have I, save one or two unfortunate lapses of judgement, as a teacher and counselor, seen fit to belittle a child’s soul. My own experience of corporal punishment, as a child, was sparing. Mom and Dad regarded it as tool, to be used judiciously. I followed suit as a parent, until it became obvious to me that there is a conflict between using force as a parent and communicating responsible behaviour to one’s child.

My overall sense, for the longest time now, is that each person, regardless of age, has personal agency. The child needs guidance and reinforcement. The elder needs reassurance of continued relevance. All of us in-between, likewise, need consistent respect, regardless of our positions on matters being discussed or positions in a community.

A Not-So-Lonely Highway

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, distraction issues, impediments, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving, Travel

July 29, 2023- A solitary man, either befuddled by the heat or determined to stand his ground, stood squarely in the path of my slowly-moving Kia, as I approached a rest room, at the more aptly named than usual Area 51 Alien Center. The heat, and an approaching full moon, seemed to have brought more unusual behaviour than I’ve seen, over the past eleven years, in that little settlement of Amargosa Springs. I felt badly for the two ladies who were staffing the Alien Center’s store.

The man in question moved along, when I simply turned right and found a parking spot away from the rest room. When I drove across the street, to the Alien Center’s parking lot, he blocked my way with his car, so once more, I turned right and simply found a space that was not in “his zone”. He drove off without any further ado.

The drive down from Carson City was itself quite smooth. I left a bit later than planned, as my help was needed with an online Zoom call, which was best done from the motel room. Breakfast to go sufficed my LA Bakery fix, for this visit. (That establishment, and Red Hut, are my must stops in Carson.) Stopping briefly in Yerington, an hour to the south, I found another favourite, Blanhir’s Bakery, was closed-odd for a Saturday noon. Oh, well, down through Schurz, Hawthorne and Mina, towards Tonopah, it was. A brief rest stop at Luning, just north of Mina, provided an opportunity for service and let’s just say, I fixed a problem that had been left to sit , by earlier visitors. I’m sure the trucker who came by, just as I was leaving, appreciated the problem-free rest room.

Beans and Brews, in Tonopah, is mostly staffed by local teens, so it has been a must-stop, when going to and from Carson City or Reno. As usual, the counter person was energetic and quick to fill my small order. The lady at the adjacent convenience counter, on the other hand, looked like she was melting in the heat. I wished them both a fine afternoon, and went on-past Goldfield, which still does not have the truck stop that’s been in the works for over a year. I think the earth-moving equipment is in the same place it was, last November. Passing through Beatty, and stopping for a quick supper in Amargosa Springs, I encountered the above-mentioned individual-and a worker from the brothel next door, who didn’t bother me, but looked like she needed a good long rest.

What happens in Las Vegas is best left there-but I found reasonable gas, at a station that had been sending patrons to the nearby Wendy’s, for restroom use. Wendy’s, unbeknownst to the station attendants, has closed. I let them know that state of affairs. Fortunately there is a huge shopping mall across the road. An iced coffee from Panera Bread addressed two needs, and I was again on my way, in short order.

Four hours and twenty minutes later, another journey was in the books. It helped me confront a few remaining personal baggage items, without any faux pas, which leaves me with a nice feeling. Thank you, to all in California, Oregon, Washington, British Columbia and Nevada. This was a truly nice two weeks-even through the heat.

Jitterbug, with The Munchkins

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Entertainment, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

July 28, 2023, Carson City– The cast was set to dancing and jumping about, in this version of the spell cast by a cheekier version of the Wicked Witch of the West. W3 did not feel like even hinting at opium being an acceptable diversion and so came the Jitterbug, whose weapon was getting everyone to dance until they dropped from exhaustion. The classic dance marathon, instead of deadly poison, was a tad more family friendly-but W3 still asked Scarecrow if he wanted to play ball.

“The Wizard of Oz” first came into my consciousness when I was about nine, and we started watching it, as a family, once a year. When I hit my mid-teens, the watch party shifted to a gathering of friends-still a time for laughs and feigned fright. Seeing that it has not lost its appeal is re-assuring. There is much that is not ersatz about our culture, and these are the totems that I hope will remain.

Children and teens are almost universally dear to my heart. One of the dearest was on stage as a Munchkin, her time under the klieg lights about five minutes of play time and a few minutes at the end. In our pre-play conversation, I re-assured her that this is how just about everything starts. The first jobs are almost always the equivalent of a small role, with few lines. It is approaching the task with aplomb, with the confidence that one is going to do the small stuff well and move up the ladder, to a place that is deserved, that makes the dream become reality.

So she did her small role well, being visible and audible from where I was sitting, with her grandmother, in the second row. Afterward, the three of us went to a fast food place and each got an orange cream shake. We talked of the importance of agency, which she has already stood for, as she described an incident in which she asked that officials remove a poster she finds offensive. She heard us say: “Good on you and keep standing for justice, even when-especially when, it’s hard.”

I will always stand beside her, her brother, cousins and any other young person who is looking at being hazed or subjected to injustice.