Category Archives: Inner Struggles

Angels and Extraterrestrials

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal goals, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

March 4, 2022- A review of my Birth Chart, this afternoon, showed what I have long suspected: I am a mess of contradictions, with the stabilizing aspects of my personality holding forth. Those who have stayed with me, these past eleven years of Word Press and at Xanga, beforehand, know it has not been easy. It has gotten easier, since mid-2015, largely because I owned all the stuff and nonsense that went down in the 2000s and in the months and years immediately after Penny’s passing, and learned valuable lessons from a lot of it.

There has been a lot of influence, and what I’d call support, from unseen forces. A small amount of dark energy, both visible and invisible, has made itself known as well. People of faith know these forces as angels (light) and demons (dark), and we can debate those concepts all day long. Suffice it to say, I have felt the protection and assistance of light energy. I have also met beings who seemed to appear out of nowhere and who have disappeared in the blink of an eye. These have been helpful beings in all but one instance. Who knows whether they are angels or are extraterrestrials? In any case, my life goes on and I feel safeguarded, even in situations that could have been far more precarious.

This is about the time when I look at Spring, Summer and Fall. Part of my Birth Chart review looked at transitions that will affect my life. Of course, there is also the 1-ton pachyderm of eastern Europe that affects everyone’s life. I am squarely on the side of what elevates human dignity and the well-being of citizens. My original plan for this year was for extensive travel. Thus far, the early Spring visits with family and friends in the Southeast U.S. are on track. June-July, in the Northwest U.S., Canada and back through the Northeast and Midwest, may be altered a bit by some Faith-based gatherings here, but is generally on track. It is October, involving Europe, that may end up Putinized and pulverized into either being severely altered to an Iceland and British Isles itinerary, or canceled altogether. No matter, the plans pale in comparison to the horrors now going on across the Atlantic and elsewhere. Each of us must do what is right, by the suffering.

My angels are ever-present, and respond best when I exercise common sense. We’ll see how the rest of the year goes, both at Home Base and on the road. Pray-and work- for peace, in any case, just because the poor souls in Ukraine, Yemen, Myanmar, DR Congo and in every drug-lord ruled community on the planet, deserve it.










Sweet

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Striving

March 2, 2022- A state legislator, censured for advocating executions of her political opponents, on a public gallows, fired back at those who voted for censure-saying they were picking on a “sweet grandma”.

To be sure, the First Amendment to the United States Constitution guarantees freedom of speech, even for those who say people of different ethnicities have horns and a tail, or words to that effect. Yet, there are laws that forbid making specific threats against the safety and well-being of other human beings-or hurting most animals, for that matter.

I am sure the legislator is sweet to her grandchildren, if not her children. Loving people who are one’s bloodline is well nigh universal, save for those who are deranged. That tells me the woman has some semblance of heart. Her comments, at a recent gathering of white supremacists, tell me that she has spent precious little time listening to those who offer views different from her own. They also give readers and listeners who disagree with those comments a sense that she herself may be a bit unhinged.

We have had a long, hard road together, vis-à-vis race relations, especially between Blacks and Whites, but also between Whites and First Nations people as well as between First Nations people and Blacks. Much of the discord involves failure to listen, to observe, to accept others for who they are. It’s true that there are people in each group who have taken advantage of their own, and who have ingratiated themselves with the dominant group. It is also true that there are people within the dominant group who have suffered at the hands of “their own kind”. This, however, does not take away from the aggregate of the dominant group, in a good many countries, having the responsibility for erecting a system that perpetuates their dominance, at the expense of those outside their circle.

Real sweetness does not hate.

What She Knew

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Posted by on in collaborating, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Striving

February 26, 2022- The forthright man told of his reaction when one of his children broke the news of gender reassignment. He also had the courage to walk alongside that child and grew in his understanding of what was behind the process. When that child’s life ended, father and child parted as friends. Most importantly, the adult child was friend to self.

When I was a child, I was far from athletic and presented a gentle disposition. That didn’t set all that well with some of the other boys in the neighbourhood, or with those in my paternal grandmother’s neighbourhood, when we visited over there, every other Sunday. In retrospect, the bullying wasn’t all that bad and I was rarely attacked physically. One thing I always knew, though, was that I was solely interested in girls, and never felt the secret urge to BE one.

Not everyone is clear, as to their gender, as their childhood and adolescence progress. The reasons for this range widely-possibly the effects of additives in foods, possibly chemical imbalances, possibly lack of either same sex or opposite sex role model. The causes are all speculative, but the result, for those who choose gender reassignment, is a physically and emotionally excruciating process-lasting several years and possibly the rest of the person’s life.

I have friends who are transgender. It is because of them that I have made my own transition, from glib detractor of those who chose gender reassignment to one who sees the background of the process more clearly. The person who makes such an irreversible choice does not lose humanity nor becomes less worthy of the love of friends and family. The person grows in need to be enveloped in love, much as does a woman who undergoes an abortion or someone who is suffering an addiction. No one has the right to discount another person’s pain.

The young adult mentioned above died while asleep, and was thankfully in a supportive living space. Suffering appeared to have come to an end. What she knew about herself was confirmed-and accepted by those around her, at long last.

I will forever be glad to be male and cisgender; (he/him). I extend the peace of identity to everyone.

Scorpions

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Posted by on in children, distraction issues, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Social, Striving

February 16, 2022- Intellectuals love to savage children. It makes them feel oh, so clever-and relieves them of any accusation of being sentimental. Ignorant people love to address children by their surnames, as if they were adults. It makes them feel like they are readying the young ones for a hard world. The insecure, among the older generations love also the see no daylight between childhood and adulthood. It helps them to mask the pain of their own formative years. The greedy love to use children for their own ends-because nothing is more important than stroking their unbridled egos.

My prayers are with Kamila Valieva, that her native talent was disrupted, waylaid, and maybe destroyed, by the greedy among her own countrymen; that she is being held solely responsible for this, by some of her predecessors in the Olympic figure skating realm, whose jealousy is so ridiculously transparent-and justified, to the extent that it is possible to excuse their vitriol, only by the presence of dope in her system and that the cursory reading and viewing public will take the braying of the international sports media to heart-and vilify the girl, for the duplicity and treachery of her handlers. She could have done it all, without the drugs that society loves to hate, but no-once again, the elite show themselves as scorpions, eating their young.

May God bless and heal you, Kamila.

Smoothing Rough Edges

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Posted by on in collaborating, distraction issues, Inner Struggles, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Striving

February 13, 2022- The kitchen forgot my order, and was busily going about serving the rest of the patrons, when I went to the window and lodged my complaint. I don’t often do that, but there are limits. Having overdone it, timewise, last night, and facing a 10 a.m. Faith meeting, I had no other recourse, as we pay in advance at the Legion, and walking out was not seemly. My plate was brought, five minutes later, by a rather miffed server, but no matter. I thanked the server, and was told by the manager that my next breakfast would be on the house. Again, ordinarily, I would hold my tongue and wait, but not keeping other people waiting, on the other end, is still important.

As it happened, I had to wait a few extra minutes to be admitted to the meeting, for whatever reason (I doubt being two minutes late had much to do with it.) The meeting was detailed and productive, and I felt my grumpiness fading, early into the discussion. It was a good reminder that one always needs to smooth out the rough edges-even if dealing with a surly individual. The buck has to stop somewhere.

The rest of the day offered an opportunity to relax a bit, then spend an hour or so over coffee with my Hiking Buddy and her house guest from Massachusetts. They arrived a bit late, but I had recharged my well of patience and had an enjoyable visit, in a welcoming coffee house setting.

The next time I go to the jam session, I will stay overnight and tend to my meetings from my lodging. Rough edges don’t need sharpening.

What Makes Me Proud

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Posted by on in Education, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 8, 2022-

What makes me proud of the man I helped raise? His work ethic, independent frame of mind, commitment to the well-being of humanity, love for his wife and maintaining self-care. What makes me proud of the young people I help educate? Their day-to-day enthusiasm, even when it is a bit loud; concern for one another and for the adults who show them respect; open-mindedness, even towards those whose beliefs seem antiquated; dogged pursuit of truth; gradual and steady outreach to those who are marginalized. What makes me proud of my community? The commitment to virtuous behaviour, even when it flies in the face of demands made by those towards whom some feel obligated to show fealty; the standing up for what one believes, whilst for the most part letting opposite points of view be openly expressed; the commitment to open space and increasing willingness to conserve resources. What makes me proud to bear witness to my Faith? It is based on the oneness of humanity; owning up to, and working to shed, prejudices and other flaws; independent investigation of truth, not dependent on group pressure or self-aggrandizement; the equality of women to men.

I am proud to be part of a world where the best among us work to empower one another, to show respect, even to those who disrespect us.

Random Thoughts On The Passing Scene

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Posted by on in Assistance, children, collaborating, Community, Education, Family, impediments, Inner Struggles, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving, Travel

February 7, 2021- I had a relatively productive day, getting a Special Needs child to do what her lead teacher said was a prodigious amount of work. That the child let me know when she’d had enough, in a nice way, was certainly fair, and she got a break for the last half hour.

The title of today’s post is borrowed from the great Thomas Sowell, with whom I have rarely agreed, but whose tone has always been respectful towards those of other viewpoints and whose diction has always been impeccable. Dr. Sowell’s columns of this ilk would touch on three or four items of general interest. This post will look at three such topics.

I am curious, as to why Supreme Court Associate Justice Clarence Thomas joined in a ruling that stayed a prior ruling, by a lower court, which would have nullified redistricting maps for Congressional seats, in the State of Alabama. Then again, he ruled earlier, with the majority of the Court, that much of the Voting Rights Act of 1965 was antiquated and thus worthy of disposal. It is likely that the good Justice feels he will vote anyway, when the spirit moves, and needs no special fiat from Congress, or any other organization. He’s right in that respect, and it should always have been thus. Reality, though, oftentimes needs a nudge. No one in their right mind is going to tell an Associate Justice of the United States Supreme Court to shuffle on down the road. As for those among the Joe and Jane Sixpacks of the nation, who happen to be African-American, the facts sometimes tell a different story. We have a long way to go, in the area of bona fide equality between the “races”. Going backwards should never be on the table.

Nina O’Brien, one of the top members of the United States Olympic Skiing Team, suffered a debilitating leg injury, in yesterday’s competition, at the Beijing Games. My parental mode kicked into gear, at this news. The heart hurts when any young person hurts, especially when the person is acting responsibly and in good faith. Active sport always entails a risk, as does any vigourous activity. Nonetheless, and even though this particular Games event is unlikely to turn out to be an American medals blowout, my heart goes out to everyone who has made the effort to keep this a sporting event, and not a High Five for authoritarian excess.

On a more personal note, in planning a combination observational and family/friends visit to the Southeast, from mid-March to mid-April, I came upon an eponymous soul, who is one of the management team at a botanical garden, in southwest Florida. He says he’ll be glad to meet me, and likewise. There are only about a half dozen of us, so this interesting encounter will likely be far more personally affirming than, say, a gathering of the John Smith Association or Mohammad Ali Society, if such entities even exist. That said, my best to everyone named John Smith, or Mohammad Ali.

Vagaries

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, distraction issues, Fiction, Historical, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal Values, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 6, 2022- As a switch, this evening, I put on a dark comedy about a woman who is recruited to be a Deputy U.S. Marshal, based on the true story of Francis Miller, an Oklahoma rancher, who DID become a peace officer. The antagonist in this film happened to be an Afrcian-American, who had himself owned slaves in Texas. Just how many such men there were in the South is debatable, but they did exist. This individual was presented as somewhat of a psychopath, who nonetheless served as a dispassionate observer of the hypocrisy exhibited by those who swore to uphold the law.

Antisocial people can frequently excel at pointing out the flaws of others, usually because it serves as a distraction-and helps them get the drop on those who are trying to bring them to justice. As happened, to a degree, in this film, so does it seem is unfolding on a wider scale, in the modern world. Autocrats love to turn the tables and claim what is wrong is actually right; what is dark is actually light; what is hateful is, in truth, loving kindness.

As it was for one Richard Andrews, in the film “Lady Lawman”, so it is for any number of would-be tyrants, who charm those living in uncertainty and self-loathing, building a loyal corps of defenders and toadies. How their particular stories play out, depends on the attention level of those seeking to bring justice to society, as well as to the integrity of those people. We’ve seen, in the past, how much fortitude and fastidiousness was required, in order for justice to prevail. Let us now again steel ourselves and not be either distracted or dissuaded by the difficulty presented by latter day miscreants, either at the local, national or international levels.

A Queen and Her Precipice

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Posted by on in collaborating, Community, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Matters of Faith, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 5, 2022– It’s been a busy day, with a service project and two meetings to keep me honest, until mid-afternoon. This is all part of what Elizabeth Peru talks about, when discussing keeping the soul relevant and staying connected to the Oneness. Besides, I do things that I enjoy.

It is also bittersweet, as the morning paper brought an essay on Cheslie Kryst. The suicide of any young, highly intelligent, sassy, multi-talented and comely human being is a disaster, at both a deeply personal and a profoundly social level. I looked at the images of Cheslie and could only think, “God, I wish I had known her, could have intuited something was wrong and reached out. ” If I have been guilty of overkill in any area, it has been of a near obsession with the well-being of the younger generations.

Yet, I leave my son to forge his own destiny, while dropping everything when he calls. The thing is, he knows he CAN CALL, day or night, and I will drop everything else. I devote snippets of time, here and there, to those in my circle of friends, of all ages, whose issues are chronic, even seemingly intractable, with the understanding that I will get over to see them or at least talk with them, when I can. The bottom line is that each one continues to matter, and none need consign themselves to the scrap heap.

Cheslie Kryst had family who loved her dearly; friends and mentors who guided her, the best they knew how to guide. She had a loving group of well-wishers, who cheered her on, throughout her wonderful moments of triumph. There was also a chorus of dementors, who hounded her to end her life, and in that final, terrible end moment of dejection, that last group forced her hand.

Simply put, no one deserves the fate wished on them, by those whose own lives are miserable and who lack the courage to set those wrecked houses in order. No one deserves to feel so alone, even in the dark of night or early morning. If you read this, know that, in a moment of despair, you may reach out and I will find a way to send out a message of hope-that you may back away from that ledge of doom.

Plus and Minus

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Posted by on in Assistance, collaborating, impediments, Inner Struggles, Inspiration, Personal goals, Personal Values, Service Activities, Social, Spiritual, Striving

February 1, 2022- Going into a local bank to pay my monthly housing rent, I was struck that there is one teller, who tends to about 45% of the branch’s total daily business, on each of the five days that she is there. The young lady has a pleasant demeanor and is especially engaging with those who are regular customers of the bank. While her colleagues staff desks or are busy counting cash or auditing transactions, B deals with all manner of people in their moods of the moment. I have mostly seen her treated well and complimented by people in line ahead of me, as she takes a genuine interest in their affairs. I have seen her get harshly, verbally abused on occasion, for matters that were decided in board rooms and corner suites far from here and, thus, beyond her control. Of course, she had to “take ten” after such a browbeating and regroup, while people like me were feeling an almost parental pain on her behalf.

The frontpeople in our lives have suffered, sometimes in silence and sometimes standing up and retorting to their critics. The pandemic has brought this to the fore, but it has gone on for decades and centuries. The negativity of ego takes aim at even the most positive of loving souls. I have seen tons of it; probably most of us have. Disquiet, unhappy people have written or spoken diatribes, directed at everyone from the neighbourhood grocery clerk to Jesus the Christ. The aphorism, “Hurt people hurt”, says a lot, but overlooks one thing: Those who do the most good have figured out how to overcome personal attacks, or to let them slide off like water. Better, still, are those who can turn adversaries into loyal friends.

B, the teller, has a handle on this. I have managed to get to that place as well, though I was much older than she is now, before reaching it. Those who succeed in life, in the real sense of the term, are the ones who can spread this way of being to all who cross their path.