The Summer of the Rising Tides, Day 50: Bingeing

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July 20, 2020-

I only occasionally binge watch Netflix or Amazon Prime. It takes a special character, usually a spunky kid or a compelling character, to get my extended attention. Likewise, in following a blog site, I may lose track of someone i’m following, but when I catch back up, the tendency is to at least read a month’s worth, and comment on every single post. If the blogger sees this and thinks I’m Spam Stalker, I guess I’ve had that coming-but that’s never my intention.

Bingeing is rare occurrence, precisely because, even in this time of not working, there are all sorts of expectations from online and real time friends, family and Instant Family-the last group being people who address me as “Brother” or even “Father”, even though we’ve never met. I’m always glad to lend a hand, when time allows. Budgeting, though, even with time, is still key to living a full life-of one’s own. God knows, there are plenty of people out there who will gladly have me living THEIR lives.

So, to the blogger of whose posts I read and commented on 30 posts, this afternoon, know that it was done out of appreciation for your extraordinary writing. No harm, no foul.

Obliqueness

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May 16, 2019-

Just some random thoughts, on a blustery but otherwise laid back day:

  1. I contacted my employer, and found there is one person doing the work of three.  Sound familiar?
  2. May is seeming more like March, around here.  Higher elevations in the Rockies may get snow, over the next few days.
  3. I would weigh in on Game of Thrones, but-a) I’m still watching Season 7; b) The outpouring of dissatisfaction is a perfect distraction from real-time events; c) The outcome is not subject to popular opinion.
  4.  No sooner did I wonder what on Earth I was doing here, than three different projects presented themselves.
  5. One of those projects involves an All-in-One Printer.  Guess what has gone kaput and needs replacing?
  6. I’ve said it a few times:  I count many different people, all ages, ethnicities, creeds, orientations and body types, as friends.  That stands, because it’s who I am.  If you are kind, considerate and honest, I am your friend.
  7. Romantic interest, though, is my private domain and no, I won’t “consider all the possibilities”.  Nor will I intrude on anyone else’s business, in that regard.  We are each entitled to our own preferences, and I am drawn, in that way, to some women, but not to others.  I guess that makes me neurotypical, in that respect.  I don’t think it makes me mean.
  8.   No offense is intended, in any of the above remarks.
  9. Life is sacred.  Consider the safety and well-being of others.  These two statements are not contradictory.
  10. The planet and its parts, including living parts, deserve to be honoured.  It’s possible to make a living and still be honourable.  Let’s figure this out, together.

Inward, Outward and Onward

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SAM_8722

 

We are each on a journey of some sort.

 

I’ve had a lot of thoughts and a few conversations, over the past month or so, as to what sort of person always seems to be on the move, and what exactly is it that such a person is seeking.  I can only speak for myself.  I have been peripatetic from Day 1, it seems, and not just in the sense of exploring new physical locations or different scenes.  My nose has been in a book, far more often than my feet have been moving forward.  Ironically, though I love to be walking here and there, when the occasion requires, I can sit still for hours on end, patiently reading, watching the most inane TV shows or just letting my mind wander.  This last characteristic served me well during my Penny’s final year- much of which I spent at her bedside- because there was no place I wanted to be more.

Whether one is engaged in a building project, sitting at dockside with a fishing pole in hand, coaching a soccer team, designing jewelry, doing one’s taxes or climbing Sagarmatha, a journey is a journey.  There may be miscalculations and setbacks along the way, and re-dos are the task of the lucky.  The rest end up in one abyss or another.

This brings me to relationships.  I was more fortunate than I can ever express outwardly, that I had the companionship of a blithe spirit and keen intellect for thirty years.  I will have a spiritual bond with Penny for all eternity, and there will never be a time when I don’t feel her presence.  I am fortunate to be surrounded by family, in an ever-distant outward ring, which is nevertheless always pulsating.  I am fortunate, too, to have friends both near and far- those who understand me, and still refrain from judging.

Some ask, why do you not want another companion?  The quick answer is, I am a self-contained unit, and always have been.  Penny drew me out and aided me to build on what my parents instilled in each of us- to be urgently aware of our surroundings, and BE HELPFUL.   I’m far from dead, emotionally, and see women I consider attractive, in one way or another, every day.  The most important thing, though, is that I have finally learned that it is the friendship, not the attraction, that sets us free.  I would rather have a hundred good friends, or a thousand, than be in any relationship where one of us is feeling like “Damn it, I can do better.”

So, I am happy to have the friends in my life, female and male, young and old, on whom I can count and who can count on me, with no ulterior motives.  We are each on a journey, every minute of every day, and it is a fine thing to see a traveler smile along the way.